


Before the Game (Another Pre Game Fic)

by detectivemysteries



Category: New Dangan Ronpa V3: Everyone's New Semester of Killing
Genre: 18+, Abuse, All the v3 characters are in this, Bisexual Saihara Shuichi, Gay Oma Kokichi, Homophobia, Incest trauma, M/M, Murder, Non-abusive Pregame Oumasai, Nonbinary Shinguji Korekiyo, Nsfw content, Other ships included are Tenhimi and Kiyogonta, Pre-Game Personalities (New Dangan Ronpa V3), Romanji spellings for Ouma and Shuuichi, Self Harm, Sexual Humor, Suicidal Ideation, TWs on every chapter, There is a lot of abuse and trauma shown or implied in this, Trans Oma Kokichi, Trans Saihara Shuichi, Transphobia, Violence, drug usage, every character has their own personality and development, hes not a weak little baby but hes not like his ingame version either, i dont write pregame kokichi in the same way people normally do, non-romanticized mental illness violence and self harm, pregame, religious trauma, they are in love, this fic will have over 100k words at its completion so know what youre getting into!!, tragic ending that will be fixed in the sequel, two messed up weirdos find love and then they both mess it up, you will get your happy ending i swear to god
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-09-17
Updated: 2021-03-04
Packaged: 2021-03-07 22:21:28
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 22
Words: 57,684
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26515120
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/detectivemysteries/pseuds/detectivemysteries
Summary: 50+ years after the great tragedy, society has been somewhat rebuilt; governments have been reestablished, cities repaired, families restarted. However, despite everything being over, the killing game "Danganronpa" still exists, and has still been going on for 52 seasons. First continued by underground organizations filled with despair as a tribute to the original games. But as society evolved, the games got more and more popular. With advancing tech, all of the newest games are done in virtual reality simulations, and no one is allowed to truly die. The winners get large amounts of money, and even just the participants are paid handsomely for their time in the game (and merchandise sales). Usually, the killing game runs its full course until there are two or even just one person left, though on a few rare occasions the mastermind is found out and the survivors win (these are especially popular seasons).  Danganronpa, made by Team Danganronpa, is the #1 show in the world.This story follows a Third Year Highschool student, Kokichi Ouma, and how he inevitably joined the inhumane death game that he swore to never watch.18+ ONLY
Relationships: Oma Kokichi/Saihara Shuichi
Comments: 36
Kudos: 96





	1. Basement Stairs

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kokichi and Shuuichi meet in the school basement. Kokichi doesn't know how to feel about this weird man... but their interaction isn't unpleasant.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hiiiiii I'm writing this note way in the future from when this chapter was published! I promise this story gets good around Chapter 8. I also wanted to say that despite what you might see in the beginnings of this story, I'm against the romanticization of drug usage and it's going to get better for the characters and You if you're struggling with that! Hehe, I hope you enjoy my fic! <3 <3 <3 <3
> 
> No TWs

Kokichi sits in the school basement, just on his phone like usual. He’s waiting for his father to come and pick him up. Normally people will have their parents pick them up from school at the regular time if they are unable to take public transportation or drive themselves, but Kokichi and his Dad have a different deal going on. The traffic makes his Dad angry. Kokichi doesn’t want him angry, so he suggested being picked up an hour after school ends. It works, and it’s what they've been doing for years. 

However, something different will happen today.

Usually, Kokichi doesn’t hear many noises in the basement. Sometimes machinery will buzz and hum for a bit. Sometimes he’ll hear the flush of a toilet above him. The bugs don’t make noise, though Kokichi definitely does when he sees them. He plays with his messy hair and picks at scabs under his raggedy uniform when he’s not just on his phone.

Thunk. Thunkthunkthunkthunkthunk…

Kokichi looks up immediately, nearly dropping his phone. At the bottom of the stairs is a student lying face down, having fallen down the stairs. He’s got on a school uniform- a well tailored and kept black suit jacket and pants. A hat sits on the ground having been knocked off in his tumble. Kokichi catches a sight of unruly frizzy hair a blue so dark it could be mistaken as black.

Kokichi wonders if he should check and see if he’s okay. Normally he doesn’t care, but he wants this guy gone before he has to leave. After all, he’s blocking the one exit that Kokichi knows about. Sure, there are probably other ones, but they’re inconvenient to him. And why go all the way to another exit when he can just tell this guy to piss off and be on his way?

“... You good?” Kokichi gets up and looks down at him, bumping the boy’s head with his foot.

It’s a few seconds before the man looks up. He looks around and then looks up at Kokichi with a somewhat pleasant face. Kokichi notes that he’s wearing black lipstick and eyeliner, though other features are less well defined in the dim light. Kokichi takes every detail in like he always does, noting the small black lipstick stains on the student’s collar and how the tie is tied wonky.

“Whew… what a tumble! Haha, oops.” He reaches for his hat and quickly puts it on.

Kokichi takes a few steps back. He doesn’t offer his hand or anything. In fact, he debates on even saying anything in response. His upper lip twitches in annoyance. “Yeah. It was.”

The man holds the brim of his hat down some, looking in Kokichi’s vague direction but not once looking him in the eye. His nails are long and pointed, painted black with a few chips. There’s a blush spread across his face, and he looks sweaty. Thankfully Kokichi can’t smell it- if Kokichi even got a whiff of BO he would just straight up leave. The boy with the hat purses his lips together and starts fiddling with a torn part on the brim of his hat. “Um, sorry. Thanks for asking if I’m okay though!”

“Whatever,” is Kokichi’s response. He turns away, watching the other get up from the corner of his eye. He sits down in his usual spot and pulls his phone out again, just expecting this guy to leave. Who would want to sit in a crappy, dirty basement anyway?

That doesn’t happen though. 

The man sits by the stairs, looking around a bit. Kokichi doesn’t bother looking up, instead hoping that if he thinks about it hard enough the other boy will get the memo and leave. He only dares to watch the other in his peripheral vision. Looking someone’s direction is a death sentence that screams ‘I’m paying attention to you, pay attention to me too!’ and Kokichi would rather have a knife in his stomach than have his existence acknowledged. Think… Think… it rarely works. No one understands social queues like that. They’ll believe what they want to believe.

“So, uh, what are you doing down here?” Hat boy asks after about a minute of silence.

Kokichi looks up at him, making eye contact for a split second. The other man breaks it almost immediately, grabbing the brim of his hat and tilting it down to hide about half of his face. It looks ridiculous. Kokichi clears his throat and answers somewhat truthfully. “I sometimes go down here after school.”

“Oh, so I’d be able to see you again if I came here tomorrow?”

It’s said mostly innocently, but nervousness bubbles up in Kokichi’s stomach. Shit, he said the wrong thing, and this guy might try to see him more. He could’ve had bad luck again and this guy could be a stalker or one of those Freaks who wants to kill people. Guess he has to find a new hiding spot, but that’s probably the drama queen in him speaking. He bites his lip and spits out his next response rudely. “No. Why would you even want to do that?”

The other boy laughs a bit awkwardly. “Um, no reason, you just seemed nice at first. I won’t go down here again if you want me gone.”

Shit, there it is. Kokichi can’t help but feel pity for the guy. Pity. He hates the word and actions taken out of it. He hates feeling it for people who feel none for him. Maybe he’ll be a bit nice with an open ended response. “People don’t come down here often so it’s just me usually.”

“So what’s your name? I’m Shuuichi Saihara by the way, uh, third year.” This ‘Shuuichi Saihara’ looks to the side, crawls forward some, and sticks his hand out quickly, as if he had been debating it and decided ‘fuck it!’.

Oh. That’s who he is. Kokichi’s heard all about him from his friend. Nothing good, but nothing… bad?

Kokichi reaches forward and gingerly shakes his hand. Ugh, formalities. He’d rather not have to shake the clammy hand in front of him, but the action had already gone into motion before he could stop it. “Kokichi Ouma. Third year too.”

The other boy doesn’t quite let Kokichi’s hand go yet, grabbing it with both hands instead of one to shake it. Kokichi stumbles forward a bit, other hand reaching out to support himself. “Ah! That’s a nice name, Ouma-kun! I’ve seen you around but we don’t have any classes together so I didn’t know your name… Your hands are so soft and small and you’ve got a nice firm handshake…!”

Said ‘firm handshake” is just Kokichi trying to dig his nails into this guy’s hand to get him to let go. He bares his teeth in a half smile half grimace. “Yeah. ‘Firm Handshake’.”

Shuuichi lets go without realizing that Kokichi was trying to get out. Kokichi’s hand retracts at record speed, and he notices his own nail marks on Shuuichi’s hand. He really doesn’t know how Shuuichi didn’t notice it, or how he just totally ignored it. Maybe Shuuichi’s just stupid.

A hand is brought to Kokichi’s face, poking at one of his bandages. “You’re covered in bandages Ouma-kun, what-”

Kokichi smacks his hand away, scooting back against the wall and making a noise of almost-disgust. “Have you ever heard of personal space!? What is wrong with you?”

“Ah-?? I’m sorry!” Shuuichi brings his hands back to himself, twitching a few times and cringing at his mistake. Kokichi squints at him, noticing that Shuuichi still won’t look him in the eye. It would be rude to force it.

He sighs. Shuuichi is weird, yeah, but he doesn’t seem harmful. Especially with what Kokichi’s friend says about him- that he’s weird, does costumes in an ‘unconventional’ style, and is like a lost dog looking for someone to be nice to him.

Kokichi’s lip curls, but he doesn’t speak with the amount of malice he means to. “... Just don’t grab me like that.”

“Eheh.. got it, Ouma-kun.” Shuuichi flashes him the nicest smile he can muster, which looks sincere but slightly askew. Kokichi doesn’t mention the lipstick he sees on his teeth.

Kokichi’s phone dings and he takes it out, seeing the ‘here’ text from his dad. He frowns, putting his phone away and grabbing his backpack. “My ride is here, so I gotta go. … See you later I guess?”

“Yeah, I hope I see you again Ouma-kun!” Shuuichi gives him a little wave on his way out. Kokichi almost panics and thinks that Shuuichi might follow him, but he realizes that he doesn’t have anything like that to worry about. He walks out of the school without incident, the image of the boy he met in the basement burned into his mind.


	2. Her (Ew)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Cosplaying with Kokichi's friend Tsumugi! Kokichi's not a cosplayer, really, but he can't say no to her proposition.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The first few chapters are a bit short aha sorry....
> 
> TWs: Abuse

“How’s the school year going for you, Ouma-kun?” Tsumugi asks, folding a cosplay of hers up before sitting down on her bed. She pats her lap. “Come sit here baby boy~”

Kokichi nods at her order, sitting on her lap. He hunches his back and stares at the floor in front of him with a blank stare. “Um, it’s okay I guess. Akamatsu and Momota keep giving me dirty looks and Momota threatened me yesterday. I’m expecting my grades and homework habits to drop soon.” He debates telling her about Shuuichi. He knows she hates him, and doesn’t want to hear her talk about it. 

Tsumugi giggles, wrapping her arms around Kokichi. She pays no mind as to how he freezes up when she puts a hand on his unbinded chest. She had told him to take it off earlier to be safe. “We all know how bad you are with homework. How about you cosplay with me again tonight?”

“Again? But-“

“For me?” She squeezes him a bit tighter. Their friendship started with blackmail in second year- Tsumugi wanted a small boy she could cosplay with who could fit in her extra cosplays. And Kokichi was perfect. She told him she would share the pictures with his classmates if he didn’t continue it. And it slowly moved forward- the two hanging out in the library when they had lunch block together, and around once or twice a month Tsumugi asks him to come to her house. She hadn’t contacted him all summer though. Kokichi wasn’t even sure if she still liked him until she greeted him with a hug and kiss in the library their first day back.

Kokichi tries not to groan or get angry. He can’t do that. “... Okay. Who are we cosplaying today?”

“I’m doing Junko again for a contact sponsorship, all the cosplay companies want to be with me after I worked on a few of the designs for Danganronpa last year, can you do Mikan with me?”

He doesn’t know anything about Danganronpa, but he’s generally not too okay with cosplaying whoever ‘Mikan’ is. The pair is one that they’ve cosplayed together a few times already. He hopes it’s not the bloody nurse outfit version. The other one he’s okay with but the bloody nurse outfit is tight and short. Kokichi nods and Tsumugi lets go of him so they can get up.

“I’ll pull everything out for you, just stay put Ouma-kun! I’ve got a great photoshoot planned for us.”

Kokichi tries hard to pull down the back of the nurse outfit. He stares at himself in the mirror with a frown. Thankfully he’s able to change in a locked bathroom. He pulls the garters up and attaches them to his briefs. Tsumugi’s shoes are big on him and uncomfortable, so he grabs them and waits to put them on for later.

Tsumugi asks if he’s ready through the door and Kokichi quickly exits the bathroom. She’s got her skirt hiked up, shirt fitted as tight as it can be, and probably more than one pushup bra. She fusses over a few details in the costume before putting the wig onto Kokichi and pushing him in the bathroom to first do her makeup, and then his makeup. The whole time, she rambles about things going on in the costuming community.

“Your makeup is going to look a thousand times better than most of the Despair Mikan cosplayers. It’s started to become a trend for people to do makeup that looks like she’s crying mascara… and it’s very plainly unattractive,” She talks on and on while applying minimal makeup to Kokichi. “I’ll have to edit your bruises out in pictures though. Nasty things.”

“... Sorry.” Kokichi speaks quietly, knowing that if he says something rude back she’ll get angry.

Tsumugi just sighs in response. She puts some blush on his cheeks and steps back. “Okay, we’re done! Come on, let’s get some pictures. Junkomikan is so hated in the community and it makes me sad… everyone’s always calling it ‘abusive’. I’ve told you about it, right? You’ll agree with me that it’s okay?”

Kokichi vaguely remembers what she’s talking about. It always disgusted him. He looks to the side and then back at Tsumugi. “I agree. People are weird on the internet. Let’s go get pictures, Shirogane.”

She positions him however she sees fit, grabbing his legs and arms and pulling them into positions. Moving his waist and hips to different directions. Tilting his chin up and telling him to make a smile. Tsumugi places her hand in fake blood, flicking it onto Kokichi’s face and smudging it on his arm.

“Ow! Hey, watch it!” Kokichi grabs at his watering eye, a drop of fake blood dripping from the corner. “If you’re going to flick blood onto me gimme a warning at least.”

Tsumugi grabs his face and pulls it up, close to her own. She stares at his eye and pulls it open with her nail to see the damage. “It’s fine, Ouma-kun. This stuff barely stings, so stop being a baby. Unless you want me to put more in!” She laughs a bit at the last part, placing a finger to Kokichi’s nose playfully.

“Let’s just get the pictures done,” He whines and grumbles, trying not to rub at his eye.

As soon as he grumbles Tsumugi snaps an awful look at him, nose wrinkled and grey eyes meeting Kokichi’s own. “Fine then.”

She doesn’t talk for the rest of the photoshoot, only taking a few more pictures with Kokichi before removing her own large wig. “I’ll take the cosplay back. You should go ahead and get your Dad to pick you up, I’ve got a bunch of work to do tonight.”

Kokichi bites his lip and nods, gently removing the ratty and tangled wig on his head and setting it down. He rushes to the bathroom, locking himself in and taking way too long to remove his makeup and costume. He folds the pieces up as best he can and sets them on the floor for Tsumugi to grab later. When he exits, Tsumugi is sitting on her bed in her underwear with her back to the door. He decides to avert his eyes and leave the house, waiting to be picked up outside instead of spending the rest of the time with Tsumugi.


	3. Freaks

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> For once not being the one first getting into the tussle, Kokichi finds that weird kid Shuuichi again. He's dared to flick the chip on Kaito's shoulder, but it looks like there's not much of a fight in schedule today.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Despite what this chapter might show, Kaito's character is more than just a bully in this.
> 
> TWs: Fighting, Homophobia

Kokichi usually minds his own business with most people. It saves him from interacting with anyone he doesn’t want to, and it also saves him from getting his ass kicked. There’s one exception to this though. 

“Freak, I’ll fucking kill you.” The sound of someone spitting causes Kokichi to look up.

Of course. He regrets looking up. Kaito Momota is the first person he recognizes in the scene. He’s 6 feet of ‘I’m a baseball player and I have parental issues!’. If you look at him the wrong way he’ll threaten to kill you. He spikes his purple hair up, likely due to his obsession with the more masculine heroic characters from Danganronpa. He’s practically obsessed with the red shirt he wears under his open gakuran (the same school uniform that Kokichi wears, just in a different size), saying that it’s expensive and designer whenever people ask why he’s breaking the dress code to show it off.

Not that Kokichi could give a shit.

The second person he recognizes is the boy from the basement, Shuuichi Saihara. Shuuichi is pinned to a wall with a disgusting glob of spit on his face, looking at the ground. His hat covers his red face, and Kokichi watches a drop of sweat roll off of his chin and hit the floor. Gross. He wonders what Shuuichi did to piss him off.

Shuuichi stammers out a partial response, and Kaito lets his shirt go. He doesn’t back off though, staring Shuuichi down and insulting his unwillingness to make eye contact. A few of Kaito’s fake friends groan at him, telling him to knock it off before he gets caught. Kokichi’s sure they’re only around him so they can make fun of him in their private group chats. As pathetic as Kokichi knows he himself is, at least he doesn’t have a whole group of people of ‘friends’ who don’t even like him. That only flew in middle school, now Kokichi just spits on anyone who tries to come near him with false kindness.

Kokichi’s stupid anti-Kaito reflexes kick in at the wrong time. Kokichi’s been going to school with him for a few years, and has known Kaito long enough to be on his literal hitlist. Kaito’s sworn to kill him one day from how many times Kokichi has pissed him off, though Kaito’s never actually tried to go through with it yet. Sometimes just Kokichi’s existence is what makes him angry. But usually it’s due to Kokichi deliberately being a bitch to him.

He walks past Kaito and grabs a pencil from the floor. Then, he shoves it directly in the back of Kaito’s pants right inbetween his two buttcheeks.

In a few seconds this sequence of events happens. Kokichi attempts to run away, not looking back. Kaito yells and lets go of Shuuichi, arm flailing and hitting Kokichi hard enough to knock him to the floor. Shuuichi yelps, trying to see just what happened. He surprisingly doesn’t run.

Kaito grabs the back of Kokichi’s collar, yanking him up and choking him with it. He fumbles with his other hand, pulling the pencil out of his pants. He stares at Kokichi for just a few seconds before growling and realizing who it is. “Of course it’s fuckin’ you. Always pissing me off!”

Kokichi freaks out, trying desperately to breathe and get Kaito to stop. He looks back at Shuuichi and glares, trying to convey the message to leave. Shuuichi takes a few steps back, bringing his hands to his chest nervously after meeting Kokichi’s eyes. He quickly looks away, but doesn’t seem to get the memo. He wipes the spit off of his face and waits for Kaito to leave. 

“Scared of having something up your ass aren’t you-“ Kokichi says, voice scratchy.

“Fuck off. Fuck you. You’re the fucking fag here. Don’t think I’ll let you get away with that.” Kaito shoves him to the ground. Kokichi groans and rubs his throat, scratching at it hard to get the feeling to go away. 

It’s a sore subject. Once Kokichi figured out Kaito’s repression he started using it to his advantage. It makes his stomach sick. Bringing it up either makes Kaito stop, or it makes him a thousand times worse. The “violent homophobe is actually gay” trope is an ugly one anyway. In fact, it’s so ugly, that this is going to be the only time it’s mentioned. But it’s the game they play. Kaito knows Kokichi’s birthname, and probably has old pictures of him, but neither will release the information to others for fear of their own being spilled. They just torment each other anyways.

“You get that cut on your lip from your Dad, Ouma?” Kaito spits down at him. From this angle, a large brown stain on his shirt is in view. Kokichi swears he can smell something.. Is that coffee? Of course he’s upset if someone stained his favorite shirt.

“You get that bruise on your cheek from your Mom? Huh, Momota?” His voice wavers, stomach turning and an awful pressure in his chest.

Kokichi and Kaito stare at each other. Time passes slowly, neither wanting to back off and break eye contact first. That shows weakness.

Kaito thankfully fucks off, though he does kick Kokichi hard in the side on his way out. It’s been a month since school started and thankfully this was the first physical incident that Kokichi had with Kaito. He thinks that Kaito had been waiting for an opportunity, as the two had just been verbally pissing each other off for a while. Kokichi started it this year, tossing a pencil into Kaito’s hair out of boredom the second day. Since then Kokichi’s had a few crumpled notes of death threats chucked at him and his foot stomped on in the hallway a few times.

Shuuichi rushes to Kokichi’s side after wiping his face off. For a guy who has only had a brief conversation with Kokichi, he looks incredibly concerned. “Ah- Ouma-kun! A-are you okay?”

He puts his hand on Kokichi’s shoulder. Kokichi shoves it off while he sits up. He winces. “Ugh. Fuck.”

“Ouma-kun is too nice…” Shuuichi says. He quickly shuts his mouth, not having meant to say that out loud. “You shouldn’t go around doing that. Thank you..! Ah, Momo-kun usually doesn’t go that far… I spilled some coffee on his shirt and he got really upset… after I said a few things to him.”

Kokichi thinks back to the blush on Shuuichi’s face, and thinks about it too hard. No, Shuuichi doesn’t like it. He just doesn’t know what to do when a big strong boy puts hands on him.

“What is wrong with you?” Kokichi asks after about a minute of silence. Though, he’s not one to talk. He doesn’t know why he deliberately tries to piss Kaito off. It can likely be summed up as a weak attempt to appear confident. Kaito likely wouldn’t even bother him if Kokichi didn’t start fights first.

Shuuichi laughs awkwardly and looks away. “There’s a lot I could probably say to answer that.” He turns back to Kokichi, now with a smile on his face. He grabs both of Kokichi’s hands and starts thanking him more. “But thank you… you’re really brave you know that? Can I hug you? Can I carry you anywhere? I can do anything you want in return!”

“Gh- carry? Hug? No, I’m fine.” Kokichi tries hard not to blush when Shuuichi grabs his hands. He wants to jerk his hands away, but doesn’t for some reason. There’s something comforting about Shuuichi’s warm and clammy hands. They’re different from the cold harsh hands he usually holds.

“Please? I’d feel bad if I didn’t do something in return…..” Shuuichi bows his head down, just barely looking up at Kokichi in an attempt to persuade him.

Kokichi grumbles, face growing hotter at the look. “..... Fine. Help me to the storage shed,” He mumbles just loud enough for Shuuichi to hear.

Now, what Kokichi was expecting was to get up on his own and maybe lean on Shuuichi when his ribs ache. Nope. Shuuichi wraps both of his arms around Kokichi and hoists him up. Kokichi yelps, grabbing onto Shuuichi’s back and putting his legs around him for fear of falling.

“What the fuck!? Um-!”

“Haha! On we go, Ouma-kun! Storage shed, right?” 

Kokichi detects nothing but innocence in Shuuichi’s voice, and it makes him relax a bit more. He grabs Shuuichi’s suit jacket in both of his hands and hides his face in Shuuichi’s shoulder. “Yeah just drop me off there.” He hopes no one sees him like this.

“You’re so light…”

Kokichi swears if he makes an anorexia joke he’ll bite this guy.

“...It makes you pretty easy to carry! I’d carry you any time you want, Ouma-kun!” Shuuichi pats his back a few times, his cheerful mood evident in the way he steps and speaks. “You’re like, ah- um- this is gonna sound a little weird, but you’re like this character in season 10 of Danganronpa.”

Kokichi bites his lip. He’s never watched Danganronpa other than what Tsumugi makes him. He was wondering how long it would take for Shuuichi to bring it up with him- after all, a lot of people hate Shuuichi because it’s practically ‘all he talks about’, even if they themselves are fans of the show.

“Oh, I am?” He grits his teeth.

“Yeah! He’s one of my Comfort Characters-! I mean, He’s just sort of like you I guess. He’s small and cute! His name is…” Shuuichi starts babbling on about this character and a few others and the plot to season 10 of Danganronpa. Kokichi doesn’t pay much attention, instead watching the floor move from under Shuuichi’s feet.


	4. Storage shed

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Shuuichi brings Kokichi to meet with a not-really-friend Ryoma. He offers them something to smoke and a few words of advice.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Another short one... sorry... next chapter is pretty long
> 
> TWs: Cigarettes

The smell of cigarette smoke hits him almost immediately, and Kokichi knows that he’s there where he needs to be.

“Ouma? Hey, is he okay?” Kokichi can’t see him, but he hears the familiar deep voice of Ryoma Hoshi. They’re not exactly friends per say. No, they don’t even talk much. But Ryoma had seemed to take a liking to Kokichi- occasionally bringing him lunch, and sometimes they smoke together at the storage shed. He’s a handsome, rugged student with dwarfism and a smoking habit who usually dresses down, leaving his dress shirts half unbuttoned and wearing open suit jackets. Ryoma keeps his hair buzzed, though it’s been growing out a bit as of late.

“Yeah, I’m fine,” Kokichi grunts, still gripping onto Shuuichi’s shoulders.

Shuuichi laughs a bit, eventually setting Kokichi down. “Oh, hi, I didn’t think Ouma-kun was visiting anyone here. Momo-kun go into a fight with him so I offered to carry him here. I’m Shuuichi Saihara by the way.”

Shit, Kokichi wasn’t planning on telling Ryoma he had gotten into a fight. He winces slightly and looks at Hoshi, who furrows his brows and takes a drag from his cigarette.

“Ryoma Hoshi. Thought you were leaving that behind, Ouma.” Ryoma sighs and shrugs, pulling a cigarette pack out of his shoulder bag. “You two sit down here. Relax for a bit and have one if you want.”

Kokichi sets his own backpack down on the ground, sitting down about a foot away from Ryoma and taking one out of the box. Kokichi carries around his own lighter, but he has a policy to never buy his own drugs and that includes cigarettes. He looks up at Shuuichi, wondering what he plans on doing.

“You guys want me to smoke with you?” Shuuichi asks, sounding confused.

Ryoma looks towards Kokichi, then back at Shuuichi. “Sure. Unless you don’t smoke. Then don’t start.” He’s calm, leaning his small body against the wall of the shed. Ryoma gives out an air of mysterious comfort- like there’s no ulterior motive to him being nice, but there’s other things under the surface.

“Cigarettes are nothing compared to crack cocaine!” Shuuichi sits on the ground in front of the two of them, grabbing one and chuckling at his own… joke? Is it a joke? What the fuck.

Kokichi and Ryoma give each other A Look, and then look back at Shuuichi. Kokichi offers him a lighter, and the three of them just sit there peacefully.

“So, how do you guys know each other?” Ryoma asks, raising an eyebrow.

“I saw Saihara fall down the stairs a few days ago.” Kokichi tells it like it is, taking a drag. Ryoma has stopped bothering to tell him that he’s holding the cigarette like one would a blunt.

Shuuichi laughs awkwardly. “Aha… yeah… And today Ouma-kun saved me from Momo-kun! You should’ve seen how brave he was.”

Ryoma chuckles. The two aren’t even friends, Shuuichi was just doing a favor for him. Kokichi’s a bit put off by his talk of bravery when Kokichi just wanted to shove a pencil down Kaito’s buttcrack. He seems the kind of guy who would die for you if you did one nice thing to him.

“Interesting. I’m not the type to step into a fight on impulse like Ouma, but I can understand it when it comes to Momota. I try not to piss off people here though. Usually if you mind your business you can go under the radar.” Ryoma flicks some ashes onto the ground.

“I didn’t like hearing him talk about how he was going to kill Ouma-kun, and now I had a face to the name. I kind of spilled my coffee on his shirt hoping that it would make him angry but not enough for him to lash out.” Shuuichi bows his head, almost as if he’s apologizing.

Kokichi rolls his eyes. Of course he was doing that. It’s been a while since Kaito had been full on threatening him. Kaito’s crazy as fuck and anyone can see that- always talking about training for Danganronpa, where he’s going to kill everyone and win for glory and money. Kokichi and he were never friends, but he was there when Kaito had started on this odd philosophy.

“Don’t feel bad for defending a friend. Everyone’s got something worth fighting for, and for some people, friends are everything.” Ryoma puts his cigarette out on the wall and tosses it in a small bucket nearby that's filled with old butts. Haha.

He’s not your friend, is he Kokichi? He doesn’t bother trying to say it. Shuuichi’s been nice enough to him that it doesn’t matter to spit out a protest.

Shuuichi smiles and fiddles with the collar of his shirt a bit. “You’re so full of wisdom, Hoshi-kun! Thank you, can I do something in return for the cigarette?”

“Nope. I gave it to you not wanting anything back but your time. I’ll be here for a bit. I always wait for the school cat to come by before I leave.” Ryoma smiles when mentioning the cat.

“She’s a sweetie.” Kokichi recalls the times that the cat has come by when he hangs out here with Ryoma. They’ve been doing this since about halfway through 2nd year, when Kokichi stumbled to the shed after getting a minor concussion from Kaito on the same day his Dad had threatened to kill him the first time, and he decided to sleep at the shed.

“I love cats, maybe one day you’ll be able to see my cat Hajime! He’s fat and an asshole but he’s the best cat ever.” Shuuichi pulls out his phone, typing in his passcode with one hand and pulling up a picture of a very fluffy dark brown cat. Kokichi wonders if he’ll ever be close enough friends with Shuuichi to meet that cat.

“Ouma, when’s your Dad coming to pick you up?” Ryoma asks, knowing the schedule by now. When Kokichi doesn’t go to the basement, he goes outside to the shed where Ryoma goes after school. While Kokichi stays for his Dad, Ryoma stays after school because he can just walk home to the nearby neighborhood.

Kokichi checks his phone, noting the time. Seems his Dad’s running a little late, but he got the ‘just left’ text a while back. “Probably soon, I should probably start walking so I don’t smell when he gets here.”

“Aw, you have to leave already?” Shuuichi frowns, putting out his own cigarette and mimicking Ryoma so he doesn’t litter. “Ouma-kun, Hoshi-kun, can we do this again on Monday?”

“I don’t see why not. We talk a lot more with another person around. Usually Ouma doesn’t even say anything.” Ryoma stretches his arms and uncrosses his legs casually. He looks up at Shuuichi with a smile and a wink. “You can come by any time, I’m always here.”

Shuuichi grabs one of Hoshi’s hands both his own, tilting his head up so his hat doesn’t cover his face as much. “Thank you so much Hoshi-kun!”

Kokichi doubts he’ll be back on Monday like Shuuichi said. He hauls his backpack up over his shoulder, leaving without a goodbye to either one. Shuuichi gives him a little wave when he glances back. The smell of cigarette smoke shouldn’t linger too long, and even if it does the scent of his father’s car greatly outweighs what clings to his clothing.


	5. Party baby (nsfw)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Being invited to a small party by Tsumugi is fine, Kokichi's more interested in whatever they have to drink there than any of the people. Kokichi gets to meet Shuuichi again, as well as Shuuichi's bffsie Gonta. Tsumugi's friends Kaede and Miu are there too, but Kokichi's less than fond of either one of them. Who's this Rantaro guy who everyone's excited to see? And why's he in the closet with Kokichi doing silly stuff?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Possible dubcon tw? It's at the end and there's consent and they're both equally drunk. It's not with Shuuichi ( :( ) I kinda hate this chapter haha... But Gonta's introduction is really funny.
> 
> TWs: NSFW, Alcohol, Blood (Marking with a knife)

“Hey Shirogane, who’s…” Kokichi says the name of the character that Shuuichi said he was like. He.. he’s totally not interested. But he wants to know a bit more about this character. He tried searching up the character, but didn’t know how it was spelled and ultimately failed.

“You want to know about him? Well, he’s in Season 10 of Danganronpa, and he’s the 4th chapter victim. He’s a tsundere, and he’s really shy and gets mad when people try to get him to open up. Him and his killer are soooo cute together actually. Why do you ask?” Tsumugi didn’t think that Kokichi would know or pay attention to any character’s names from Danganronpa, especially since she knows that Kokichi doesn’t like Danganronpa.

Quick! Come up with a lie! “Someone was talking about Danganronpa characters in the hallway and talked about liking him and a few others but I can’t remember their names.”

The two of them usually don’t hang out twice in one week, but Tsumugi had texted him to come over because she wanted to throw a party. He couldn’t refuse, so Kokichi came over and helped her get things- including copious amounts of alcohol, which is the main reason Kokichi agreed to come. Kokichi doesn’t like buying it himself, he doesn’t look 18 and he doesn’t have his own ID, but Tsumugi wanted him to come with anyway.

“Makes sense! The party guests should be coming soon. Amami-kun, Akamatsu-chan, Saihara-kun and his friend, and I think Akamatsu-chan is bringing one of her girlfriends here too.” Tsumugi chuckles. “I only invited Saihara-kun because he begged me. I told him that the one and only Rantaro Amami was coming here and he got on his knees.”

Kokichi’s not too keen on Kaede being there. But he knows that Kaede and Tsumugi are pretty good friends, as weird as their friendship is. He also knows that no, Kaede doesn’t have an actual girlfriend, that’s just how Tsumugi refers to some of her girl friends. He doesn’t think he Wants Kaede to be gay with how much of a bitch she is.

“Have you met Saihara-kun yet?” Tsumugi looks at him, almost accusatory. “You aren’t friends with anyone I hate, are you? You’re still my baby boy?”

Kokichi swallows his spit. Should he lie? If he’s caught, Tsumugi won’t be happy. But he can’t tell the truth. Kokichi puts his lies to the test. “Is that the guy with the creepy obsessions and weird costumes? I only talk to you, Chabashira, and Hoshi.”

“That’s my good little brother. I wouldn’t want you to get hurt, or have bad influence. People like him will turn you against me.” She pats his cheek and starts arranging a few things in her room. “Mind dressing up in something more interesting?” Tsumugi turns to Kokichi, looking his plain outfit up and down.

“What’s wrong with the way I dress?” Kokichi asks as if he’s not literally wearing a raggedy bleach stained sweatshirt and basketball shorts that barely fit him anymore.

Tsumugi sighs dramatically. “You’re wearing ugly clothes. I’ll pick something out for you so you don’t mess it up.”

This is something she does quite a bit- insult Kokichi on things like his appearance, clothes, grades, etc etc. He just takes it, because it’s not like he can argue on it. She’s usually right. She gets up from their place on her living room couch and skips on into her room. Kokichi sighs and follows her, awkwardly hanging at her side while she picks things out. He doesn’t really want to change, and he knows that Tsumugi only owns girl clothes.

Tsumugi herself is in a white sweater and a short navy skirt. She had talked about wanting to have ‘hatesex’ with Rantaro earlier while talking about what she was planning on wearing. Kokichi really tried to not look when her underwear was showing.

“Let’s show off that body of yours some, Ouma-kun! It’s what you’ve got going for you. And if anyone says something, I’ll tell them clothes don’t have gender.” Tsumugi tosses a black turtleneck croptop, shorts, and knee high socks towards Kokichi, who stares down at them nervously. “Everyone’ll be wearing stuff like this. Maybe you’ll catch a date!”

Kokichi can’t really say no, so he gathers them up and heads to the bathroom to change. It’s Tsumugi’s party anyway, who is he to tell her no? They fit him like most of Tsumugi’s clothes do, and when he exits the bathroom, four guests are already there, having all arrived at once.

“Hey who’s that WHORE back there!”

Yup. Kaede saw him. Kokichi wrinkles his nose and slinks out, giving her the dirtiest glare. He notices her and the other guests standing at the door as if they just came in. Kaede’s in a tight red bodycon dress, the clasps of her corset easily showing through. With the hoops in her ears she almost looks like that bitch from Panty and Stocking. Shuuichi is next to her, looking to be in his normal school uniform without the suit jacket, his sleeves rolled up and the first few buttons undone as well as his tie loosened.

“Haha, good one, Akamatsu-chan! You’re the best at insulting people!” There’s another girl with wild curly strawberry blonde hair next to Kaede in a barely fitting white tube top and a pink pencil skirt. Both girls are wearing bright makeup that matches their outfits, and they have matching handbags. It’s like if DollsKill were two people. The other girl’s presence seems secondary to Kaede’s own.

An extremely large, extremely muscular man with unruly long brown hair and glasses is next to Shuuichi, wearing a black cropped t shirt and pants that seem like they both don’t fit at all. Thank god Kokichi’s not the only boy with his stomach out. He puts a hand on Shuuichi’s shoulder and Kokichi can swear he can see the button of his pants threatening to pop off. That might also just be his own internalized prejudice though. “Fuck, no one invited you, Iruma. Hold your tongue for once in your dumb life!”

“Ouma-kun! These are Miu Iruma, Gonta Gokuhara, and Shuuichi Saihara, since you haven’t met them yet. This is Kokichi Ouma, my little brother.” Tsumugi makes her way to Kokichi’s side, wrapping her arm around his waist. “Not actually, I just call him that.”

Kokichi tries not to flinch or grimace at her touch. Actually, his first thought is to defend the outfit he’s wearing. “She made me wear this. And hi.” Kaede and him lock eyes for a little bit, but Kokichi averts his gaze first.

Everyone fully enters and Tsumugi puts some music on while they all converse and wait for the last guest to come. The first person to actually greet Kokichi is Gonta, who laughs and kneels down. “Fuck, you’re TINY! You’re a Little manlet aren’t you.”

He wrinkles his nose at Gonta. “And you’re big and ugly but I didn’t feel the need to point that out.”

Gonta frowns almost immediately and stands up to his full size, glaring down at Kokichi. “You’ve got some balls trying to insult me. You're lucky Shuuichi told me about you I guess.” He pauses, bites his lip, and sighs almost sadly. “Agh, um. My bad. I’m working on it. Being big and scary, that is. Not the being big part. I can’t change that. But the being scary part. I’m Gonta Gokuhara- wait, you already know that. Fuck, okay, well, I’ll reintroduce myself.”

What is with this guy?

He coughs and clears his throat. “Gonta Gokuhara! I’m a nice guy!” Gonta bows to Kokichi formally, and sticks his hand out for Kokichi to shake when he moves back up. He seems to be waiting for Kokichi to shake his hand back.

“Um, Kokichi Ouma.” He shakes Gonta’s large hand for a few seconds before they both retract their hands. “You know Saihara?”

“Shuuichi’s my best friend. Bffsie. For ever. Five ever. Best bro.” Gonta laughs at his own ‘joke’. “Known him since middleschool and FUCKED him! Yeah!”

Kokichi winces at how loud this guy is. He’s already pretty terrified of the size of Gonta, but at least he’s loudly talking about Shuuichi and not threatening Kokichi. “That’s, uh, that’s great I guess? I didn’t need to know that. I literally met the guy this week.” He tries to scoot his shorts down a bit so less of his thighs are showing.

“Ah! Ouma-kun!” Kokichi turns his head towards the sound of his name, seeing Shuuichi coming up to the two of them. “I didn’t know you were friends with Shirogane-san. You uh- you- uh-!” Gonta smacks Shuuichi’s back and tells him to spit it out and stop stammering. “-You look cute!”

He flushes at the compliment, looking to the side and covering his stomach with one of his arms. “Er. Thanks. I didn’t know you were friends with Shirogane either.”

“Aha… yeah… it’s complicated…” Shuuichi laughs awkwardly at the mention of Tsumugi. It really does seem like the two have a complicated relationship.

“Hate that bitch,” Gonta mumbles, rolling his eyes and crossing his arms. “I only let him go to this party because Shirogane told him that one of his favorite Danganronpa contestants is coming here.”

Kokichi looks to the side. Sure, he doesn’t like some of the things Tsumugi does, but he’d feel too guilty talking smack about one of his only friends. “Uh, she’s, better when you get to know her I guess?” He sounds incredibly unsure about himself, and it seems like Gonta notices this but doesn’t comment on it.

“...” Gonta decides to change the subject. “Who are the other girls here? You know them Shuuichi?”

“Yeah! There’s Akamatsu-san, we watch Danganronpa together and she keeps people from making fun of me since I keep creepy boys away from her. And the other girl is Iruma-san, she sort of just follows Akamatsu-san around like a cat. She’s banned from the robotics room too because of the way she dresses. Oh! And she bought Akamatsu-san their matching bags I think.” Shuuichi recalls what he knows about them.

The three girls are actually all together at the other side of the room, giggling to themselves. Kaede seems to have one of her hands up Miu’s shirt in a way that surprisingly seems less gay and more.. bad... than it sounds. Tsumugi laughs at Miu’s wimpy reaction and they continue talking.

All three boys were looking at them, and they all turn back towards each other, slightly confused. Yeah. Girls are confusing.

Ding… dong…

Oh, that must be the final guest. It doesn’t mean too much to Kokichi, but Tsumugi skips her way to the door, followed by both Kaede and Shuuichi, and Miu follows Kaede. The door is opened and Kokichi catches a glimpse of the guy. Ohhhh… he sort of recognizes him. Green eyes and hair, a white t shirt and jeans and a pretty nice build. He’s got six piercings on one of his ears, a lip and nose ring, and two eyebrow piercings on the side opposite to the pierced ear.

“Hey Shirogane.” He speaks with a bit of disdain, and then looks at Shuuichi and Kaede. His expression immediately lightens to one that’s more flirtatious. “Didn’t know you had attractive friends.”

Rantaro steps in and the small crowd makes way for him. Kokichi’s looks at Shuuichi, seeing the other boy quite literally drooling. He decides that the situation is too weird to watch, and looks up at Gonta. “I’m gonna go get something to drink.”

He makes his way to the kitchen, grabbing the first bottle of hard liquor he can find and drinking as much as he can in one go without throwing up. Kokichi sets it down and leans against the counter, wondering if he can find a blanket or something. But he figures that he can ‘head to bed’ as soon as his chest starts hurting from his binder. He grabs a bottle of sweet wine and pours himself a glass, figuring the more he drank the easier tonight would be. Maybe he’ll even have sex with someone here, since it’s been too long since he’s done something self destructive that feeds into his hypersexual tendencies.

Someone bumps into him at the counter, both of them cursing and nearly dropping their drinks. He turns around to find Miu, alone and seeming a bit scared. It looks like Kaede is talking with Shuuichi and Rantaro, and Miu was fetching drinks for them. 

“Watch it, you could’ve made me spill my drink.” Kokichi takes a drink from his glass, looking the girl up and down.

“Eeu…. are you looking at my body?” She looks down at him, wrinkling her nose and pushing her chest out as far as she can. “Then take a good look at least! Don’t be shy about it! Though I suppose shy is sort of cute…. Hey is your friend single? The big guy not the gross sweaty guy.”

Wow. That is a lot to take in. He steps back, shaking his head no. “What? No to everything, I don’t even know the guy?”

“Ohhh… Tch. I have to do everything myself I guess….” Miu huffs, sipping Something that Kokichi can’t name. She looks to be tipsy already. “I’m not supposed to be drinking, but Akamatsu-chan told me to. ...Hey! Look at me when you’re talking to me!”

Kokichi looks up from his phone at her, bored of the conversation already.

“You should look up to your superiors, kid. Um, that’s me. I’m your superior. Uh, Ouma, right? That’s your name I think. And if it isn’t you’ll just have to deal with it. It… it IS your name, right?” This Miu girl has issues or something.

“That’s my name so you got it correct.” He fiddles with the bottom of his shorts, trying to cover himself.

Miu seems to notice this and points at him. “Boys shouldn’t wear girls clothes, are you stupid? It makes you look like a submissive! Unless you really aren’t a boy I guess, but why would a girl lie about that and wear girl clothes. Unless you’re tryna get it on with a gay guy! Not that I support that, I mean, gay guys are kinda cute and all, and-“

“I’m done with you, can I drink more now?” It’s a rhetorical question. Kokichi really doesn’t care what this girl is saying, he’d rather go see if Tsumugi or Shuuichi or hell even Gonta is free to hang out with him. Or, honestly, if he can just leave this stupid party.

“Y-you can’t ignore me…! You aren’t supposed to do that, I-!” Miu is interrupted by someone approaching from behind Kokichi. He feels a hand on his shoulder and tenses up before hearing a suave voice next to his ear.

“Is this girl bothering you?”

Miu makes a pathetic noise, shrinking away. “Eeuuu…. I wasn’t bothering him! You- you’re the one who’s bothering him!”

Kokichi turns to see Rantaro, glaring at Miu with quite the terrifying face. “Do you know who I am, Iruma?”

“... Yes…?” She looks terrified, searching around for an escape.

“Then you’ll listen to what I say and leave. Go talk to your friend Akamatsu.”

Miu huffs and turns around, leaving the two of them alone. Rantaro chuckles and lets go of Kokichi’s shoulder, walking around him and pouring two shot glasses. Kokichi doesn’t know if he didn’t notice that Kokichi’s already drinking something, but he doesn’t complain.

“You aren’t gonna thank me baby?” Rantaro teases, pushing the second glass towards Kokichi.

“I was fine on my own,” Kokichi says and sets his glass down on the table. He eyes the shot glass and picks it up.

Rantaro clinks his glass against Kokichi’s and downs in it one go. “So, how’d you meet Shirogane? Must suck being friends with such a bitch.”

“Er-“ He takes his shot and thinks back to how they actually met and figures telling the truth wouldn’t hurt. “She blackmailed me into cosplaying with her.”

“She blackmail you into wearing that? Not that I’m complaining, especially from behind.”

Kokichi huffs, trying not to let himself blush at the man’s compliments. “You don’t hold back do you.”

“Why would I? I wanna get to know you a bit before I ask if you want to fuck. Got any hobbies?”

His words make Kokichi practically reel. Kokichi stumbles a step back and brings his glass of wine to his lips, murmuring out a response. “Going from fucking me to asking about hobbies.” He takes a few sips. “I’m sort of an artist, but I’m uh, not too good. I’m working a job but like hell am I telling you where I work. At night I like going out catching frogs I guess. Don’t really do much else. You?”

This small talk was pretty weird to Kokichi, but he supposes he can do it. Rantaro chuckles. “Do you not watch Danganronpa? I was in the last season, sort of won I guess. It’s all I really do other than drugs and talking to cute people. Got a cute little pet ferret at home. His name is Stinkbug the Second. The first one got eaten by a Hawk.”

“If you’re not clean I’m not doing anything with you. Why are you going after me and not the people who are actually trying to talk to you?” Kokichi finishes his glass of wine and sets the glass down on the counter. He blinks a few times, already feeling a bit dizzy, especially from the previous liquor chugging.

“Don’t worry baby, I’m clean. It’s the one thing I’ll willingly go to the doctors for.” Rantaro laughs and looks over at Shuuichi, Kaede, and Tsumugi, all talking to each other and occasionally glancing over at Kokichi. “I think it’ll be more interesting if I hooked up with one of the people that isn’t actively trying to hit it. Give em a real surprise. Plus, I’d do anything to spite Shirogane, including fucking her ‘little brother’.” He makes mock quotation marks and gags at that. Kokichi notices that Rantaro seems just as drunk as he is- stumbling and wobbling back and forth with a deep flush on his face. “So how’s about it? Won’t pressure you if it’s not a strict yes, especially since I have other options.”

“I’ll do it, yeah, as long as you don’t try and talk about me after we’re through.” Kokichi accepts without even thinking. He doesn’t see too many red flags, especially since Rantaro told him he wouldn’t do it without a strict yes. Besides it’s not like he hasn’t hooked up with people after knowing them for less than a day before, drunk or not. It’s kind of a habit to whore himself out to anyone who’ll take him. That list isn’t very long.

“Great, wanna sneak away to a closet or something? As fun as unwrapping you like a present in front of everyone sounds, you seem more like a private guy.”

Kokichi practically chokes on his own spit, blinking hard and looking to the side. He thinks of all of Tsumugi’s rooms and pinpoints a closet he thinks would work. Something quick and impersonal, but still far enough away that he won’t have to worry about it. “Yeah, I know where we can go. I’ll tell people bad things about you if you say anything about me.”

“Sore subject, got it. Tell em I’m 4 inches hard and have dick cheese if I’m bad, k? Lead the way, Bonkichi. It’s a cute lil nickname I think suits you.” Rantaro walks forwards, patting Kokichi’s ass on his way. Kokichi turns around fast, and takes the lead, hoping that no one is going to notice their absence together.

Kokichi goes into one of the back rooms upstairs, pointing towards the small sort of walk in closet there. Rantaro locks the bedroom door behind them. The thought that this guy could be a serial killer enters his head for a second but is quickly quelled by Rantaro unzipping his jeans and shoving Kokichi into the closet.

The light in the closet is extremely dim, but bright enough that Kokichi can sort of see what he’s doing. His eyes will adjust to the light anyway. He had let out a super embarrassing noise at being pushed into the closet, one that made Rantaro chuckle. He doesn’t bother with kissing Kokichi, instead leaning down, grabbing Kokichi’s hair, and biting his neck hard.

Kokichi practically shrieks, slamming his eyes shut. He grabs onto Rantaro’s arm and digs his nails in, thankful he’s wearing a turtleneck and can easily hide whatever marks Rantaro makes. He feels Rantaro slide his hand down his head, down his hip, and fumble with the button of the shorts.

“Not a fan of taking it slow?” Kokichi asks, almost slyly.

“You don’t seem to be complaining. Get on your knees.” Rantaro steps back, satisfied with the mark he left.

Kokichi stumbles to the floor, already having guessed what’s going to happen. “If your dick tastes bad I won’t suck it.”

“If it’s bad you can bite it off,” He jokes, pulling his boxers down. Rantaro gives his dick a. wiggle? and pushes Kokichi’s head against the wall. Kokichi opens his mouth for him and Rantaro takes the opportunity to shove it in.

Kokichi gags a bit, slamming his eyes shut. One of his hands moves to the wall, while the other moves to Rantaro’s thigh as if it allows him any shred of control. Rantaro hisses, gripping Kokichi’s hair tight as he thrusts in and out at an almost brutal pace.

It takes a bit but Kokichi pushes Rantaro off, drool dripping down his chin while he tries to regain his breath. He looks up at Rantaro with tired eyes, and the other takes the time to stare down at him, his dick in his own hand as he jerks it right in Kokichi’s face. 

“You gonna get back to it?” Rantaro says impatiently, one of his knees buckling and a hand shooting out to support himself. 

“Ngh, yeah, gimme a sec.” Kokichi takes a second and grabs him with the hand that had been on the wall, knocking Rantaro’s own hand away. He licks up the head with basically zero coordination, covering his teeth with his lips as best as he can and swallowing around the dick in front of him.

Rantaro starts to thrust in and out, caring more about getting himself off than whether or not Kokichi could breathe. He can feel Kokichi’s throat flutter around him and he pulls back, only to shove himself back in Kokichi’s mouth after giving the other boy a short time to breathe. Kokichi whimpers around him, both of his hands having moved to Rantaro’s hips, nails digging in hard. 

“Fuck, I’ll give you head after this too, k?” Jesus he speaks like a fuckboy. Kokichi decides not to comment on it (as if he had a choice) and nods. The next few minutes are a blur, the most Kokichi feels is when Rantaro cums down his throat. He gags, coughing up some of it on the floor and falling down.

Rantaro chuckles, breathing heavily. He kneels down and tilts Kokichi’s chin up. “Haven’t even touched you yet.” He grabs the waistband of Kokichi shorts and yanks them and his boxers down in one go, reaching down to grab at his ass a bit before running his hand along Kokichi’s crotch. “Get on your hands and knees.”

Kokichi obeys, crawling forward and looking back at Rantaro, who’s pulling his boxers back and zipping his pants up. Rantaro moves behind him and shoves his head down to the floor, a move Kokichi can barely register as happening until he’s face down on the carpet and the other man’s tongue is shoved inside of him.

There’s a sharp pain at Kokichi’s thigh a few seconds after Rantaro pulls away to breathe, but he’s too wrapped up in all that's happening to care. He hears Rantaro chuckle and drop something before going back to eating Kokichi out. It doesn’t take long for the smaller man to finish, hiding his face on the ground and shaking.

Rantaro pulls away, the smirk evident in the way he speaks. “You done?” He watches Kokichi nod, and he stands up, patting Kokichi’s ass before he just straight up leaves, closing the closet door behind him to give Kokichi privacy.

Kokichi groans, regaining his bearings. His stomach hurts, and he realizes that Rantaro is gone. Shit… he stumbles up, reaching for his boxers and shorts to put them back on. Something drips down his thigh and burns. He falls out of the closet into the fully lit bedroom, and sees blood. Gripped in full blown panic he turns the light on and sees a ragged heart with “RA” inside.


	6. Hangover

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kokichi wakes up from one hell of a hangover. Thankfully, his new friend Shuuichi offers to take care of him for a little bit.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hehe, two chapters in a day!
> 
> TWs: Vomit, Acid mention

Kokichi wakes up on the bathroom floor, neck and thigh hurting and the last night a blur. He winces as he stumbles up and awake, grabbing his head in pain. There’s unflushed vomit in the toilet next to him, so he flushed it and stands up. The small amount of blood has all crusted on his leg, and he grabs a ball of toilet paper so he can at least try to clean it with soap and water at the sink. The bathroom door’s been locked by him, so at least no one had been able to see it. He searches for his phone and finds that it’s not with him so he can’t check to see what time it is.

Once cleaned up he searches the bathroom for some bandages, finding some self adhering ones that Tsumugi uses for cosplay. He wraps his leg up with that and some toilet paper and sighs. Well, that’s not the weirdest thing that’s happened to him, even if he doesn’t really like it. The hickey on his neck is extremely dark, so he puts a large bandaid over it to cover it up. His chest burns horribly from sleeping in his binder, but he can’t bring himself to take it off. Not until he can go to Tsumugi’s bedroom and find his normal clothes. He can just hunch over with his hoodie on then.

He exits the bathroom, trying to remember his way around Tsumugi’s house. Daylight shines through the window, so he knows that he wasn’t out for just an hour or so. Kokichi makes his way to Tsumugi’s room, limping. He finds Tsumugi dead asleep in her bed. Of course she would be there, Tsumugi would never crash on the floor of her own house when she has the comfort of her own bed. He grabs his clothes and makes his way back to the bathroom to change so he can go find his phone and leave.

“Where the fuck is it…” He grunts, picking at acne on his forehead in annoyance. He already searched his clothes and the room he and Rantaro were in to no avail. Kokichi slinks downstairs, trying not to make his presence known.

On the floor are Kaede and Miu, passed out and snoring. Gonta is sleeping on the couch, wrapped up in a blanket. Rantaro is nowhere to be seen, but what Kokichi does find is his phone on the counter, hopefully untouched. What he finds are a few joking selfies that Kaede and Shuuichi took together (thankfully not enough to spam) and a picture of a phone number written down. He figures that it’s Rantaro’s so he puts it in his contact list for the hell of it. He’s about halfway through typing a rude message about the mark Rantaro left when someone steps into the kitchen.

“Oh! Ouma-kun, you’re up! Where were you? I got worried and we tried to look for you but we couldn’t find you…” Shuuichi bounces up to him, wiping his slightly tired eyes. It seems he’s woken up before anyone else. The time on the clock reads noon, but Kokichi knows that when he gets home he’s going to sleep the rest of the day.

Kokichi raises an eyebrow. “You were worried?”

Shuuichi rubs the back of his head, looking to the side. “A- a bit, yeah. I know I don’t really know you but I didn’t think you’d just disappear after going off with Rantaro.”

Shit, people saw that. “What happened after that?”

“Um, Rantaro came back alone and brought out acid for all of us. Shirogane-san went to bed, Akamatsu-san made Iruma-san take a tab, and I got one too. Gonta tried to stay up to babysit but he fell asleep about an hour after that. The girls just fell asleep, but I’m still up. We watched a few movies and Akamatsu-san had us all do, uh, Tik Tok dances. Rantaro left an hour or so ago in an Uber, but he didn’t leave any extra tabs if you had wanted one...” Shuuichi rambles on, and Kokichi’s glad that nothing big happened other than his disappearance.

Kokichi rummages through the cabinet while he speaks, pulling out ibuprofen and some snacks to cure his awful hangover. “I don’t do acid, so it doesn’t matter too much to me. I uh, crashed in a bathroom after throwing up and only woke up a few minutes ago.”

“That’s not good… can I get you some tea?” Shuuichi asks, clasping his hands together and fidgeting.

“Yeah, that would be nice.” Kokichi dry swallows the painkillers and takes a bite from his snack, watching Shuuichi put a pot on the stove. He decides to finish his rude text to Rantaro later and sits on the counter, closing his eyes and resting his head on the cabinets.

Shuuichi wrings his hands together, a bead of sweat running down his cheek. “If you wanted to, you could lie down in the guest bed and I could make you breakfast. It’s no problem, I’d be happy to do it for you..!”

Kokichi’s a bit weary of the offer, but wow he really thinks he needs it. He grunts and gets up from the counter. “That would be great, actually. Thanks, Saihara.” He flashes Shuuichi a small, exhausted smile, and the other boy’s face lights up fast.

“H-here, do you wanna lean on me Ouma-kun?” 

Shuuichi offers his hand, but Kokichi doesn’t take it, continuing to walk. “I’m good, I’ll be in the room at the end of this hall.”

He falls onto the bed and immediately huddles under the covers and buries his head under the pillow. Ugh, sunlight. And any other light. It helps his headache a bit, but not as much as he wants. The fact that he’s lying on the bed that Tsumugi does her lewd shoots on makes him kind of grossed out but the sheets are soft and the bed is comfy, so he tries not to let it bother him. Kokichi runs his hand along the bandages on his thigh and furls his lip. He had noticed the pain at the time and assumed Rantaro was just scratching him in his drunken stupor, which was something that Kokichi wouldn’t have really minded. It pisses him off but there’s not much he can do about it.

Time passes and Kokichi almost falls asleep again, but is woken up by the sound of the door opening. He slowly brings his head out from under the covers, blinking a few times and seeing that it’s just Shuuichi with some soup and tea. Kokichi sits up, grunting, and he sets the pillow up on the headrest so he can lie back against it.

“I brought you some soup too, I hope that’s okay.” Shuuichi flashes him a bright smile, sitting down on the bed. He’s got a tray in his hand with two bowls, two cups, and a teapot. The tray gets put down on Kokichi’s lap.

“Thanks.” Kokichi grabs the tea and pours it for both of them, setting the pot down and blowing on his tea to cool it down. “But uh, why are you doing this? You didn’t have to.”

Shuuichi smiles. On a closer look he’s wearing the same eyeliner from the night before, but his lipstick has been reapplied recently. Probably keeps a tube in his pocket. “I usually try to do nice things for my friends if they don’t feel good. Er- I hope that’s okay, if we’re friends. Can we…?”

The awkwardness of the question could be seen from a mile away. Kokichi shrugs, not really caring if someone calls him a friend or not. “Be friends?” He sips his tea, and sets the cup down. “I don’t see why not.”

A smile lights up Shuuichi’s face, as well as a bright red blush. Though, Kokichi thinks he might have rosacea or a sweating problem or something. “Thank you, Ouma-kun! Didn’t think you would want to be friends with someone like me… uh, I hope your headache gets better! I can get you a cold towel if you want, or I can close the blinds, or-”

“Closing the blinds would be nice, but uh, that’s it.” Kokichi starts drinking his tea so he doesn’t have to say anything else. Shuuichi gets up from his spot and closes the blinds, coming back and grabbing his own cup of tea. They sit in silence for a bit, and Kokichi appreciates it. The pain in his body gets a bit better eventually, though his dizzy head and weakened body remind him that he needs to eat.

Kokichi finishes his tea and starts eating the soup, now even more thankful that Shuuichi brought it for him. He can feel the other boy’s eyes on him and is a little creeped out, but when he turns to Shuuichi the other boy looks away almost immediately.

“You’re staring at me.”

Shuuichi sips his tea and looks to the side. “Ah, sorry, I was just spacing out. Guess my eyes were pointed in your direction.”

Kokichi doesn’t fully believe it, but he doesn’t push it. He knows that he sometimes spaces out and accidentally looks at people. But if it continues to happen, he’ll probably question it. Kokichi finishes his soup pretty quickly and sets the empty bowl on the tray so he can lie back against the headrest.

“What happened to your neck? That bandaid wasn’t there when we were with Hoshi-kun the other day.” Shuuichi points at it and seems to reach for it for a second before pulling away, remembering that Kokichi doesn’t like to be touched.

“None of your business,” He spits out, too harsh for Shuuichi’s sweet tone. The other boy starts to apologize immediately, wringing his hands together in nervousness. Kokichi bites his lip, feeling a bit bad. “Ah, uh, I just didn’t want to talk about it.”

Shuuichi nods and picks up his own soup bowl, finally going to eat it. The two are silent for a while, the tension in the room thick enough that it would have to be cut with a metaphorical knife. Eventually Kokichi gets up, wanting to go home. 

“I’m gonna go home, thanks again for breakfast,” Kokichi says, waving goodbye to Shuuichi. The other boy gives him a little wave and a smile on his way out.

When Kokichi gets home he decides to complete his text to Rantaro.

_“thx for cutting me up and leaving your number on my phone after fucking me u weirdo"_

_"and for leaving me to vomit in the bathroom"_

_"saihara told me what happened after so dont even try to lie n defend urself”_

Yeah, that works. It conveys his anger well enough and gets across the message that he would block Rantaro if he says the wrong thing. Kokichi goes to do his own thing for a bit. His phone doesn’t have a ringer on for anyone but his Dad, because he knows if he doesn’t answer his Dad he risks getting yelled at, so it’s about 15 minutes until he sees the reply.

_“Ouma-kun? This is shuuichi i probably should have put my name on the number haha gonta told me to leave it. What are you talking about?”_

Shit.


	7. Butterfly knife

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A run in with Kaede is never fun. Kokichi says just enough to piss her right off, leaving him stuck in a classroom bleeding out. Aid comes in the form of a prefect, Korekiyo, but Korekiyo is also a major prick.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TWs: Cocaine mention, Fighting, Knife fight, Blood

It’s been a few days since the party happened. Kokichi and Shuuichi had been texting a little bit- Kokichi had just tried to move the conversation away from the first text he sent, and was somewhat successful in it. Shuuichi had been able to deduce that it was Rantaro and in his panic Kokichi started sending pictures of his mom’s cat, which eventually had the topic moved to pets.

Kokichi finds himself in a classroom after school, no teacher in sight. He's catching up on missed work after having taken the first day back off, not feeling like being around anyone. He never quite reveals why he's gone from school about once a week to other people. He just pulls a sad face and teachers give him his missed work most of the time. One of them even wants him to tutor, and Kokichi’s almost considering it if it didn’t mean interacting with another being.

The door to the classroom swings open and a disgruntled Kaede walks in. She’s always looking for a quiet place to herself, and it appears she’s found it. With Kokichi sitting quietly in the back of the room, she really doesn’t notice him at first, or at least doesn’t appear to. With her back to Kokichi, she digs through her backpack for a few minutes, growing increasingly frustrated.

A few minutes of... peace? That's a lie, Kokichi is practically shaking at this point. Being alone in a room with Kaede sounds like the last thing he wants to do. She constantly smells like cigarettes, and rarely showers. Dry shampoo is Kaede’s savior. Kokichi mutters to himself, a bit louder than he thought he was speaking.

"Geez she fuckin reeks."

Kaede’s head snaps back towards him, appearing even slightly startled. She sneers at him. “Didn’t see you there, freak,” She spits, ignoring his comment on her smell. The first fight the two of them got into was when Kokichi said she smelled like ass and she slammed his head against a locker.

"Of course you didn't. You could've snorted coke in here and still not have noticed me." He grumbles and looks back down at his work, just trying to be able to get some of it done. Normally, leaving sounds good, but Kokichi doesn’t want Kaede to think that she can win that easily. A jab at a rumor might make her want to leave.

She whips her head around to face him, her brief shocked expression quickly dropping into a darker one. “How the fuck do you know about that?”

Kaede’s simultaneously in attack and defense mode, and she bristles like a cat before it pounces, scooting her chair out from under the desk so she has easy access to get up and probably beat the shit out of him or something. She can’t even make a fist with her acrylics but Kokichi’s been on the receiving end of a scratch and it’s not fun.

Kokichi shrinks, dropping his pencil and stammering out his reply. Well, he didn’t know for sure, but she just confirmed it. "I keep seeing you wiping your nose on your hand and sometimes there's blood. With a personality like yours how could I Not think you were doing some shit like that."

Kaede’s eyes narrow and she grits her teeth. She’s glaring daggers at Kokichi as she slowly stands up and places her hands on her hips, taking a step towards him. Her voice is low and dangerous. “Better start minding your own business, Ouma. You could get yourself in trouble if you mess with the wrong people.”

Kokichi looks to the side, then back at her, staring right into Kaede's eyes. He remembers the advice that was told to him: ‘Don't watch someone's hands or legs, watch their eyes. You can predict their next move from that.’ It’s pretty solid advice. "I-" He chokes on his words slightly. "I'll keep that in mind."

“That’s nice. I think an apology is in order, hmm? I don’t like it when people spy on me.” She smiles, a sweet one, until you look at her eyes. Something was burning inside her. “Go on! Beg for my forgiveness.” She clasps her hands together and puts her foot on the desk Kokichi’s sitting in, seemingly preparing to kick it over.

"What."

Kokichi steps back and gets up out of his chair, reaching for his bag and preparing to attempt to run. He’s NOT going to apologize to Kaede of all people. He hopes that he misheard her. This could get bad... He eyes the exit and tries to prepare an escape route.

Kaede seems to see his eyes darting across the room and the adrenaline starts pumping. Being closer to the door than he is, she kicks a nearby desk over, sending it crashing to the floor in front of the closed door. Kokichi would have to waste time moving it to make his escape. The school is pretty much empty anyways at this point, it doesn’t seem like she cares about making a bunch of noise. She looks at Kokichi, the way a wolf looks at a rabbit.

“You heard me. Does it look like I’m joking, dweeb? Now beg.”

He takes a shaky step back and looks back at Kaede. He briefly tries and fails to come up with another plan. Window? No, can’t get out quick enough. Distraction and escaping past Kaede? Maybe, but would she fall for it or get angrier? Kokichi wants to get out of this in the least humiliating way he possibly can. He gulps and balls one of his hands in a fist. ".... No. I don't want to."

Her smile drops. Kokichi’s never been a full blown pushover. Kaede absolutely hates that about him, but it makes her try to find new ways to make him submit. Her heart beats faster and her nose wrinkles. As scared as Kokichi looks, he’s trying to hold his ground. He never wants to submit to anyone, ever.

“Aw. That’s a shame. I thought someone like you wouldn’t wanna do this the hard way.” Her expression is eerily calm as she swiftly strides towards him, snatching his collar before he has a chance to react. She pulls him towards her roughly, smirking. “You’ve really been getting on my nerves recently, yknow that? All your snide comments you don’t think I hear.”

"What the fuck are you-!?" Kokichi's hands immediately going to claw at Kaede's arm to try and get her to let go. He stumbles forward, not able to physically resist her pull. 

Kaede lifts up the hem of her shirt a little and with a flash of chrome a small butterfly knife is pulled from her waistband. Did she always have that thing? Who knows, but Kokichi isn’t surprised she has one. His eyes flicker towards the knife in fear. For now she was just twirling it around in her spare hand, each spin causing Kokichi’s heart to beat faster.

He screams, loud, hoping that anyone would hear.

It looks like Kaede didn’t expect him to scream. Unfortunately, the school is big and the likeliness of someone actually hearing him is small. Panic briefly flashes across her face and she instinctively tightens her grip on Kokichi’s collar, lifting him up just a little bit so they’re eye to eye, just the tips of his shoes on the floor scrabbling about to no avail. She stops twirling her knife and presses it ever so slightly against Kokichi’s cheek.

“Don’t scream and don’t change the subject. You got yourself into this, brat. You’re always up my ass and I’m sick of it. Now, apologize.”

Kokichi shuts his mouth and practically growls at her, redoubling his efforts to try and get out. He doesn't even seem concerned for his uniform or anything, more concerned with just getting out.

"I'm sorry- I'm sorry just let me go you bitch!" He kicks out on instinct and drives his nails hard into Kaede's wrist, making her grimace. Yup, first big fight in a while. Kokichi can't say he missed getting his ass kicked or anything. But he figured with his irritating personality it would just be a matter of time that someone would get sick of him. A few tears streak down his face, and he feels horrified that someone like Kaede is watching him do something as weak as crying.

Kaede is no stranger to fights, and she’s much stronger than Kokichi, so she barely flinches at the kick to the shin. She notices that he’s crying, and bursts out into laughter. “Are you- are you seriously crying? God! You’re pathetic.”

She presses her blade just a little harder against his cheek, just barely slicing the skin open, before looking down the rest of his body. The knife moves down, trailing along the fabric of his uniform until it meets his thigh. She cuts a long slice down and drops the smaller boy, pushing him backwards. Nothing deep enough that it would need stitches, but it barely teeters the line.

Kokichi hits the floor, knocking over a chair with a groan. Kokichi grips his leg and looks up at Kaede with a sneer. Anger fills every inch of his body. He shakes, but makes himself appear like even smaller of a target. Maybe Kaede will go away if he stays put. Maybe she'll get bored of him and leave. Kokichi thinks about how he's gonna have to sew up the fabric later. He spits out what he hopes is the last response, "Shut up."

Well, Kaede was actually going to turn and leave, but she decides to revel in her victory for a little longer. She towers over him and tilts his chin up with her foot, and it looks like she’s... enjoying this? That’s so gross.

“No, I’m not going to shut up. You’re not really in a position to tell me what to do- you know I could rock your shit if I got serious. And besides, who are you gonna snitch to? I know damn well you have no friends. No one will believe or care about a nobody like you.” She spits out the words like venom, and she smiles to herself.

Kokichi opens his mouth, closes it, and opens it again, just trying to come up with a response. He knows that what she said is true. The only person who he could tell would be Tenko or Ryoma and... he doesn't want to get either one involved. It's not worth it.

"You're really as much of a freak as everyone thinks you are, huh."

Kaede flinches a little at his comment, but actually doesn’t refute it. Instead, she chuckles to herself and lightly runs the tip of her well manicured finger along the edge of her knife, getting just a smidge of blood on her skin. She examines it as she talks. “I guess so! But few people have the pleasure of getting a one-on-one convo with me like we’re having.”

"I wouldn't call it a pleasure." He spits out, having almost gagged at the sight of his own blood on the knife. "Are you going to leave now or what? I'm sick of you."

“All this and you still got an attitude? Bold!” She walks towards him again, with a bubbly spring in her step. Kaede never seems this happy usually- it’s like a switch was flipped as soon as things started getting violent. She leans over Kokichi menacingly and her voice drops to a raspy whisper.

“Test my patience again? And I’ll fucking kill you.”

After that, Kaede spins around with a grin and starts walking towards the door, quickly hauling the desk out of the way of the door. “Nice chat Ouma! See you at school tomorrow!” She swings open the door and wipes her fingers on her skirt, tucking her knife into her waistband again. And with that, Kaede disappeared as quickly as she came.

Kokichi stays stiff until Kaede exits the classroom. He grits his teeth and snarls, raising his fists and repeatedly punching anything he can get his hands on- the floor, the chair near him, anything. It doesn't last long and he quickly gets up and packs his papers up with no regard for how the papers may wrinkle. Instead of leaving, Kokichi just sinks to the floor and curls into a ball for a bit. He can stay until he's sure Kaede is gone for good and that he won't run into her again.

First thing on Kokichi's to-do-list after he finishes sulking is to find somewhere he can wrap this up and hide it. Can't go home like this. Second thing is to absolutely avoid Kaede at all costs from now on. Sure, he was already doing it, but now he's redoubling his efforts. Being a human punching bag isn't actually fun.

He looks around and determines that no one is coming. Good, he guesses. Kokichi grabs his pants and takes them off, trying not to touch the long slice down his leg. He thinks it’s sterile enough right now that it might not get infected if he goes and disinfects it as soon as he gets home, but then there’s the problem of actually getting there. The marks Rantaro made are on the inside of his other thigh, so he guesses that it’s evened out now.

Kokichi grabs his phone, texting his Dad and telling him that he got another ride home. It’s a lie, but Kokichi thinks he might be able to mooch a ride off of someone at least. And if he absolutely has to, then he can scrounge up change for public transportation. He eye’s Shuuichi’s messages. Maybe he can see if Shuuichi can give him a ride or something…?

_“are u still at school”_

Yeah, that’s ominous enough that it could work. Shuuichi starts typing immediately.

_“No why do you ask?”_

Shit, that blows. Kokichi sighs and slams his head on the wall. He grunts and searches through his backpack for anything he could possibly use for this. There’s a spare jacket that could work for something maybe, he guesses. He presses it to the cut hard to stop the bleeding.

Click.. Click… Click… Someone’s footsteps sound down the hallway, and Kokichi groans, putting the jacket over his boxers just in case whoever that is enters.

“Who is in there? I heard your groan. You are not supposed to be in an empty classroom without a teacher and permission.”

Kokichi looks up, locking eyes with one of his grade’s prefects. He shrinks a bit under his harsh gaze. Korekiyo Shinguuji was one of his classmates who had a disdain for literally everyone, especially the 1st year girls who would follow him around trying to ‘subtly’ get him to like them. Kokichi recognizes him immediately from his black mask and long, grey-blue hair.

“Dunno if you’re blind but I can’t exactly walk much right now unless I want to trail blood everywhere,” Kokichi spits out.

Korekiyo looks down and his eyes close, one hand moving up towards his mouth in disdain. He clicks his tongue and turns on his heel, though he just stays in the doorway. “And what do you expect me to do, call an ambulance? The police? Your options are thin…. What was your name again…?”

“Kokichi Ouma and I never told it to you in the first place. If you aren’t going to get me shit from the nurse’s office then just mind your fucking business.” He winces upon moving his leg to get in a more comfortable position. He watches Korekiyo leave and groans, wishing that almost anyone but that prick would have been the one to find him here. Kokichi closes his eyes, letting his exhaustion grab ahold of him for now.

“Do not think that I am doing this because I care, Ouma-san.”

Something light hits him in the stomach and Kokichi’s eyes shoot open. He watches Korekiyo leave once more, and sees what was thrown at him. A package of gauze, some self adhering bandages, and a packet of antibiotic cream. Did he really go to the nurse’s office and grab these for him like Kokichi said? Kokichi’s not going to question it, immediately going to dress the cut so he can put his pants back on and try to leave.

He looks up to thank Korekiyo, but he realizes that the other man isn’t coming back. Oh well, it’s not crucial for him to thank the guy. Kokichi gets up, eyes closing shut tight when he puts weight on his leg. It shouldn’t hurt for too too long, and besides Kokichi needs to see about getting home or somewhere. The last thing he actually wants to do is go home and deal with his Dad though.

Kokichi checks his phone to see a few messages from Shuuichi.


	8. McDonalds I

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Gonta, Shuuichi, and Kokichi all go to McDonalds, just for fun.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TWs: NSFW jokes

_“Did something happen?”_

_“Do you need a ride?”_

_“Or did you just want to hang out haha sorry I get paranoid sometimes”_

Looks like he last texted Kokichi about a minute ago, but the messages were spread out. Kokichi supposes it wouldn’t hurt to ask for a ride. Hell, maybe he can mooch off a night at wherever Shuuichi lives. Time to get his persuasive lying text game on.

_“yeah im stuck at school my parents r on a business trip they left today n i forgot”_

It’s always easier to lie over text. No having to worry about your expression, and you can think of it not on the spot. He figures that he can keep up a lie about having both of his parents in one home too, it’s not like he’s going to let Shuuichi know where he lives even if Shuuichi is going to drop him off instead of letting him stay. 

_“Oh no I could drive you home if you want ouma-kun”_

Shuuichi types for a while. Kokichi just watches the typing bubble appear and disappear and reappear, until Shuuichi finally sends what he was typing.

_“Or you could come and watch danganronpa with me i'm marathoning super danganronpa 2 right now it's one of my favorites!”_

Okay, that works. Kokichi bites his pride and lies again in his next messages. 

_“sure i love that season"_

_"meet u at the front?”_

Technically Kokichi could just be truthful and say he’s never watched Danganronpa. And he could be even MORE truthful and say that he absolutely hates it. But something inside of him almost wishes to.. impress? Shuuichi, or at least get on his good side.

_“I'll be there in 15 minutes!”_

Fifteen minutes sounds good. Not too long but it gives Kokichi enough time to make his way to the front. He makes his way over, trying not to wince while he’s walking, though there’s a slight limp to his step. No one bothers him thankfully, and he makes it to the front of the school without interruption with a few minutes to spare.

Kokichi sighs in relief when he sits down at a bench. He pulls out his phone and hunches over, wondering when he’s going to get a text from Shuuichi. A car starts to pull up and Kokichi doesn’t think much about it, until it starts honking a bunch. He jumps and looks up, squinting at the driver and finding that it’s none other than Gonta Gokuhara at the wheel. Gonta rolls the window down, and in the passenger seat is Shuuichi.

“Hey loser, get in we’re going to McDonalds!”

Ugh. Kokichi groans, though there’s a small smile peeking through when he rolls his eyes. He stands up and walks slowly to the back seat, getting into the car. “Didn’t know you’d be here, Gokuhara. What’s this about McDonalds?”

Shuuichi smiles at him and tries to speak, but Gonta turns around to face Kokichi fully and interrupts the other friend. “Shuuichi thought you might want to get yourself like, an iced coffee or whatever. He’s paying but he wanted me as a wingman and I wanted to drive his car.”

“Aha.. hey, I never said wingman.” Shuuichi looks to the side, like he’s lying, which he is. Gonta opens his mouth to speak and Shuuichi smacks his hand over his friend's mouth. “I thought it’d be nice since your parents are outta town. And Gonta was already with me.” Gonta tries to speak but gives up quickly. “Boy’s night at McDonald’s sounds good, right?”

Kokichi blinks a few times. He really doesn’t understand what’s going on, but it sure does seem weird. He laughs awkwardly and nods, strapping himself in the back seat with his backpack at his feet. “Yeah. Boy’s night.”

Gonta whoops and drives, probably only obeying about 90% of street laws. The car is nice, but not spotless. There’s a few empty cigarette containers in the back, along with some empty beer bottles and a paper bag from a fast food restaraunt. Kokichi looks up at the two, who are whispering to each other. Kokichi tries to catch what they’re saying over the MCR music blasting. While this is written in english, Kokichi is very much japanese and cannot understand what the hell is being said. Honestly, Shuuichi and Gonta probably can only vaguely understand it too (they aren’t failing their english classes as bad as Kokichi is).

“Gonta, do you think he’ll like it? I really think I should have picked a nicer place...”

“Of course he’ll like it, if you asked alone for a fancy place it would totally be a weird date. Trust the Gonta instinct, Shuuichi. Normal people don’t go on dates to places like McDonalds or Waffle House so he won’t suspect a thing.”

He decides not to listen in anymore, mostly because he didn’t hear enough of it to understand what Gonta’s implying. Kokichi eyes the door, almost wanting to tuck and roll out of the car on impulse, but they enter the parking lot as he looks out the window. Gonta parks badly at first, but after a minute of reparking he’s finally within the spot margins. He goes outside the car to check and make sure.

Shuuichi turns to Kokichi, a smile on his face. “So, uh, the Danganronpa watching wasn’t a lie, Gonta just wanted me to eat because I didn’t get lunch yet. And if I said no he would’ve dragged me out here anyways without being able to get you too haha…”

So, for those of you confused on the general plot of what’s going on with Shuuichi, we can stray from Kokichi’s perspective for a bit. First, let’s go to the first time the two of them met. Shuuichi had texted Gonta, ‘Omg gonta I met the boy of my dreams today!’, which isn’t an uncommon thing. At Shirogane’s party, Kokichi wasn’t around long enough for Gonta to wingman. Now, let's skip to today, when Shuuichi had texted Kokichi about them watching Danganronpa together.

Yeah. This is taking more than one paragraph, but you GOTTA know for it to make sense. Shuuichi texted Gonta in a panic, wondering what to do, asking things like ‘should we go to a restaurant, should I make him dinner myself, should I-’ yadda yadda yadda. Gonta, who is a terrible wingman, told him that he should invite somewhere where the three of them can all go together, so that Kokichi doesn’t think that it’s a date. Shuuichi and Gonta often hang around at McDonald’s, so that’s the location Gonta suggested. Shuuichi, a total pushover who will do anything anyone says, agreed to Gonta’s frankly dumb suggestion. The lie that Shuuichi just told is something that actually happens, though.

“Oh. Well, that makes sense. Uh, do you know Tenko Chabashira? Sometimes she does that to me at lunch when I-” Don’t pack lunch because you don’t want to eat. “-forget my lunch.”

Gonta bangs on the window, laughing loud enough to be heard from inside. “Hey are you guys done making out so I can get some fuckin’ fries?”

Kokichi puts a hand to his mouth, face getting red at just the implication of it. He quickly grabs his bag and exits the car, giving Gonta a stubborn look. “We weren’t doing anything like that.”

“Yet.” Did Gonta just wink at Shuuichi? Kokichi rolls his eyes and steps inside, sitting at the first table he sees.

Shuuichi leans over the table, watching Gonta sit down across from Kokichi. “So, uh, what do you guys want? I’ll write it down so I can remember.” He pulls out his phone and takes both of their orders, skipping over to the counter.

Gonta twiddles his thumbs a bit at the table, Kokichi seeming comically small compared to the goliath of a man in front of him. “So, uh, Ouma.” He clears his throat. “Got a crush on anyone?”

“What.” Kokichi spits out, not expecting the question.

“So you DO have a crush on someone! Haha, don’t worry, big guys always keep secrets well!”

“No- what? I don’t like anyone, and isn’t asking about crushes something that girls do?” Kokichi wrinkles his nose, wondering who this guy thinks he is asking Kokichi about his ‘crush’.

Gonta rolls his eyes. “Who cares if it's something girls do. Tell me who you want to dick you down.”

“Hey it’s awful bold of you to assume-!” Kokichi squints at Gonta, interrupting his own speech. “What kind of fucking game are you playing.”

“Ohhh I get it, you play hard to get and don’t trust people with knowing who you like. Gotcha.” Gonta winks and points a finger gun at Kokichi.

Kokichi groans, folding his hands on the table and resting his head on them in annoyance. Seriously, where does this guy get off thinking he’s cool to just say these things! He waits for Shuuichi to come back with food, which doesn’t take too long. He takes a peek, seeing that Gonta and Shuuichi both got happy meals with some image of Hello Kitty on the side.

He sits up and watches Shuuichi sit down next to him and not Gonta, and wonders if something could go wrong.

Gonta looks up at Shuuichi and Kokichi with a sinister grin, hands on his Hello Kitty Happy Meal. “Now that you’re here… it begins.”

“What… begins…?” Kokichi doesn’t like that look on Gonta’s face. He turns to Shuuichi to see if the other man thinks that it’s weird too, but Shuuichi has a similar expression on his face as he holds his box in the same way.

“It’s time to free her.”

Gonta starts chanting, somewhat quiet at first. “Free her. Free her. Free her.” He bangs his fist on the table, causing Kokichi to jump slightly. It’s followed by another bang until Gonta’s banging his fists on the table in a rhythm that goes with his chanting. “FREE HER! FREE HER! FREE HER!”

Shuuichi begins chanting along with Gonta, though he doesn’t bang his hands on the table and is instead opening his box. “FREE HER! FREE HER! FREE HER!”

BANG! BANG! BANG! “FREE HER!!! FREE HER!!! FREE HER!!!!!!”

Kokichi immediately shrinks in on himself, looking around hoping to whatever entity out there that no one is staring at him and thinking he’s complicit in any of this. There’s less fear coming from the actual noise and more from possibly being kicked out of one of the only places that sells cheap food where he can go off his ass and get no weird looks. He starts panicking, and yells in annoyance, “The hell are you two doing?!”

The whole table is shaking as Gonta speeds up his banging to a constant pace. Shuuichi reaches into the box and pulls out a small, skeleton Hello Kitty figurine. Gonta pulls out his own, a more normal looking Hello Kitty figure.

The shaking and chanting ceases, and Gonta and Shuuichi both stare at Shuuichi’s figurine. Kokichi squints, trying to figure out what’s going on. Gonta is the first to speak up, eyes not leaving the toy. “Is that the one…?”

“The exact one I wanted… I must be Nagito kin shifting!” Shuuichi’s face is one of surprise, but it lights up almost immediately as he holds the toy up in excitement.

Kokichi lets out a loud breath of relief, and looks at the two boys weird. “Oh. You were talking about freeing a Hello Kitty toy.” He doesn’t bother questioning whatever the fuck Shuuichi just said. What on earth is kin. He had only ordered some nuggets and a soda, and he starts to nibble on his food, not very hungry.

“Please don’t talk about Komaeda when we’re trying to have a McDank’s bro date. PLEASE.” Gonta joke pleads Shuuichi, grabbing his shake and taking a loud obnoxious slurp. “Can we at least show Ouma how to properly eat fries before you talk about kinsex?”

This seems to fluster Shuuichi at least a bit, though whether or not it was due to the sexual comment or being berated by his best friend is ambiguous. He brushes some of his hair behind his ear and awkwardly laughs. “Aha, yeah, obviously.”

“Show me what?”

It seems like Gonta’s about to answer Kokichi’s question. He leans in, making direct eye contact with Kokichi as he aggressively shoves his fries and shake in between the two of them. “So. This is a really simple but EXTREMELY important process. If you do it correctly, you will be filled with the ecstasy of a full body orgasm. Can you handle it?”

“No.” It’s an honest answer.

“We can start slow then. No biggie. These are the perfect example fries, super hot and fresh. You may have one... ONE.” Gonta holds the container out towards Kokichi, who grabs one and just holds it in his fingers while he stares at Gonta with a confused look. Gonta licks his lips almost seductively. “Yeahhhhhhhh. Good, right? I fucking love fries.”

Kokichi cringes and hears Shuuichi say, “Uunnngh yeah fries baby.”

“Baby craves that sweet salty seed of god.” Gonta grins, grabbing his own bunch of fries out of the container like they were all the sword in the stone.

Shuuichi chuckles and grabs his own bunch. “Baby craves seed.”

Gonta practically howls with laughter and he takes the top off of the shake cup. “Gay. Shuuichi, you ready to share this moment? Daddy wants fries.”

Kokichi has no idea why he’s still here, or why he’s even still watching.

“Daddy want fries! It’s time for indulgence, Gonta.” Shuuichi giggles, looking over at Kokichi with a smile. Kokichi feels a bit welcome here, actually, despite how ridiculous everything is. Sadly he hasn’t gotten the context clues as to what they’re doing with the fries.

“I need to creampie my mouth with the sugary sweet semen of a salty potato cock right now.” Both Shuuichi and Gonta dip their bunches of fries in the milkshake after Gonta speaks. They quite literally shove them down their own throats, half laughing while they do so. Kokichi drops his singular fry and gags, putting a hand over his mouth and looking away. He can handle getting beaten to the point of bleeding and crying, but Kokichi draws the line at people dipping fries in milkshakes.

Gonta laughs at Kokichi gagging, but Shuuichi stops his laughing and looks concerned. “... Ouma-kun are you okay?”

Kokichi shoots both of them an angry look, finally pulling his hand away from his mouth and looking up. “Ew.”

“McDonald’s have me actin’ funny.” Gonta shoves more fries in his mouth, thankfully Not dipping them in his shake again. Kokichi is spared for now. At least, until Gonta speaks up again. “So were you having sex with Amami or did you really just lock yourself in that bathroom to sleep?”

Kokichi groans and slams his head on the table. Man, he really doesn’t want to talk about that. “Why do you care?”

“No lube and there was a few drops of blood and like, cum on the floor in the closet. And the texts you send Shuuichi. If you catch my drift.” Gonta speaks as if there was any needing to guess his ulterior motive. Kokichi knows that both of them were looking for him the night of the party, even remembering that Shuuichi had been nervous about where he went. And he remembers the texts he sent to Shuuichi thinking he was texting Rantaro’s number.

“Yeah I caught your dumb drift when you first entered the building. You have no shame do you.” Kokichi gives Gonta a dirty look, like he’s had enough of his antics. “You’re big and loud and stupid and all you talk about is ‘bro sex’.”

Anger seems to bubble up in Gonta. He grips the table with a bitter look on his face. Kokichi can see Shuuichi shift and can only guess that Shuuichi is trying to do something to calm him down. Kokichi does remember that Gonta said he was working on ‘being big and scary.’

Shuuichi’s answer to this is humor and something that he doesn’t think through before saying. “Ahah, hey, Ouma-kun might just not wanna talk about it! Remember the time you fingered me so hard my hymen broke and I didn’t wanna talk about it? You aren’t the most gentle guy in the world either Gonta.”

“Oh my GOD. SHUUICHI.” While it doesn’t make Gonta happy, it definitely makes him Not angry. It’s a bit hard to get angry when you are shoving your face in your hands. It seems like his own actual sexual experiences are where he draws the line. “WHY did you feel the need to share that.”

Kokichi’s holding his face in his hands too. “EW!”

“I regretted it as soon as I said it.” Shuuichi laughs awkwardly and puts his head in his hands as well, shutting the fuck up.

So, now we’ve got three dudes all with their heads in their hands.

Gonta is the first one to actually speak up again. “I. Listen. That was the only time. It was an accident.”

“New subject!! Aha……..” Shuuichi does something that seems a little bit like nervous jazz hands. He turns to Kokichi, putting his elbow on the table and resting his hand in his cheek. Kokichi would think that it was flirtatious if it wasn’t so awkward. (It was flirtatious actually :( ) “SO, Ouma-kun, what are you planning for Halloween?”

“Halloween..?” Kokichi thinks. He’s not sure what he has planned. Kokichi doesn’t usually do anything for Halloween, and instead buys candy the day after for cheap. “I don’t know yet. Shirogane might have a costume for me, but I wouldn’t really know what it is.”

“Oh. You do Halloween with Shirogane-chan? She vagueposted about me on kin this morning…” Shuuichi frowns and Gonta reaches over to pat his shoulder. 

Kokichi blinks twice. “I have no idea what that means.”

“Don’t worry about it. She’s a cunt.” Gonta shoots Shuuichi a slightly concerned look, but when Kokichi turns to see if Shuuichi is okay, the other boy just has his normal mindless smile on.

“... I think she wants me to hate you. She doesn’t want me to be friends with people she doesn’t like. But you guys are really nice….” Kokichi shoots them a small smile, a rare occurrence. “Shirogane is nice to me. She lets me do things with her and she even keeps food in her house for me. But-”

Before Kokichi can finish and talk about his uncertainty, Shuuichi interrupts him without meaning to. “One time I asked her for a popsicle and she put it in the microwave and made me drink the warm juice.”

“... Okay that’s kind of funny.” Kokichi chuckles twice. He looks at his cold food, and tries to swallow his nervousness. He didn’t think he actually wanted to finish the sentence that Shuuichi interrupted anyway.


	9. Shuuichi's Place

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Unable to back out of his lie of liking Danganronpa, Kokichi joins Shuuichi for a marathon at Shuuichi's house.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TWs: Transphobia mention

Their McDonald’s trip didn’t last much longer than that. Gonta ate the rest of Kokichi’s cold nuggets and they both finished their food. He went ahead and ushered them into Shuuichi’s car, making a comment about not wanting them to have sex in a McDonald’s bathroom, which didn’t sit too well with Kokichi.

“What kind of neighborhood do you live in?” Kokichi asks, eyeing the drastic change in housing as they drive. The houses get bigger and nicer, the neighborhoods look more friendly and costly. There’s no shrapnel bits or graffiti or signs that say “HAZARDOUS DO NOT ENTER” and even the apartment complexes look nice and somewhat bug-free.

“Oh, my house is just a minute or so away. My uncle isn’t home right now but he tends to pop up when you least want him to, haha.” Shuuichi jokes, though Kokichi doesn’t think it’s a joke.

“I’m banned from the house, especially when his uncle’s home.” Gonta parks in a nice looking driveway and opens his door up. “Which is fine by me, cuz I’m leaving after this. My house is like, two streets away. Don’t have too much fun without me, k?”

Shuuichi opens the car door and gets up, and Kokichi gets out as well and slings his backpack over his shoulder. He takes a look at the house, being that it’s a lot nicer and larger than any place Kokichi has lived. There’s not much to the outside- no large garden or decorations or anything of that sort. There’s a bush with no flowers and a small tree in the pristine yard. There are no other cars and all of the lights in the home are off except for one room on the inside. When Kokichi looks in that room, he sees countless bits of anime merchandise, so he determines that it must be Shuuichi’s room.

“Wait, you’re leaving?” Shuuichi asks, raising an eyebrow. There’s something desperate about the way he speaks.

Gonta laughs a bit and puts his hand on Shuuichi’s shoulder so he can whisper in his ear. He says, “Dude if you wanna get with this guy, you gotta do it without my expert help all the time. Freestyle it”, but Kokichi doesn’t hear him while he’s busy staring at Shuuichi’s house. Gonta starts jogging into the woods, and Shuuichi turns over to Kokichi and gulps nervously. 

“So! Aha, Ouma-kun, wanna come inside?” Shuuichi looks at him with big eyes, a crooked but innocent smile on his face. “We can watch Danganronpa on my TV, or whatever you want to do! I can, uh, drive you home if you don’t want to stay here though. Or, um, if you want to you can spend the night here since you have your school stuff....” Shuuichi murmurs a few things to himself that Shuuichi can’t pick up.

Absolutely not. Kokichi already didn’t want Shuuichi knowing where he lived. But now that he’s seen that Shuuichi lives in a nice house, he really doesn’t want Shuuchi seeing his dump of an apartment. “If I can wash my uniform here I’ll stay the night.”

Shuuichi seems to completely light up at that, grinning ear to ear. “Ah! Yeah, I can do that. You’re small so my stuff is all gonna be big on you, uh, since you’d need to borrow some of my clothes to sleep in. We can order takeout for dinner and either eat at the table or in my room, and we can fall asleep to watching unsolved crime documentaries together…” He seems distracted as he rambles, placing his hands together as his face gets more and more flushed.

“..Hello? Earth to Saihara?” Kokichi waves his hand in front of Shuuichi’s face.

He snaps out of it instantly, laughing awkwardly a bit on impulse and wringing his hands together. “Aha, sorry, I got distracted. Let’s go inside.”

Shuuichi leads Kokichi inside, opening up the door for him and turning the lights on while he slips his shoes off. He hadn’t changed after school before going to lunch (was it lunch? who knows) so they’re both still in school uniforms. Kokichi kicks his shoes off as well and surveys the inside of the house.

The inside of the house is just as boring and plain as the outside. Modern clean furniture and kitchen appliances and light grey walls is the basic vibe. There are a few photos up on the walls and little wall tables, but they all look like paid family portraits as opposed to pictures taken on vacations or birthday parties. It almost looks as if no one really ever touches this place.

“Sorry it’s so barren. I live here with my Uncle, and he’s not home a lot. My room is a lot more interesting.” Shuuichi grabs Kokichi’s hand without thinking, and starts to pull him up the stairs. Kokichi doesn’t respond, now only thinking about the hand on his own and trying not to trip while he makes his way upstairs.

Upstairs is less boring, but that’s only because of Shuuichi’s room and the bathroom. It’s also extremely cold- Kokichi takes a look at the thermostat and sees it set to 67, which is so much colder than Kokichi has ever seen one set to in any season other than winter. It looks like there’s a guest bedroom and small hallway bathroom, and the rest of the upstairs is devoted to a loft, Shuuichi’s room, and a large bathroom. The loft has a bunch of crime scene tape over the wall, as well as floodlights and a large ringlight. There are blackout curtains over the large window. Shuuichi’s room is open, and the two make their way in.

The bedroom is larger than any bedroom Kokichi’s ever really had or been in. Probably at least two times the size of his current one. In the middle of the room against a wall is a Queen size bed with stark black bedsheets and a comforter with a very comical image of a white haired anime boy in a green jacket. There’s a bodypillow of a girl with purple hair and a purple jacket on it sitting on one side of the bed, along with a large black and white bear plush. Hung up on the wall is another bodypillow cover but without the pillow of- is that Rantaro? Of course, Rantaro was a very popular contestant for his looks and bravery. Many shelves line the walls, all with figurines and wigs on wigheads. A transparent bag sits on the back of his desk chair, full of little keychains of the purple haired girl from before. Posters are plastered all over his walls, barely leaving anything showing, though there is a TV on the wall facing his bed. There are two dressers on either side of the room, and Shuuichi’s closet is open to show multiple full suits. There are some dirty clothes on the floor that Shuuichi kicks to the side upon entering. The walls in his room are a dark blue, and his black curtains are open to let some light in. He turns the ceiling light on when they enter.

“Oh, let me move that.” Shuuichi rushes to his bed, fixing the pillows and blanket and gently setting the bodypillow on the ground. He goes over to his dresser, mumbling to himself before pulling out two pairs of PJ pants and two generic t shirts. “Here, you can keep them if you want! You can change in the bathroom first.”

Kokichi stares at them, then at the dresser. No… just a t-shirt won’t do. Kokichi really doesn’t want to have to sleep in his binder. “Do you have any sweatshirts? I get cold easily.” It works well as a lie because it’s not entirely one. It’s balls freezing cold in Shuuichi’s room, probably due to his sweating issues.

“Yeah, I can get you one. Gimme a sec,” Shuuichi says, now going back in his dresser and searching for a sweatshirt. He comes out with one with the face of the bear on his bed on the front, and hands it to Kokichi. “Here you go, it's a really soft one I got limited edition. There’s even cute little bear ears on the hood…. Oh, and those thumb holes that are really nice!”

The sweatshirt is taken by Kokichi with a small thanks. He takes his pile of clothes and scoots on over to the bathroom to change. The bathroom is somewhat messy, with makeup all over the counter and some dirty clothes on the floor. Kokichi just kicks those to the side. He locks the door and yanks his pants down, gingerly unwrapping his leg. Now that he’s in a bathroom, he can clean it out with soap and water. He moves some of the stuff off the counter and quickly and lightly scrubs at it with whatever unscented soap he could find before wrapping it back up. He changes into the clothes Shuuichi gave to him and exits.

Shuuichi’s already changed. Seems he did it when Kokichi was in the bathroom. “If you hand me your uniform, I can go put it in the washing machine for you. You can get comfy on the bed while I go do that.” Kokichi hands him his dirty uniform, wishing he had gone and sewn up the large cut in it, but thinking that Shuuichi wouldn’t notice.

While Shuuichi’s off, Kokichi decides to take the time and look around his room some more. He looks in the drawers of the other dresser, finding that one is for Shuuichi’s normal clothes while the other is filled with costumes, accessories, and bagged wigs. He looks at the desk, seeing a pretty nice laptop, a ton of pill bottles, and a bunch of hot glue sticks everywhere. Nothing suspicious, though Kokichi didn’t think there’d be anything actually suspicious. He hears Shuuichi’s footsteps and tiptoes back over to the bed and sits down.

“Hey Ouma-kun, what was that big bloody rip in your pants?”

Shit.

Quick, think of something! “I snagged it on a wire when I was with Hoshi after school. I was able to sneak into the nurse’s office and clean it up though.”

That seems to work for Shuuichi, who sits down next to Kokichi and grabs a remote from his bedside table, turning the TV on. “That doesn’t sound too fun. Hey, I wonder if Hajime will come up here and snuggle with us while his namesake is on TV!”

Kokichi wracks his brain for whoever the fuck Hajime is, and remembers that its Shuuichi’s pet cat. “That would be really nice, he looks really fluffy.”

Shuuichi selects something from the TV, and hits play. Kokichi doesn’t know how much he actually wants to watch this. At least he can just pretend like nothing is playing. Maybe he can get away with being on his phone the whole time. He fidgets with the sleeves of the sweatshirt, pulling his thumbs through the holes and leaning back on a pillow against the headrest. He and Shuuichi are about a foot away from each other, both on either side of the bed. Shuuichi is hugging the small Monokuma plush on his bed, intently watching the TV screen.

Within the next few hours Kokichi finds himself looking up at the screen only on occasion. He knows that these are real people, technically. The actual footage of the real killing games were all substituted for animated versions and voice actors, but the deaths and ‘characters’ remain the same. And he knows about the Great Tragedy. These people.. These are people he learned about in the required class on it. This is the death game they were forced to participate in. Kokichi knows that some of these people are still alive today, but he honestly wasn’t able to memorize their names or appearances, especially in the animated media they were put in. It… makes him almost sick.

After the world started to be cleaned up, these death games continued underground for a while and were popular among people who were still living through the trauma of the despair that happened to the world. Eventually they became more of a game show. There are fans who denounce the first games with real deaths, and there are superfans who love the real games and say you aren’t a true fan if you don’t watch the first ones. There are even some who have the actual footage of the killing games, but it’s illegal to show those for profit. It’s so normalized in the culture of the society that not many people really think it's wrong. The protest movements are insanely unpopular.

Kokichi’s opinion was influenced by that of his father, and it's the only thing he can actually find himself agreeing with him on. Kokichi doesn’t like death. He doesn’t like violence. He hates that it’s made into a game for fun, even if people aren’t really getting physically hurt anymore. Kokichi’s not the type to join in on the protests outside of the Team Danganronpa HQ, mostly because the protestors are the very religious type who hate people like him. At one point in time he used to dream about ending the killing games.

“..Ouma-kun, are you awake?”

There are hands on his shoulders and Kokichi wakes up fast, jerking away from them. He blinks a few times, a hand coming up to rub the sleep out of his eyes. It seems the exhaustion of today set in and he took a nap. “Mng… did I fall asleep?

Shuuichi nods, smiling a bit. A bead of sweat rolls down his forehead. And still he won’t take that dumb hat off. “Yeah, you started leaning on me, it was really cute... I let you sleep for a while, but I figured since it’s about 8 we should order something to eat. There’s not much in the house but there’s a lot of places that offer delivery here.”

Kokichi stares at him, though not in a bad way. He wishes Shuuichi wasn’t always wearing that dumb hat. Kokichi hates men who wear hats like that, but that’s his own personal bias from experience. But he knows that Shuuichi is kind of a pervert and isn’t one for eye contact. Still, he looks into Shuuichi’s eyes for the brief moment that the other will let him, mind set to memorizing the light gold color and the shape of his long lashes in Kokichi’s half-asleep stupor. Shuuichi looks soft- there’s no harsh angles to the shape of his nose or cheeks or anywhere but his eyeliner. Kokichi wonders if he’d look weird without it.

He’s snapped out of his brief thoughts by a mrrrrrp from the side of the bed, and the sound of something hopping up. Kokichi turns around, seeing a large fluffy brown cat approaching them. The smile on his face grows. What was the cat's name again..? Hajime?

“Oh! Hajime!” Shuuichi turns away from Kokichi, sticking his hand out to his cat. The cat waddles on towards them and when it’s close enough Shuuichi grabs it, now holding Hajime in his arms. “Here, you can pet him Ouma-kun! He can be feisty sometimes but you can also do pretty much anything to him and he won't bite or scratch.”

Kokichi reaches forward with both hands, letting the cat sniff him first and watching Hajime rub against his hands. He smiles wide and scritches his chin and runs his fingers through Hajime’s fur. “He’s so fluffy. I don’t think I’ve actually ever seen a cat this fluffy in real life.”

“He’s fat too,” Shuuichi laughs, letting go of the cat when it started squirming in his grip. “C’mon, let's order some dinner.”

Dinner arrives within the hour, and the rest of their time was spent chasing after Hajime the cat through the large house. Big guy likes to play coy, and apparently loves being chased to the point where if you ignore him he’ll get sad, but if you try to chase him he’ll run and try to make you chase him more.

They eat on the dining room table, something Kokichi’s not used to in the slightest. Even when his family was together they never ate at a table or together at all really. Sometimes they would get takeout and eat it on the couch in front of the TV but that was rare. It was more every man for himself than ‘let’s eat together as a family’.

“Oh hey, they put cherry tomatoes in here.” Shuuichi takes a bite of his food, just mindlessly talking to fill the void of silence.

“Cherry tomatoes? I used to eat those for dinner actually,” Kokichi says casually, almost like he’s getting ready to make a joke. “My Dad would bring home a can and go ‘Hey kid, guess what we’re having for dinner?’ and I would go ‘Aw yeah Dad, tomatoes for dinner!’ and we’d all have that one jar like it was the best thing ever.”

Shuuichi looks at him with concern. “You used to only eat canned tomatoes for dinner and you were excited about it?”

…….. It seems like the joke didn’t hit well. “Aha.. uh…. Yeah. I had a fun childhood.”

“My parents dumped me on my Uncle when I was a kid. They have a more hands-off approach which means I see them once a year and they pay for my medical bills. My Uncle is uh...” Shuuichi plays with his food absentmindedly. “He’s a TV doctor. Which is why he’s also not home that much. You don’t really want to be around him. He doesn’t like my friends and makes fun of me a lot. Let’s see… My Grandma thinks I’m going to hell. I actually have the letter she sent me when I transitioned framed in my room because it’s funny.”

Oh, so he’s the kind of guy who will spill his entire past to anyone who lets him. “I don’t have anything going on in my life like that. I just have a normal family. I do work a part time job though. I don’t have too many hours but I try to come in when I can since it’s within biking distance.”

“I don’t have a job yet. I’m planning to audition for next year’s season on Danganronpa! I wanted to audition last year but you have to be over the age of 18 and my birthday was after the audition date. If I don’t get in I’ve got a college that I’m looking at and my Uncle has a lot of business connections.”

“You’re planning to audition for Danganronpa?” Kokichi feels his stomach twist and quite literally drop.

Shuuichi seems very excited that it’s brought up. He clasps his hands together and starts bouncing a bit. “Of course! All real Danganronpa fans should strive to want to be on the show. I’ve already written some executions for myself! I’d want to be the Ultimate Detective, since they’re always my favorite characters. Danganronpa even got me into True Crime, but not in that weird way where people have crushes on serial killers. I’ve actually been taking Forensics classes at our school and reading up on all kinds of murders. I’d love to kill someone on Danganronpa to make the perfect crime! Even if I fail and die for real from the simulation glitching, I’ll be one of the most memorable characters. Detectives never kill on Danganronpa, and I’d love to be the first...”

Kokichi shoves a bunch of food in his mouth so he doesn’t have to respond and nods. His fist sits on his thigh under the table, clenched. For some reason, he really doesn’t like the idea of Shuuichi leaving and possibly dying. The thought of Shuuichi Saihara, a weird but lovable loser, actually wanting to kill someone doesn’t sit well in Kokichi’s stomach.


	10. One bed

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> With one of the best cliches to exist, there's only one bed and Shuuichi and Kokichi are going to share it. Shuuichi's uncle makes an appearance, and it's not that good.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I went ahead and put summaries and TWs on all of the chapters!! ^w^ They'll be included in all the chapters from here on out.
> 
> TWs: Abuse

“So, uh, I’m not sure about a sleeping arrangement haha….” Shuuichi rubs the back of his head awkwardly as if he wasn’t planning on trying to sleep in the same bed as Kokichi the whole time.

Kokichi looks up at him. They’ve now moved back upstairs onto Shuuichi’s bed, watching uh… Kokichi thinks that they’re stand up comedy videos but put overtop of anime characters. He thinks about it for a second, face going red at the thought of sharing a bed with Shuuichi. Kokichi already thinks that Shuuichi is cute albeit a bit weird, but he's kind of jumping around who he wants to like right now. Well, no one said he had to commit to one “crush” at a time.

“I mean, it’ll be easier to just sleep in one bed I guess. Unless you want me to go move to a guest bed.”

Shuuichi seems to perk up at this, though not as much as he would if Kokichi had said ‘yes I want to sleep in the same bed as you’. “Ah, that’s alright. My uncle doesn’t like people sleeping in the guest bed, actually.” He thinks for a little bit, tapping his chin. “I’ll go get the lights and everything off and the windows closed and doors locked. I need to take my meds anyway. Do you have any you need to take?”

“I’m not taking any, no.” It’s partially true. Kokichi hasn’t gotten any refills and he doesn’t like being on medication even if it helps. They don’t even let him get on the one that actually was helping him after he attempted multiple overdoses. Kokichi can only afford testosterone right now, he can’t really go to therapy or get psych appointments as often as he needs.

Shuuichi gets up and does what he said. Kokichi tries to decipher the names of the medication without looking like he’s looking at them, getting a few of them down in his head but not all of them. Not because he wants to judge Shuuichi, no, but because he wants to look them up to get a better grasp on what’s wrong with him. Shuuichi sits back down on the bed and changes the TV to unsolved crime documentaries.

“I hope you don’t mind, they’re the only thing I’m really able to fall asleep to.” Shuuichi says as if Kokichi’s going to judge him harshly for it.

“As long as it’s not too loud I’ll be able to sleep.” Another lie. He doubts he’ll be able to get some sleep for a while, but he knows he can just go on his phone and turn the brightness down real low.

Kokichi takes his socks off and tosses them towards his backpack on the floor. He thinks that it’ll be cold enough that he can just wear the hoodie and pajama pants to bed without overheating. Shuuichi however takes off his pants, hat, and shirt, sitting back on the bed like it’s nothing. Kokichi stares at him for a bit, wondering how he can just do that casually. He spots the scars across Shuuichi’s chest, recognizing them immediately. Kokichi pays less mind to the other ones. He’d rather not make Shuuichi self conscious.

Speaking of self conscious. Kokichi grabs the blanket on the bed and pulls it over his legs. He lies down, facing away from Shuuichi. There’s plenty enough room on the bed for the both of them, but when sleeping with someone else things always feel a bit cramped. They end up ass to ass, Shuuichi falling asleep almost instantly and snoring softly.

Kokichi stares at his phone, not moving an inch. He’s always had issues with sleeping, but he doesn’t know how light or heavy of a sleeper Shuuichi is and if he’s able to move without waking the other man up. The snoring isn’t loud enough that it would keep Kokichi up thankfully. It’s almost endearing, actually.

He goes between looking at his phone and watching the unsolved crime documentaries for about an hour or so, still with no sleep. Kokichi moves slowly to his back, reaching to the side and putting his hand on Shuuichi’s shoulder to see if he’s easily awoken. Shuuichi doesn’t react by waking up, instead he turns over and puts a hand over Kokichi’s waist in his sleep. Kokichi covers his mouth, almost making an embarrassing noise. He slides out as fast and quietly as he can so that he doesn’t end up trapped in Shuuichi’s grip. Kokichi wonders if he really would’ve minded if he was less awake.

The stairs don’t creak when he goes down them. Kokichi’s plan is to snoop around downstairs a bit and see the rooms he never got to see, then get a small snack and a glass of water. He doesn’t think that he has to be quiet, but he does it out of habit. Kokichi’s always been able to sneak around easily. He makes his way to a bedroom downstairs, the door slowly creaking open. The master bathroom light is on, but there aren’t any other sounds coming from the room, so Kokichi assumes that no one else is home still. He enters the room, seeing a photo of a young Shuuichi next to an older man, who Kokichi thinks is Shuuichi’s uncle. He doesn’t stare at it too long, instead moving to glancing over the dressers and closet.

In the closet are a bunch of pristine suits and dress shoes. It’s what Kokichi figured. He can spy closer at some other point. He enters the bathroom for a hot second, though it’s mostly because damn that shower looks fancy. The bedroom looks boring otherwise, so he snakes his way over to the office.

Right as Kokichi is about to enter, he stops. Someone’s inside the office. He covers his mouth, not wanting his breath to be heard. He peeks though the door gap slightly, seeing an older, balding man with navy hair like Shuuichi’s. He’s dressed nice, and doesn’t seem to notice Kokichi.

That means no getting water. Kokichi quickly makes his way up the stairs, hoping to god they don’t creak. He turns around to look, just in case, and he locks eyes with the man in the room.

Kokichi rushes back upstairs, heart racing as he quickly gets back into the bed. Shuuichi’s still facing Kokichi’s spot on the bed, but he doesn’t reach out for him again. He pulls the covers over himself as if it would help him hide from Shuuichi’s uncle. When a few minutes pass with no noise, he deems that it’s safe and okay, finally relaxing on the bed.

When Kokichi wakes up, he finds that he’s been able to sleep at least somewhat well. Shuuichi’s bed is a lot cleaner than his own and the sheets aren’t ripped or stained. He rubs his eyes, hearing talking outside of the bedroom door. Kokichi’s curious as to what’s going on, though he’s not awake enough to fully listen in. He sits up and stretches, pushing the sheets off and getting up.

“-and I can’t believe you would invite someone over without MY permission. Look me in the eye, Shuuichi. Take that stupid hat off or I’ll throw it out.”

Kokichi snaps awake, stepping to the door and opening it up to see Shuuichi and his Uncle. Shuuichi’s hunched over, head bowed with one hand on his hat to cover his face. His Uncle is holding his wrist, using a small height advantage over Shuuichi. He looks pissed, and seems to be unbothered by the fact that Shuuichi is shivering and sobbing in front of him. 

“What’s going on here,” Kokichi asks. He’s firm, now looking Shuuichi’s uncle in his eye.

Shuuichi doesn’t turn to Kokichi or even acknowledge his existence.

His uncle, however, lets go of Shuuichi and is now facing Kokichi. “Get out of my house. I don’t know what Shuuichi told you but this is my house and I make the rules. I don’t want anyone over.”

“Yeah okay I can get that, but-” Kokichi tries to compose himself and appear confident. He never did like talking to adults that much when he couldn’t directly manipulate them. “-but you shouldn’t… make him take off his hat. Or grab him. That’s a dick move.”

Kokichi’s shoved out of the house, dragged by the arm. He tunes it out into a blur, but he’s sure that he bit Shuuichi’s uncle at least once and called him a balding ugly asshole. He spits in the vague direction of Shuuichi’s uncle, but isn’t sure if it hits. Great, his backpack and everything are still in there. Kokichi screams out of pure malice, kicking the door a few times for good measure and plopping down on the doorstep. “IF I DON’T GET MY STUFF BACK I’M NOT LEAVING!!!”

A few minutes later, the door opens. It’s Shuuichi, holding Kokichi’s stuff. He sets it down gently on the ground, head still bowed. When Kokichi asks if he’s okay, Shuuichi says nothing. He only looks up slightly- just enough for Kokichi to look at his eyes. They’re hazy, spaced out in an almost inhumane way.

While on the metro ride home, Kokichi still can’t help but be terrified of that expression.


	11. Religion Trauma

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> We get to meet one of Kokichi's actually good friends Tenko! And another old one... Angie. Kokichi's avoiding home, but eventually gives up and goes back.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TWs: Abuse, Forced Religion, Homophobia, Transphobia, Alcohol, Self-Harm

Kokichi’s not one to skip classes, but god he wishes that he was. However, right now he’s in the last class of the day, his art class, which is one that he actually likes. An acrylic painting sits in front of him- one of his own. Kokichi’s been stuck on it for the past 30 minutes, having made only a few brush strokes as he spaces out and stares at the mostly finished canvas.

Snap snap! Tenko’s hand snaps in front of his face. “Hello? Earth to Ouma-kun?”

He sighs, looking up at Tenko with a frankly pathetic look. “What is it Chabashira.”

“You were spacing out! Like you did 5 minutes ago, and 10 minutes ago, and 20 minutes ago…. Maybe you should go to the nurse.” Tenko winces at the thought. “Tenko was trying to talk to you this whole time but you kept ignoring her.” She taps her fingers together awkwardly, looking to the side.

“Oh, guess I did. What were you talking about?”

Tenko lights up, and starts rambling on almost immediately. “Ah! Tenko found this cute girl named Himiko Yumeno and she wants to be friends with Yumeno-san! Tenko’s Dad tried to tell her not to get close, like he does with all girls Tenko wants to be friends with… but Tenko isn’t listening to him! Yumeno-san is going to make such a good friend! She shares Tenko’s love of Danganronpa too!”

Kokichi’s spaced out, barely listening to Tenko ramble on. He’s more focused on the swelling of his neck from the large hand on it that morning. “... Sounds great Chabashira.”

“Yeah its-!” She blinks, and squints at Kokichi. “You’re spacing out again.”

He stares blankly at his brush on the desk. “Yeah.”

“Have you gotten enough to eat today? Did something happen that you aren’t telling Tenko? Does Tenko need to tell anyone off? If it’s that purple haired jock she will let him know just who he’s messing with!” She raises an eyebrow, and leans in close, whispering just a bit too loud. “... Or is it….... your dad.”

Kokichi groans, putting his head on his desk in a small space not covered by anything. He runs his hands through his hair as if to comfort himself. “Chabashira, I’m fine, okay? I’ll deal with it on my own.”

She frowns. “You don’t have to do everything alone you know. Sometimes letting someone stronger help you is good.”

“I don’t need help,” Kokichi snaps, flashing her a mean look before putting his head back down.

Tenko huffs, one of her hands clenching into a fist, but she takes a deep breath and turns to her work instead of to Kokichi. “One day you’ll actually accept someone’s help, and you’ll be better off for it. You’ll look back on yourself and wish you had accepted it, and Tenko will forgive you once you forgive yourself.”

The words make Kokichi’s stomach bitter. He knows that she’s right.

Kokichi’s painting is finished by the end of the day. He turns it in for his teacher, who loves it more than Kokichi thought he would. Tenko exits the classroom before him, flashing him a genuine, but almost sad smile. He watches her leave, his own expression neutral. He hates being wrong. He hates being belittled and he hates people trying to help him. He can figure it out on his own, and not be weak in the process.

Today is different from most days. Kokichi doesn’t head to the basement nor does he head to the storage shed. He ignores his buzzing of his phone, eventually turning all volume and vibrations on his phone off while he walks off campus towards a nearby local cafe.

There’s no one in line. Kokichi slams a wad of crumpled up cash onto the counter and grabs an energy drink from the minifridge full of sodas and juice. The cashier counts his cash, finding it to be twice as much as the price of the drink, and they put the rest of the cash in the tip jar. Kokichi’s done this before- a few times actually.

“There’s a big man in a baseball hat with a beard who was following me…. Y-you won’t tell anyone I’m here, right Mister?” Kokichi puts on his most innocent, scared voice, pouting up at the cashier and looking around like he’s scared of someone. It’s all an act. The cashier looks concerned, but nods. Kokichi stomps back to the most hidden booth, collapsing in it and putting his earbuds in at the highest volume.

Hiding from his Dad was always his least favorite thing to do. Whether it be under the bed, in a closet, locked in his room, whatever. Now he can only do it outside of the apartment. Kokichi can’t do anything but run and hide. Even when his Dad chases him to yell at him for overreacting and being weak or even to attempt to apologize for an hour and not letting Kokichi leave or say anything. He’d never accept that apology.

He’s already had all of his energy drink and was starting to relax when someone quietly sits down in the booth across from him. Kokichi immediately rips out his earbuds, pulling all his things closer to him. “I don’t know if you’re stupid or not but this seat’s taken. Go away. Now.”

It takes him a few seconds to recognize the girl in front of him. Her white bangs nearly cover her blue eyes, looking up at Kokichi with an emptiness that he saw gradually form himself. She looks to be wearing her usual school uniform, a modest black two piece suit dress with a navy vest under the jacket. Angie Yonaga, an old family friend of Kokichi’s. Devoutly religious for the life she had in Japan, the prodigy adopted child of her parents. He’s not sure which kind, he never payed attention to the teachings when he was forced to go to church with them. Kokichi doesn’t think the adoption was legal and was more like a kidnapping. Kokichi remembers the day Angie confessed to him that she wasn’t sure she believed in her parent’s god. And he remembers the days and months after as her bright self began to fade and she stopped talking to everyone. He was never very close to her though- just a friend seen when their families would see each other.

“Do you not recognize me, Kokichi?” She asks, soft. Void of anything. “You should. Your Father liked me, at least.”

“What do you want Yonaga,” Kokichi snaps. He slowly makes his way towards the edge of the booth, ready to run at any second.

Angie frowns. She looks so tired. “You look miserable, Kokichi. I’ll keep you in my prayers. Kami-sama may prepare hardships for you, but in your faith to him you can persevere.”

“Okay, I’m done here. Don’t talk to me again.” Kokichi stands up and calmly walks to the door, not wanting to make a scene. He doesn’t think to look behind him as he walks into the alleyway.

That is, until he feels a hand on his wrist. Kokichi shrieks and yanks his hand away, instinctively getting into a defensive position. It lowers when he realizes that it was just Angie. “Why are you following me, I said don’t talk to me again!”

“I-” Angie retracts her hand. “... You need the help of Kami-sama, Kokichi. He is reaching out to you through me. He tells me through healing you can stop being sad. You can stop being homosexual and transgender. I found you-”

“If you don’t shut up right now, I’ll smack you.” He almost near raises his hand, but stops when tears well up in Angie’s eyes. He’s not sure he regrets it. He’s not sure of anything right now. “Your parents may talk shit about me to you. I don’t care. You’re going to stay away from me. And-” He pauses. Kokichi always gets self conscious when people call him gay, for some reason. He finishes with a lie. “-I’m bi, not gay. I like women too.”

Angie stays silent. She falls to her knees. Kokichi debates on staying, but instead he just runs. He doesn’t realize he’s crying until he’s forcing himself to blink, tears clouding his vision. His eyesight gets blurry enough that he can’t see for just a few seconds and he ends up crashing face first into the lid of a dumpster.

He remembers the times they played together as kids. Usually, it was pretending to be horses. Kokichi never was really into it, but Angie would go around galloping and eating grass until their parents called them inside for dinner. Kokichi never had too many friends growing up, mostly spending his time reading and trying to impress boys and his neighbors. And plenty of other more fucked up things. Their families would go to religious services together, but most of those memories are blocked off.

Years back, probably when Kokichi was around 12, he had told Angie about his sexuality questioning. This was when she confessed to him she wasn’t sure she believed in god. They’d been family friends for a few years at this point. A day later Angie approached him and told him she was praying for him and she hoped that he felt better and less ‘sinful’. That was when they stopped talking, likely because of her parents. He knows that there’s nothing inherently wrong with religion, only the people who force it upon others. 

Kokichi grabs his head and groans, not even realizing that he was on the ground until he realized he was looking at the sky and the top of a dumpster lid. He lays there for a while, blood trickling down his forehead. Nothing that’ll need medical attention since the human head bleeds like a motherfucker when you so much as bonk it.

He checks his phone finally. There’s many, many missed calls and texts from his Dad. Kokichi clears the notifications and looks to see if anyone else contacted him. He doesn’t feel the need to check social media. No one knows who he is on anything and he has a collective following of about 10 people. None of them friends.

There is a text from Shuuichi though. It’s just a picture of Hajime the cat with his fangs out. And a text from Tenko, asking him if he remembered to get lunch. Kokichi leaves both of them on read and sighs. Maybe he should go back home...

Kokichi takes a deep breath. His legs are exhausted from all his walking and running. He opens the door to his apartment as silently as possible. It reeks of cheap alcohol, cigarettes, and weed. Empty bottles line the kitchen counter along with dirty dishes- some of them broken from their fight. The carpet is stained with dirt and ash and spilled drinks. He sees his Dad on the couch, snoring loudly with the small TV on.

There’s only one bedroom and bathroom in the apartment. His Dad sleeps on the couch while Kokichi sleeps in the one room. It’s partially paid for by Kokichi’s mom, but he can tell she’s struggling with keeping up the separate housing. Kokichi grabs a bottle from the cabinet as quietly as he can and starts pouring it into an empty soda bottle. His Dad never notices the stolen alcohol. Or anything stolen really.

Kokichi will drink later. He walks to the Television and turns it off to conserve energy usage. He turns to his Dad, an empty feeling in his stomach. Kokichi never stopped wanting the man dead. He glances towards the knives, but quickly turns away from them and softly makes his way back to his room.

His bedsheets haven’t been washed in a while but Kokichi plans on trying to wash them soon. There’s no washing machine or dryer in the apartment, and Kokichi hates the laundromat. There’s a desk that only serves to collect dust and a dresser for his thrifted clothes- both having been his Mom’s old furniture. On his floor is a box from a winter coat company. He’s waiting until it gets cold to open it. His Mom tries to buy him a new winter coat every few years as a nice gift, usually when his current one has gotten worn down and ripped.

The bed no matter how nasty is welcoming. Kokichi sets his backpack down gently on the floor and pulls out his laptop. The pillows get arranged into almost a throne so that he can sit back and pretend like he’s going to finish his school work.

Instead he shuts his laptop off after a few minutes of blank staring and sets it on the floor. The bottle of hard whiskey on his floor looks great. Kokichi grabs it and drinks as much of it as he can, gagging from the strong scent and taste. He wipes his mouth and puts the bottle in his backpack for later. Kokichi curls up and waits for the dizzying feeling to set in while he drags his nails across his arms and back, burying himself under the covers as a shield.


	12. Stroke..?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kokichi is awoken in the middle of the night by Shuuichi, coming in through his window after an emergency. Shuuichi isn't there the next day at school, and Kokichi completely figures out why.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TWs: Self harm, Blood, Alcohol mention, Murder

Receiving calls isn’t something that Kokichi is used to. Usually no one at all contacts him, save for Tenko really. Though as of recent, Shuuichi’s been texting him almost daily. Just simple conversation, like asking how Kokichi’s doing or if he has any plans. They’ve been hanging out some during lunch lately- usually Shuuichi’s been bringing something to share with Kokichi, and it’s often that Gonta joins them. Shuuichi’s even started offering to drive Kokichi home, though Kokichi never lets him see the apartment complex where he lives, instead just giving directions to the entrance of a nicer neighborhood that’s a 10 minute walk away.

Kokichi wakes up from his phone ringing, around 4 am. He groans, blinking a few times while he registers that yes, that’s his phone and someone is calling him. He reaches over to check who’s calling, seeing Shuuichi’s name. In a sleepy daze he just lets it ring and he near passes out again until there’s a knocking on his window.

He shoots up and pulls his blanket closer, trying to see what the noise was. Kokichi gulps, grabbing his phone to use as a flashlight as he hears the window being opened. Shit, did he forget to lock it? In the split second that it takes for Kokichi to turn his flashlight on, someone thumps over his desk placed by the window and tumbles to the floor, knocking down his desk chair.

“Saihara!?”

Kokichi immediately gets up, hiding his body with the blanket. Sleeping in a t shirt and boxers is fine until someone comes into your room. In the dark Kokichi scrabbles about for a hoodie and shorts, hoping that they aren’t put on backwards. He turns his light on and drops his phone, moving to Shuuichi’s side.

Gripped in Shuuichi’s bloody hand is a plastic bag. Kokichi spots the blood on his hand, seeing it dripping from under his sleeve. He gulps, watching some of it drop onto his floor.

“It’s my blood, not his.” Shuuichi drops the bag, not caring where it falls. “Hide this.”

“Whoa whoa whoa how the fuck did you get in my apartment you shouldn’t even know where I-?!” Kokichi moves away from Shuuichi, putting an arm in front of himself out of reflex. Yeah, he’s got a lot of questions. “You shouldn’t know where I live and why the hell are you-”

Shuuichi reaches forward, covering Kokichi’s mouth. He doesn’t look Kokichi in the eye, pulling his hat down with his other hand. He’s sweating like all hell broke loose, and there’s a harsh trembling to his hand. Shuuichi doesn’t answer any of Kokichi’s questions, only saying one word with a sickening smile, “Help.”

Kokichi rushes to the bathroom, grabbing some first aid supplies. Shuuichi did say it was his own blood. He comes back, finding Shuuichi still lying on his bedroom floor. Kokichi closes the door behind him as gently as possible, not wanting to wake his father up and cause alarm. He pushes Shuuichi’s sleeves up and starts to clean everything.

Not once does Shuuichi look back up at him. He’s breathing heavily, occasionally wincing as Kokichi fixes him up. He doesn’t speak either.

“Saihara. What happened.” Kokichi asks, firm and wanting answers. 

Shuuichi shakes his head no. Kokichi asks again, getting the same head shake for the second time. He doesn’t know how else to ask, gulping nervously and looking at the clock. 4:30 AM. They should both be asleep at this time.

“.... Here. I’ll get your shirt washed for you I guess. I was trying to find a time to give you back your clothes actually.” Kokichi stands up, moving over to his dresser where the hoodie and PJ’s Shuuichi lent to him sit folded. He brings them over to Shuuichi, and tugs on the bloody shirt. Shuuichi offers no resistance but no help either, and Kokichi pulls it off and tries to get Shuuichi in the T-shirt.

“You stay here, okay?” Kokichi goes over and closes his window. He doesn’t exactly want to leave Shuuichi alone, and it seems Shuuichi doesn’t want that either. 

Shuuichi grabs his pant leg weakly. It’s not hard enough to be anything but slightly noticeable. Kokichi stops and kneels down, wondering what the fuck to do. He thinks about what he normally does when he himself is freaking out, but Kokichi doesn’t actually have any good coping mechanisms so that’s no help. He goes under his blanket sometimes…? Maybe that’s a first step. Kokichi grunts and drags Shuuichi up on his bed so that he’s not lying on the floor. He guesses that he can wash the bloody shirt later.

Exhaustion hits. Kokichi grabs a few dirty clothes and puts them over the few small blood stains on the carpet. He can clean them later. Not thinking too straight Kokichi lies down on the bed next to Shuuichi. The other man immediately grabs onto Kokichi like a human teddy bear and starts sobbing into Kokichi’s shoulder. 

Kokichi never knows what to do when other people cry. It’s kind of annoying to him actually. But he thinks he can try to do something. “Uh, it’s gonna be okay, Saihara.” He gently pats Shuuichi’s arm, and falls asleep despite Shuuichi’s shaking and quiet crying.

When he wakes up, Shuuichi’s missing, and his bedroom window is wide open.

Before school starts Kokichi has at it with the stains on his carpet. Shuuichi’s old shirt sits on his floor. He tosses it into his dirty clothes hamper, figuring he can give it to Shuuichi later. He looks around, trying to further see if anything is out of place. The desk chair seems to have already been put back. Kokichi still has no idea what happened. Maybe Shuuichi just needed a place to stay for a bit. Kokichi knows how his Uncle acts and wouldn’t doubt that Shuuichi needs an escape from that.

The plastic bag Shuuichi had been holding is found under Kokichi’s bed, just haphazardly tossed there. When Kokichi grabs and opens it, he finds a pair of gloves and an empty syringe. He gulps, and shoves it fully under his bed.

It’s lunch, and Shuuichi never arrives. Gonta does, though. He comes late, looking around almost frantically when he spots Kokichi.

“... Where’s Saihara?” It’s the first thing Kokichi asks. 

“I was gonna ask you the same thing, he texted me this morning but,” Gonta sits down, shaking the table with the force of it, “it was to tell me that his Uncle died in the night of a stroke. Gonna be honest, I’m a lil worried about him. I know he doesn’t really like the guy but death of family isn’t too baller.”

Kokichi’s mouth goes dry and his stomach drops. Shuuichi’s uncle died, and Shuuichi came into Kokichi’s house in with an empty syringe and gloves. He puts a hand to his mouth, digging his nails into his own thigh as he realizes fully what happened.

“You good, or-“

Kokichi stands up fast, fast enough that dark spots encroach the corners of his vision. “E-excuse me. I have to go to the bathroom.”

He locks himself in an empty bathroom after making sure no one’s in the stalls. The image of Shuuichi on his flood, blood dripping from his sleeves was already burned into his mind. Kokichi wishes that he could have drank heavily to forget exactly what it looked like. He stumbles over to the sink and turns on the cold water, sticking his hands in and running his cold hands along his face and neck in an attempt to cool himself down.

Shuuichi could be found out. He could be found out and arrested. Especially if Kokichi just tells a single other person what happened. Did Shuuichi really trust him enough to cover up MURDER for him?

“What the hell… what the hell…” Kokichi stares up at himself. Water droplets slowly drip down his face until tears join them as well. He runs his hands through his hair, not sure if he’s doing it to comfort himself or to hurt himself. “Saihara…”


	13. Fake Dating

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tenko and Kokichi go on a date! It doesn't go well! Or, well, it sort of does?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TWs: Mentions of Parental abuse, Mentions of murder

“Ouma-kun! Ouma-kun! Your painting looks great today, have you been working on it at home?” Of course, Tenko is here. She’s not a bad sight to see though. After rushing out of lunch, Kokichi skipped the rest of his classes for the day, but came in for the last class- art. The only one he really enjoys.

Kokichi sets his brush down, turning to Tenko with an almost smile to his face. He looks like total crap, but he guesses that Tenko just hasn’t noticed. “Yeah, I’ve been working on it after school some. I’m allowed in the art room after everything ends, plus I don’t really do anything stupid like vandalize the room. I think I’m almost done, but there’s still things I need to fix up.”

“You’re still not done yet? It looks finished.” Tenko looks over at her own art. The two of them use different mediums- Kokichi using gouache and Tenko using charcoal. Kokichi doesn’t know much about charcoal, but he knows when a piece is unfinished. Tenko has a habit of turning in work too early, saying that it’s good enough to be done with. 

“Everything looks finished to you,” He jokes almost bitterly despite being right. “You could look at a pencil sketch and go ‘Looks good to me, I’ll turn it in.’”

Tenko pouts, sitting down at her spot next to Kokichi. “Just because you’re right doesn’t mean you have to say it…”

They talk for most of the class, though it’s mostly Tenko. She’s been working at a new gym, and is currently trying to talk Kokichi into joining. He’s not a fan of the comments on his physical stature, but he just stays uncomfortably silent while he does more detail work on his painting.

“... I had a really strange thing happen to me last night.” He tests the water a bit. Maybe he can ease himself into talking at least a bit about it, without putting Shuuichi or himself in the danger of the law.

“Ehhh? Ouma-kun, are you opening up about something? It must be really bad if that’s the case! Tenko will listen with open ears though!” Tenko gives him a thumbs up.

Yeah, he can’t bring himself to say ‘Hey you know that weird Danganronpa kid well I think he murdered his own Uncle and gave me evidence to hide. Haha, funny, amirite? Please don’t call the cops.’ Hmmm… He remembers that Tenko is into Danganronpa. He can’t exactly back out now that Tenko knows something is up- she’ll try to squeeze information out if she can.

“...... You watch Danganronpa right?”

“Of course Tenko watches Danganronpa! Tenko’s, uh, not really as caught up with it as some people, though. Have you started to get into it too? Tenko thought you hated it?” She raises an eyebrow. 

It was silly of Kokichi to ask, especially since she has charms of some of the girls on her backpack. He clears his throat and spats out his response. “I met the finalist from the last season at a party. Uhh… Rantaro Amami or something.” Yeah, that’s good enough for Tenko to think that he’s not hiding something from her.

She gasps, and then has to wrack her brain for whoever the fuck the guy was Kokichi mentioned. “Er, Tenko’s sure she knows who he is. But not off the top of Tenko’s head. But you’re right, that IS weird!”

He’s absolutely going to forego the whole ‘yeah I had sex with him in a closet’ deal. Tenko might freak out a bit at that. “... Yeah. It was pretty weird. I think Saihara has a bodypillow of him.”

Tenko taps her chin, humming a bit. “You talk about that guy Saihara a lot. Tenko thought he was just a really weird obsessed freak? You don’t take a liking to that many people…. So there must be something really special about him!”

“Ah- special? Um, no, we just hang out some.” He grumbles a bit, knowing that his current friendship with Shuuichi is now in the ‘weird’ category. “You talk about that girl Yumeno a lot, what’s the deal with that?”

“Eeee! Y-Yumeno-san is just a friend! You know Tenko’s Dad doesn’t like her befriending girls, Ouma-kun. And she’s not weirded out by that! And she likes Danganronpa too, and she’s really cute, and-”

Kokichi smirks, putting a finger to his lips almost smugly. “You’re rambling again.”

She quiets down, making an embarrassed noise that’s weirder than it should be. Suddenly she perks up, looking at the clock. “Oh! Ouma-kun, class is almost over! What are your plans for tonight?”

“Plans? Well,” He thinks for a second and hesitates. Should he just go ahead and ask her if she wants to go to like Waffle House or something? He sucks it up, the voice in his head shouting for him to be a man. “I was- uh, wondering if you wanted to go out somewhere like a cheap restaurant or something maybe? Only somewhere cheap I don’t have that much money to spend.”

“A… a DATE!?” She says way too loud, standing up and slamming her hands on the desk in surprise. A few classmates look over at her, figuring that the weird kids are just being weird again. Can you imagine being the weird kids in an art class? That’s a new level of pathetic. She laughs awkwardly and sits her ass back down. “T-Tenko would love to! Ah, she has the perfect outfit for it too!”

“You had to shout, didn’t you…” He grumbles, slightly annoyed by her drawing attention to the both of them. “But yeah, I guess. A-” He swallows nervously. “-A date. Does the Waffle house down the street at around 4 sound okay?”

“.... You’re taking Tenko to Waffle House. On a date.” She looks disappointed. 

He laughs a bit awkwardly. “Haha… yeah?”

“T… Tenko is looking forward to it..!” She seems just as awkward and nervous as Kokichi does, which calms his nerves a bit.

The bell rings, and Kokichi mooches a ride off of Gonta to go home, get dressed, and go to. The epitome of sex, the restaraunt of legends, Waffle fucking House. Like always he made Gonta drop him off at a different place, but this time Kokichi made sure he was absolutely not followed. There’s already one person aware of how he lives, he’d rather there not be two.

“You know you’re stupid for taking a girl on a date to fucking Waffle House, right Ouma. I’m not a fashion god either but you shouldn’t be wearing JORTS to a DATE.” Gonta’s been chiding him the whole way. And Gonta doesn’t even know Who Kokichi is taking yet. “Who’s this girl anyway? I thought you liked it up the butt if you catch my drift.”

“I’m not-!” Kokichi groans, slamming his head on the dashboard. “I just want it to be casual! And it’s, uh, a girl in my art class. Tenko Chabashira, if you know her-”

“HER? Like, for real?” Gonta makes a stop in the middle of the road and honks, full body turning to Kokichi. “I’ve known Tenko for years man, she would NOT want- okay. Take this as non-offensively as you can. Are you ready? Because this is probably going to be insulting. She would not go for twinks who are like half a foot shorter than her and whose biceps you can fit two fingers around. Like this.” Gonta puts two fingers around Kokichi’s arm just to prove his point.

Kokichi smacks his arm, shoving Gonta’s hand away. “Don’t touch me, okay! Ugh, why did I think you of all people would be able to drive me to this. I should’ve just walked at this point.”

Gonta starts driving again, howling with laughter. Kokichi hunches over in the seat, grumbling insults to himself. Gonta threatens to kick him out of the car, but quickly apologizes and starts talking about less insulting topics. Though, Kokichi’s not sure how much he wants to hear about the different native fungi while on a car ride to a date.

He gets dropped off, not giving Gonta a goodbye as he exits the car. Kokichi’s late, but Tenko should also probably be late too, right?

Wrong, Tenko arrived 15 minutes early. She’s got a cup of coffee, looking bored while scrolling mindlessly on her phone. Kokichi curses under his breath and sits down across from her. He’s probably sweating at least a bit.

“Uh, hi Chabashira. Sorry I’m late.”

She looks up, smiling now that Kokichi is here. It’s a polite smile, probably hiding some anger. Tenko’s actually dressed up nicer than what Kokichi expected, in a nice yellow sundress and sandals. Her face drops a bit when she sees what Kokichi’s wearing. “... Are you really wearing jorts on a date?”

Kokichi puts his head in one of his hands, groaning in annoyance. “I thought it’d be casual. Gokuhara chided me on it earlier.”

“Oh! Did Gokuhara-kun take you here? He’s, well, nice Tenko guesses.”

“No he’s not don’t lie to yourself.”

“You’re sort of right but you don’t have to say rude things as often as you do, Ouma-kun.” Tenko taps her fingers together, taking another sip of her coffee. “You know, Tenko’s normally not allowed to drink coffee or wear dresses, but she thinks a little rebellion is in order today! Stick it to the men, as they say.”

They both order, not saying too much to each other at all. It’s even worse than their socializing habits to each other in class. Kokichi doesn’t eat much of his food, his stomach twisting from his nervousness in the situation. Tenko’s nice, yeah. She’s nice and she’s a girl, and she’s got a girl name and a girl face and girl hair. Quick, what’s the first step to not looking like you’re only into men! 1. The Tits.

.. Yeah, no. Tenko would probably tear him to shreds if he even so much as glanced in that direction (though he can’t really blame her). Kokichi looks to the side, slowly drinking his soda while he tries to figure out what to do. This feels wrong, but he doesn’t really know why. Kokichi pulls out his phone, looking at it under the table so that he can google ‘what to say to a girl on a date’. When he sees ‘talk about HER on the date’, he clears his throat and looks up.

“Sorry it’s so awkward I’ve only been on dates with boys before. Wait that’s about me and that implies- okay, I like girls, I do. Uh, have you been on a date before?” That should suffice, right?

Tenko is busy staring at his ugly little almost-pubestache. She’s disgusted by it. She looks up at the question, finally able to talk about something. “Um.. no actually! Tenko hasn't. Have you? .... Wait, you just said that. Sorry, Tenko’s so nervous!!!”

Kokichi’s been cultivating that pubestache actually. He’s trying so hard. He laughs a bit, looking to the side. Right now he’s working on a plan, not having gone into this date with much of one. He can’t just say ‘Hey I’m insanely horny all the time because I’m a man and I think I might have really bad trauma, how do you feel about one night stands and then I’ll avoid you for months afterwards?’ … Kokichi can’t even think about Tenko like that for some reason.

He shoves a bite of a waffle in his mouth and speaks. “So… how’s Yumeno been doing?” It’s the first thing that comes to mind, and he thinks it can brighten up the mood since Tenko always looks happy when talking about Himiko.

She does in fact perk up a bit. “Ah! Yumeno-san, Tenko.. Thinks she’s been doing alright? Yumeno-san made Tenko a ‘Warriorsona’ the other day, but Tenko’s not too sure what that means. There’s a picture of it somewhere…” Tenko looks through her photos for a second and shows Kokichi a picture of a drawing. It’s kind of crude and looks like a blue and green sparkledog (in this case cat). “Mine is called ‘Brightstar’ and hers is called ‘Rubytiger.’” Tenko swipes, a new picture of a drawing of a red cat and a blue cat cuddling popping up. “And this is both of our ‘Warriorsonas’ together! Yumeno-san drew them, isn’t she so talented?”

Kokichi thinks they look like shit, but doesn’t say anything. “Yeah. Has she thought about joining the art class?” He says it sarcastically, but Tenko doesn’t pick up on that.

“Tenko’s actually been asking her! But since it’s our last year, Tenko doesn’t think she’s able to…. Now it’s Tenko’s turn to ask about your friends! How’s that Saihara guy been doing?”

“Um…” Kokichi’s stomach drops. He thinks he should just say the good stuff. “I think he’s been doing alright... I went to his house once but his Uncle-” He pauses. “His Uncle didn’t like me. The guy uh, died last night. So I haven’t been able to contact Saihara today. But we’re usually together during lunch and he’s been driving me home for the past two or so weeks.”

Tenko puts her hand to her mouth at the part where Kokichi says Shuuichi’s Uncle died. She makes a sympathetic noise- though genuine it’s obvious she doesn’t really care. “Oh, that doesn’t sound very good. Uh, Ouma-kun, you don’t look very good. Are you sure you’re alright?” Tenko reaches out towards his shoulder, but Kokichi pushes her hand away.

“I’m fine.” He pauses, and looks up at Tenko. “So, uh, what else do you want to do on this.. Date?”

“Eh? More? Uh, T-Tenko supposes that… she could be your first kiss?” She taps her fingers together, and Kokichi spots a bead of sweat roll down her cheek. 

“But I’ve kissed people before-”

“Tenko will be your first kiss! Er- but, not inside the Waffle House. Tenko’s done eating, if you want to go somewhere else. A park would be a nice place! Way nicer than Waffle House.” She’s oblivious to the fact that Kokichi’s kinda sad that everyone keeps shitting on his (not good) date ideas.

Kokichi huffs a bit, finishing his drink. “I’ll go pay, there’s a park nearby here.”

The park isn’t the nicest one in the area, but it’s the one that Kokichi knows best. There’s still spots damaged by the Great Tragedy that are off limits and likely a bit radioactive, and people aren’t very good at picking up their trash. The pathways have signs that say ‘safe to enter’ or ‘DO NOT ENTER’, and Kokichi takes Tenko down one of the lesser known yet safe paths.

“There’s a log to sit on just down the path. I figured it would be better than staying in the center of the park where people are.” Kokichi’s hands are in his pockets, and he keeps looking back at Tenko with a nervous, almost nauseous feeling in his stomach.

“Oh yeah! Since you’re not someone who really likes people at all, gotcha!” Tenko fiddles with her dress some, appearing just as nervous as Kokichi. “Tenko’s a bit closed off herself. But definitely not to the same level.”

Kokichi wonders if he can go a single page without someone insulting him. “Thanks.” 

They make their way to the log that Kokichi was talking about. It’s big enough for about three people, and there’s not any branches in the way. He sits down, and pats the spot next to him for Tenko to sit down at.

“Oh! Is this the part where… the boy kisses the girl, or they hold hands, or..” Tenko doesn’t turn to Kokichi, and it appears she’s going through what a ‘normal date’ is supposed to be in her head. Kokichi can see some amount of sweat causing her dress to stick to her back. He covers his mouth and doesn’t comment on it.

Neither of them talk for a bit, both of them just staring and thinking nervously.

Tenko is the first to speak up. “Um… Ouma-kun. Okay, um, Tenko has to tell you a secret. Please, please don’t tell anyone.” Kokichi raises an eyebrow. “You’re very nice, in your own way of course. And you’re a good friend of Tenko’s, and Tenko likes you a lot! But, this really isn’t working out. You know how Tenko’s father is, and-”

“Are you a lesbian?”

“HEEEEEEEE!!!!!” Tenko immediately starts crying, flapping her hands around and curling in on herself. It only makes sense, given her Dad’s tendency to have to force her to be around men. And how she only ever talks about girls- whether fictional or real.

Ah, shit, she’s crying. Kokichi blurts out, “Ah, shit! Shit! Um, Chabashira, I don’t care and I think I’m gay too…!” He reaches forward, patting her shoulder a bit awkwardly.

Tenko immediately wraps herself around Kokichi, burying her head in his shoulder and sobbing. Kokichi makes a noise sounding vaguely like ‘HRRK” and freezes up. He doesn’t really know what to do. Kokichi’s never liked touching people who he wasn’t trying to get with. He slowly wraps his arms around her, determined not to let himself cry over figuring himself out either. 

“I won’t tell anyone at all. We can keep it secret.” He pats her back a bit awkwardly. Tenko thanks him over and over again, clinging to his little body and rocking back and forth like her life depends on it. 

Eventually she does pull back, sniffling and wiping her nose on her arm. “... Sorry. Tenko should be the one protecting you, not the other way around.”

“Don’t be sorry. I don’t really care about that stuff you know.” Kokichi hasn’t dared come out as trans to anyone. The only people who know are Tsumugi, Kaito, and now Rantaro. Though he thinks that other people are able to easily tell, especially since he doesn’t pass well despite trying so hard to. “Yeah… I think we both were able to find this out today. This was the first time I approached a girl like, on a date.”

“Ehe… this is Tenko’s first ‘date’ ever… Tenko’s not supposed to date until she’s 21 technically, but that’s when her Father plans to find a man for her. And… that isn’t what Tenko wants. Tenko thinks that she wants a cute girl who she can take care of and love forever! But, she’ll get hit like the other times.” Tenko shakes a bit just thinking about it. “But Tenko thinks that she’ll move out, maybe audition for Danganronpa with Yumeno-san! And if her father tries to do anything she’ll beat him with a baseball bat over and over until he apologizes for everything.”

“That’s, uh.” Kokichi clears his throat. “Quite a plan.” He lets out a breath he didn’t realize he was holding in. That situation resolved better than he was expecting it to. “Um.. what do you want to do now?”

Tenko taps her chin in thought. “Um… can Tenko tell you another secret? This might be a bit shocking… but Tenko thinks that Yumeno-san is her forever girl. Oh! Maybe you can meet her some day! To be honest, Tenko doesn't think you would like each other, but could you be nice for Tenko?”

That’s a loaded question. Kokichi? Being nice? “Yeah, I can try.”

“Oh, thank you Ouma-kun! Um, if you need a ride home, I can give you one!” Tenko suggests. Kokichi didn’t know she could drive, but it makes sense.

He gives her a little smile and thinks about it for a second. It’s probably about time he gave Shuuichi a visit to see what the fuck is going on.


	14. 80cm Monokuma

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Shuuichi and Kokichi talk about the event of the previous night. To make up for it, Shuuichi takes Kokichi out to have some fun! Just the two of them, alone, having fun, nothing homoerotic at all!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TWs: Weed, Discussion of murder, Mention of parental abuse

“Bye-bye Ouma-kun!! Make sure you eat dinner and drink plenty of water!!! And tell Saihara-san Tenko says hi! Well, he doesn’t know Tenko, but tell him anyway!” Tenko waves goodbye when Kokichi exits her busted old car, driving away as quickly as she dropped Kokichi off.

He didn’t tell Tenko much at all, only that he was ‘going to spend the night with Shuuichi’. Which may or may not be a lie. Kokichi went ahead and texted Shuuichi that he was going to come over, getting an uncharacteristically short response of ‘ok’. He takes a deep breath when he gets to the door. The house is less silent than the first time he was there, and it looks like Shuuichi’s bedroom window is open and he’s blasting music. There’s a distinct smell of weed coming from the house.

Kokichi rings the doorbell and tries the door, finding it unlocked. He enters, and slowly makes his way through the house and up to Shuuichi’s room. It’s not too hard to navigate and remember where it is, even though Kokichi was only there the one time.

Shuuichi’s got a bowl and lighter in his hand, and he exhales smoke when Kokichi enters the room. His hat is off, but when he hears Kokichi’s footsteps he grabs it and puts it back on. Shuuichi turns to his friend, last night's makeup smudged on his eyes like he tried to clean it off but couldn’t get everything. He looks sad and empty, but he smiles a bit when he sees Kokichi.

“Saihara, we need to-”

“I’m sorry.” Shuuichi turns back around, going to take another hit. “Ouma-kun.. I’m sorry. I’ll do anything to make up for it. I’m sure you already figured it out. You’re smart. You’re really, really, smart, and I-” He chokes a bit on his words. “I won’t be mad if you turn me in.”

Kokichi swallows. Anger bubbles up in his stomach, and he clenches his fist in his pocket. “He deserved it. I guess. I hate cops and if they don’t catch you, then they don’t catch you. They probably won’t anyway, if they wanted to hatecrime you you’d already be dead after they questioned you. I just want to know why the hell you know where I live.”

“Oh, um… It might sound a little creepy. But I won’t keep it secret. One day when I was driving you home it was really storming and I got super scared you’d get struck by lightning or you’d get hurt. I sort of followed you home to make sure you’d be okay… Then I realized I was being creepy and I left. I’m sorry, if you don’t want to be friends anymore I can drive you home and you can never talk to me again, I won’t be mad.” The way Shuuichi’s voice cracks makes Kokichi realize he’s crying. He sniffles and hunches over, not able to bring himself to turn back around to face Kokichi.

Well, Kokichi might as well admit why he didn’t want Shuuichi to see where he lives. “Don’t say shit like that, it’s manipulative as hell even if you don’t mean it that way. I don’t care about that and I won’t stop being your friend or whatever. I just didn’t want you to see that fucking hellhole. If you lived in a place like that you wouldn’t want people to see it either. And of course there’s my Dad.”

“Is it true he beats you?” Shuuichi’s posture eases a bit when he realizes Kokichi won’t leave him, and he turns to Kokichi with concern.

“NO!” Kokichi spits out, gritting his teeth. Shuuichi must have heard the rumors, probably from Kaede or Kaito or someone else. No way in hell is he letting anyone know anything about his life. It’s not like that rumor is completely right anyway. It makes him weak. It makes it seem like he’s a stupid weak baby. “Did Akamatsu tell you or something? Whatever comes out of her mouth about me is a lie or grossly exaggerated.”

“Aha… yeah. She does tend to exaggerate things…” He clears his throat a bit. “Are you sure you still want to be friends?”

Kokichi’s a bit annoyed by his continuous apologies, but he tries not to judge. “Yeah. It doesn’t matter to me or whatever.” He sits down next to Shuuichi. Part of him wants to ask exactly how he did it. Part of him doesn’t want to know. “.... Gokuhara was worried about you. At lunch.”

“I’m not gonna tell him anything, but I texted him that I’m ok. My Uncle dying doesn’t hurt. I’ve wanted to… y’know… kill him for a while. When he kicked you out of the house I couldn’t stand hearing him talk about my friends like they’re going to manipulate and use me, so I did it in the night when I was ready.” Shuuichi laughs a bit, pulling his hat down over his face. “I can’t believe I did it. They barely even questioned me. I just hope I don’t ever get caught.”

“Can I have some?” Kokichi points to the bowl in Shuuichi’s hand, desperately wanting a subject change. Ideally, Kokichi would probably get blackout drunk at this point. The ‘date’ with Tenko stopped that from happening. He can’t get the image of Shuuichi on his floor out of his mind as much as he wants it out.

Shuuichi hands it to him happily, giving him a little smile. “Of course! Oh, uh, how was your day Ouma-kun?”

“Um. Well…” Shuuichi’s not going to judge him. Shuuichi’s openly trans and bi. “I went on a date, uh, at least that’s what I thought it was. It was with a girl and I kind of realized I don’t actually like girls at all. I’m gay.”

“That’s really great Ouma-kun!” Shuuichi seemed to deflate at the ‘I went on a date’ part, but perked up as Kokichi finished his sentence. He taps his fingers together awkwardly. “Do… you have an actual crush on anyone? Um, if you don’t want to tell me you don’t have to!”

Kokichi thinks about it for a second. Does he? That’s a good question. He takes a hit and hums to himself. “Dunno, I guess. People don’t really tend to like me that much.” He laughs a bit, hoping that Shuuichi takes his little slip-up as a joke.

“I like you Ouma-kun!” Shuuichi flashes him a huge smile, grabbing both of Kokichi’s hands in his own.

“Gh-!” Kokichi’s face goes red and he closes his eyes, turning his face a bit to the side. “Y-you’re a good friend, yeah, Saihara.”

..Maybe he does have a little crushy crushy after all.

“Um, do you want to spend the night together? I don’t really wanna be alone, I think I just wanna be around you right now. We can do anything you want i-if you want to stay with me. I could take you to an arcade! Or to the mall, or maybe we could watch some movies and stay here, or maybe-”

Kokichi interrupts Shuuichi’s rambling. “Never really been to an arcade before. But I don’t have much money on me.”

Shuuichi clasps his hands together, still holding on to Kokichi’s own hands. He pulls them towards his chest and bounces up and down a bit. “I’ll pay! My Uncle doesn’t like my parents and doesn’t have any kids and I’m the only one in his will so I’ve got a lot of money now! I even got this house, though it’s a lot of upkeep and I might sell it before I audition for Danganronpa. Hey, maybe you can move in with me!” He pauses, now sweating a bit. “Ah.. that was a bit forward… Let’s just talk about the arcade now! I’ll win you any prize you want, Ouma-kun!”

Kokichi’s still trying to follow what he’s saying. Moving in with Shuuichi? That sounds simultaneously good And bad. He doesn’t pull his hands back from Shuuichi, hoping that the blush on his face is more of a feeling than a sight. “Yeah, the arcade sounds nice, Saihara. When would we go? I’m not sitting in a car while the driver’s high.”

“We can take the metro then. We’ll have to walk a few blocks, but I’ll pay for the both of us. Oh, and there’s a really nice Bubble Tea place near it, and we could go to the movie theatre and watch something after too maybe!” Shuuichi’s rambling again, almost like he’s daydreaming about doing these things with Kokichi. He absolutely is, actually. But he stops himself, opening his eyes and looking back at Kokichi. “I’m excited to go to the arcade with you Ouma-kun! If there’s anything else I can do to make up for stuff, I’ll do anything. Since I owe you a lot for that, haha.”

“Don’t mention it.” The way Kokichi says this isn’t just in a ‘haha it’s okay you don’t gotta do anything’ way, it’s in a ‘really, really, don’t mention that you MURDERED SOMEONE and I HID EVIDENCE’ way. Kokichi’s not sure he’ll ever get over that. It’s probably going to be another thing he bottles up and suppresses.

Shuuichi gives him a thumbs up. “Gotcha! Thumbs up.”

They walk to the nearest metro station, talking about whatever’s on their minds. Shuuichi will occasionally stop and look around, once even putting a hand on Kokichi’s shoulder almost protectively but pretending like it’s nothing when asked. Kokichi has an easier time talking to Shuuichi now than he does most people. It’s something he hasn’t noticed yet, though it’s something that Shuuichi definitely notices.

He plays with one of the chains on his belt and reaches up towards his hat out of habit. “Y’know, I know you’re not that social of a person, but you’ve really opened up to me lately, Ouma-kun! It’s nice hearing your voice when you’re actually happy!”

“Huh?” Kokichi raises an eyebrow, hands still in his sweatshirt pockets. “Oh. Guess I just lose track of what I’m talking about or something.” That’s all he can bring himself to say on the matter. It’s true that he’s more relaxed around Shuuichi, even after the events of today. He actually looks forward to going to lunch, when he’s able to catch up with Shuuichi and sometimes Gonta. The times they’ve hung out after school have made going home more bearable. For once in his life he’s got something that makes him truly happy.

Shuuichi looks down at him with a huge lopsided smile. He spots the metro station and grabs Kokichi’s hand, leading the way. “Cmon, Ouma-kun! I’ll lead the way. It tends to get kinda crowded, but you can hold onto me so we don’t lose each other.”

“Oh um-! Okay,” Kokichi responds. He’s started to get used to how often Shuuichi holds his hand, the desire to pull away no longer being there. He stares at the place they connect and wraps his fingers around Shuuichi’s own for the first time.

And that makes Shuuichi literally melt. He uses his free hand to pull the brim of his hat nearly completely over his face, and he keeps accidentally messing up getting their tickets because of it. Eventually he gets them, boarding the metro and grabbing ahold of one of the bars. Their hands are sweaty and it’s sort of uncomfortable to keep it up but neither one dares pull away.

Someone knocks against Kokichi’s back, pushing him against Shuuichi’s chest. Kokichi, who is prepared for public situations but not in a good way, spits on the man’s back and tells him to watch it. The man doesn’t realize or hear him, so a scene isn’t started. That would kind of ruin the date thingy they’re going on.

“Wow, you spit on that guy pretty fast, Ouma-kun.” Shuuichi wraps an arm around Kokichi without thinking.

“I usually pool a bunch of spit in my mouth in public so I can spit in someone’s face if they bother me.” Kokichi turns his head to face Shuuichi, only now realizing that they’re chest to chest. He has half a mind to either yank himself away or even just bury his face in Shuuichi’s green trenchcoat.

“I’d let you spit on me any day.” Shuuichi realizes he said that out loud. “Eee… forget what I said.”

Kokichi conveniently couldn’t understand what he said. “Huh?”

Shuuichi reaches up for his hat and looks to the side, just laughing awkwardly in response. Kokichi’s sort of way too busy focusing on Shuuichi’s hand gently placed on his back. He normally gets upset or pissy about being touched, but he doesn’t feel that urge when it’s Shuuichi doing it. Maybe he’s grown used to it. Maybe he’s even a bit fond of it…

“Ouma-kun! Ouma-kun! Look over here!” Shuuichi drags Kokichi over to a giant claw machine. The arcade is a generic theme, but there’s a large section of Danganronpa arcade games. Some are claw games for merchandise, while there are a few games you play for tickets. Shuuichi would rather play the claw games, since there’s not many ticket prizes that he’s interested in or doesn’t already have. He leads Kokichi to the biggest one, probably bigger than Kokichi’s room, filled with large plushies of a black and white bear and a pink and white rabbit. There’s a bit of a line, and a sign that says ‘10 TRIES MAX, 1 PRIZE ALLOWED PER DAY’.

“Ohhh, there’s Monokuma stuffed animals in here.” Kokichi hopes he got the name right. He doesn’t know what the pink rabbit is though, he didn’t even know there was more than one animal. In another machine he sees smaller keychain plushes of even MORE Monokuma-type characters. It’s almost frustrating just seeing them and remembering that he’s still keeping up his lie of loving Danganronpa.

Shuuichi inserts a few coins from a small coin purse. “I’ve never been able to get any of these…. They’re impossible to find online for less than like 250 thousand UC ….and that’s not even including shipping. Sure, I could probably buy one, but it’ll be a lot cheaper if I win one here! I’ve been trying for a few months though, usually only a few times since the machine is so expensive… There’s always a line. And they only let one person win a prize in a day.”

Kokichi immediately looks the game up on his phone and starts skimming through videos, trying to figure out the strategy for it. These games always seem simple enough, but they’re still always rigged. “There’s probably a good strategy to it that I can figure out.”

“I’m gonna win you one, Ouma-kun!” Shuuichi starts moving the clamp, dropping it on the Monokuma he’s looking to get. He focuses intently, and even Kokichi turns his head up to watch the machine grab the plush. It lifts it up partially, but the grip is too weak on it’s way up and the plush falls. Shuuichi makes a deflating noise. “Yeah… that’s about how it’s gone.”

“Apparently this machine has a function for getting a harder grip or whatever. The person writing this article seems stupid at best though. Here, I’ll try it.” Shuuichi puts in the money for him, moving out of the way and watching. He spends a bit positioning it over a Monokuma, hitting the button once to drop it and then a second time when it’s on the plush, making the clamp close manually.

The two watch in anticipation as it grabs the prize, actually picking it up. It’s a bit too far away from the hole though, and the Monokuma falls right next to it. Kokichi sticks his tongue out and blows a raspberry, really thinking that he had it.

Shuuichi points at the specific one he was going after. “You want a Monokuma, right? I’ll win him for you for sure! Mark my words Ouma-kun, you’re gonna walk out of here with your arms full!”

He uses the same method Kokichi did, having watched him do it the first time. He messes up on his first try, hitting the button too soon. But on his second, it catches the plush right on time. Shuuichi stares as if trying to manifest the Monokuma physically, and it drops into the prize hole. Shuuichi squeals, bouncing up and down and shaking his closed fists in excitement.

“Did you see that!! Did you see it!! I got it for you!!” He kneels down, pushing the large flap and yanking the Monokuma out. When he stands back up he thrusts it towards Kokichi.

Kokichi nods, and slowly wraps his arms around it. As much as he doesn’t care about Danganronpa…. it’s still a gift from Shuuichi. His arms barely fit around its body, head of the plush tucked gently under his chin. He gives Shuuichi a smile. “Yeah, nice job Saihara.”

“Is there any other prizes you want? We can go get some bubble tea and go see a movie after this. Or, uh, anything else you wanted to do.” Shuuichi fidgets with his hands nervously. One of them reaches up for the brim of his hat, and he shoves the other in his pocket.

Thinking back on everything in the day, Kokichi thinks that bubble tea sounds nice.


	15. Halloween

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It's time for Halloween! Tsumugi invites Kokichi and Shuuichi to cosplay together and go to a street party. Shuuichi ditches her and brings Kokichi along to drink and smoke in Gonta's truck bed with Korekiyo, who is Gonta's boyfriend. Kokichi and Korekiyo unlock an achievement in each others friend goals which is 'hear him actually laugh'. It's a fun night.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hehe I really love this chapter!! It's one of my longest so far but definitely one of my faves :3
> 
> TWs: Weed, Alcohol, NSFW jokes

Kokichi knocks on the door to Tsumugi’s house. His years old purple rusted bike sits on her porch, gently set against the wall. It’s about a 45 minute ride for him when he’s not able to get his Dad to drive him, so Kokichi’s already exhausted by the time he gets to her place. His shirt and boxers cling to his skin with sweat despite the cool fall air. Kokichi grips his shirt and shakes the bottom of it up and down to try and air off.

Tsumugi calls down to him from her window, “Coming! Gimme a second, Ouma-kun!” She appears to already be in her Halloween costume, as she’s wearing a long yellow wig, what looks to be an open neck black catsuit, and a matching hat. Kokichi waits for her to come down and unlock the door.

“Here’s your costume, I’m just waiting for Saihara-kun to come.” Tsumugi hands him a bag of accessories, a pair of shoes, and a folded up black piece of clothing.

Kokichi raises an eyebrow. “Saihara’s coming?”

“Yeah. There’s no one else here who does cosplay that isn’t just a leech wanting my clout, and I wanted a full BiBi unit! Love Live is so old but it’s one of the cosplaying classics, like JoJo’s Bizarre Adventure and Boku No Hero Academia! JoJo is still going on too, even though the creator died a while ago. I think part 14 is coming out soon, and the part 10 anime. Anyway… there’s a street party I wanted to go to so I can hand out my cards with my accounts on it. You and Saihara-kun can follow me around and try not to get into trouble.” Tsumugi laughs. “I’ll do your normal hair up since I know you don’t want to walk around in a wig that long.”

“You have to do my hair?” He holds out the folded black costume, letting the dress fall into view. Kokichi cringes a bit. He doesn’t think that Tsumugi gets the memo that he would rather not do it in a public space to appease her trans ally ‘clothing has no gender’ mind. There’s really only one context in which he’s okay with crossdressing, and this isn’t it. “Oh.”

Tsumugi walks around him, wrapping her arms around Kokichi’s waist and setting her chin on his shoulder. “Aw, you sound disappointed… you aren’t, are you?”

“I’m not.” A lie.

She kisses his cheek and ruffles his hair, walking off with a giggle. Kokichi makes sure everything is still in his arms as he makes his way to the closest bathroom to change. It’s simple enough, just a slick and short black dress with some silver ribbon designs, a weird looking red tie, a belt, and a chain that attaches to the tie. There’s two bracelets so he assumes that they go on both of his wrists. The shoes are relatively comfortable, and he decides to just let Tsumugi deal with the two red hair bows later when she does his hair and makeup. He leaves his normal clothes in a corner.

Tsumugi is gone by the time Kokichi exits the bathroom. He thinks about the street party, not exactly wanting to go. He wonders if there’s any way that he can get out of it.

“Ouma-kun!! Ah, Shirogane-san told me that you’d be here. Hi!” The tension in Kokichi’s body leaves him when he hears Shuuichi’s voice.

And dare I say, he smiles, turning around to face the other man. “Hey, Saihara.” Kokichi trails off a bit, having forgotten that Shuuichi was in an outfit matching his own. A black off the shoulder dress pleated at the bottom, multiple gold chains adorning the front. The shoulder length gloves are transparent and appear to have been cut off at the fingers (likely so Shuuichi can use his phone). A belt is around his waist, though it seems to be tied just a bit too tight to really be comfortable. Shuuichi’s also wearing heeled boots, making him even taller than Kokichi (ugh, just a punch in his manlet gut). His normal black makeup is changed to a more red and gold themed one.

“Awww, you look so cute Ouma-kun!” Shuuichi skips forward. Kokichi panics for a second when he sees Shuuichi reaching towards his neck, but he lets out a breath of relief when Shuuichi just fixes his tie. “I knew you’d be such a cute Nico. Can’t believe Shirogane-san is just ruining Elicchi like that though…”

Kokichi looks to the side, laughing a bit awkwardly and rubbing his arm at the compliments. “Yeah… It wasn’t really my choice in the matter. I don’t know how much I want to be wearing a dress. Especially in public. Shirogane says she wants us all to go to a street party.” Kokichi quickly trails off as he sees Tsumugi coming down the stairs.

“Oh! You’re here. Saihara-kun, are you going to wear a wig?” It’s the first thing she asks, her tone rude.

“I brought mine, but I actually didn’t really feel like wearing it out. I’ll have it on for pictures though!” Shuuichi does in fact bring a frizzy red wig out, setting it down on Tsumugi’s kitchen counter. He pulls his phone out and starts typing fast.

Tsumugi frowns, probably because she thinks Shuuichi is going to look ugly without the wig, but covers it up with a smile. “Ouma-kun! Let’s get your hair and makeup done. I’ll go really light since you have a tendency to wipe it off when you’re in it for a while. Come here baby boy.” She speaks that last part in almost a sing-song tone.

Kokichi walks up towards her, letting Tsumugi ruffle his hair and run her hand down his cheek. He gulps, the two of them locking eyes. She stares hard into his own, the glare of her glasses just barely blocking those piercing grey eyes. Kokichi looks away first and moves away from Tsumugi’s hand. “As long as you aren’t gonna put hairspray in. Let’s go.”

He walks with Tsumugi to her own bathroom, where she immediately begins trashing Shuuichi’s appearance to him while she puts his hair up into pigtails. Kokichi doesn’t pay attention to what she’s saying, instead just staring at his own reflection in the mirror. It’s not something he really likes. Thankfully Tsumugi doesn’t remove the one bandage on his face covering a pimple that he picked at too much.

“-And oh my god, I can’t BELIEVE he would cut the fingers off those gloves. The resale value on that cosplay is going to plummet, but no one worth anything would buy from him anyway-” Yeah, Kokichi tunes her out again, that’s some bullshit right there. He’s gotten to be a professional at ignoring her when she’s talking bad about Shuuichi. It’s all she seems to be doing whenever he’s with her.

Tsumugi moves in front of him, grabbing a palate and doing some minimal red makeup and thin eyeliner. She puts a bit of red lipstick on the middle of his lips and fades it out with some lipgloss. That seems to satisfy her, and she clicks the palate closed.

“So! Ouma-kun, let’s get a few pictures all together.” She stops talking to Kokichi for a second to yell down the stairs for Shuuichi to get his wig on. “When we’re done as a group you and Saihara-kun can go on to the street party and wait for me. He knows where it is, so you can just follow him.”

“... Alright.” Kokichi allows Tsumugi to lead him into another room for pictures. There’s a camera already set up, along with a grey backdrop across the wall. She turns a few white floodlights on as well as a ringlight. Shuuichi enters the room, now with that poofy red wig on. He smiles at Kokichi, moving beside him.

“I’ll help pose you two. The camera’s just on automatic, so you’ll have to hold the pose for a bit while we wait for it to take.” Tsumugi skips to the area where they’re supposed to shoot, beckoning the two boys towards her.

Shuuichi gestures for Kokichi to follow him, looking around at Tsumugi’s windows a bit as they go to her photoshoot room. The shoot doesn’t take too long, it’s mostly just Tsumugi posing Kokichi and nitpicking at Shuuichi’s poses, going to activate the camera, and rushing back and quickly posing herself. Kokichi’s not sure he actually wants to see the pictures.

For the last one, Shuuichi puts both his hands on Kokichi’s shoulders. “Ouma-kun, for this one you’re gonna be sitting on the ground, I’ll guide you. It’s one of the canon images that Shirogane-chan wants to recreate.” He watches Kokichi sit his butt down, and kneels down behind him. “... Ah, this is gonna be a little awkward! Sorry.”

And he was right! Shuuichi wraps both his hands over Kokichi’s shoulders and directs one of Kokichi’s hands to a resting place on Shuuichi’s arm. Kokichi’s heart skips a beat as he feels Shuuichi’s cheek press against the side of his head. Kokichi doesn’t think he’s that bad of a visible blusher, hoping that it can’t be seen in the picture that Tsumugi takes.

She flips through the camera roll, deleting one or two. Tsumugi looks up at the two boys who are now standing like dumbasses and sets the camera back up on the stand. “Alright, you two head to the party. Neither of you can take pictures well, so I’ll be taking them myself.” Kokichi can see Shuuichi visibly deflate at the comment.

“A-alright, thanks for the pictures Shirogane-chan! Make sure to email them to me so the quality isn’t destroyed.” Shuuichi takes his wig off, shaking out his hair. He looks awkward without his hat, but Kokichi can help but stare. Kokichi thinks he looks better without it, but he’s not going to say anything unless he can very much mask his words.

“The quality is already destroyed with you in them,” Tsumugi laughs and turns around, fiddling with the lights while she expects Shuuichi and Kokichi to leave. Kokichi almost laughs at her insult.

Kokichi clears his throat, the two of them now in Tsumugi’s living room. He looks up at Shuuichi, who’s putting the cosplay wig in his backpack. Shuuichi grabs his hat, putting it on his head. It always covers up quite a bit of his face, though Kokichi’s short enough that it just casts a shadow and doesn’t block it. “What’s the deal with your hat?”

Shuuichi looks up, though he doesn’t look Kokichi in the eye. “Aha… a lot of people think it’s because I’m a pervert, which is… uh.” He seems to avoid that question that he put upon himself. “I don’t like making eye contact that much so the hat helps with it. And it’s a lot easier to hide my face.”

“I think you look good without it,” Kokichi blurts out, not really thinking that much. He realizes that Shuuichi might think that he’s judging the hat, and tries to correct it without sounding like he cares. “But I don’t care either way.”

The first comment has Shuuichi pulling the hat further down his flushed face and sputtering out a reply. “You think I look good..!?”

“I-!” Kokichi looks away, biting his lip. “What’s the right answer to that. Because if I answer that puts me in a hole.” He points at Shuuichi almost accusatory-like. “You’re putting me in a hole!”

Shuuichi laughs at Kokichi’s antics, grabbing his hat and putting it into his backpack. “Aha… I suppose if you really like how I look without my hat I won’t wear it tonight.”

Kokichi pouts and huffs, looking to the side while fiddling with the hem of his costume dress. “I didn’t say that…”

“Too late, I’ve already committed your words to memory and am going to think about them later and get all giggly.” That doesn’t sound like a lie honestly. Shuuichi grabs his backpack, pulling it over his shoulders. “Wanna head?”

“Yeah, let’s head out.” Kokichi’s voice is neutral, not wanting to go to the street party. He frowns, following Shuuichi to the door.

Shuuichi looks back at him a few times, and once they're out of sight of Tsumugi’s house he grabs Kokichi’s hand. “Follow me, Ouma-kun! We’re headed this way!”

Kokichi stares at their connected hands for only a second before stumbling forward, now trying to match Shuuichi’s pace. He’s not too fast, but fast enough that Kokichi can’t pull out his phone and not pay attention to where they’re going. “Huh? You’re that excited for the street party?”

“Haha, not exactly.” Shuuichi laughs a bit awkwardly, looking back at Kokichi every so often, sometimes stopping like he heard something but continuing on after a seconds pause. Kokichi has no choice but to follow along to the end of the neighborhood.

Two cars are parked in a dead end, and he spots two figures in one of the cars.

“Huh? This isn’t the party. Saihara, what’s-?”

Shuuichi slaps the back of the occupied truck twice, shouting, “Hey, we’re here!” He tosses his backpack on the ground.

The two people get out of the car. Kokichi immediately recognizes Gonta, and he’s… wearing a hot pink sleeveless dress that’s quite small on him. Next to exit is Korekiyo, who Kokichi had no idea even associated with Gonta. And even more odd is the fact that Korekiyo’s got on a long sleeve lacey flowing black dress. Are they matching or something? Going for an opposite prep-goth Look? Kokichi raises an eyebrow in question, though he supposes that they can do what they want fashion-wise.

“Heyyyy! Shuuichi!” Gonta slams his car door shut, doing an awkward shuffle towards the two. “And Ouma I guess. Came here just like you said! Though I had to drag Kiyo along for a thrift store run for mine. He already had one.”

“You’re friends with Shinguuji?” Kokichi asks.

Gonta laughs, loud. “FRIENDS? Haha, hey, Kiyo, do friends share tender kisses and fuck ea-”

“Cease that talk! We are in front of other people, do you not have common sense?!” Korekiyo walks around the car quickly, black heels clicking on the pavement. He puts a hand to his mouth as if his mask isn’t already covering his face. 

Shuuichi raises a finger. “Actually, I’ve had brosex about..” He starts counting on his fingers and gets to his second hand before Korekiyo lightly slaps his hands apart. 

“I refuse to stay here if you are all going to just talk about that. Is there no decency in this group?” Korekiyo huffs and crosses his arms, pointing his nose in the air like a prick.

“I wasn’t talking about it though,” Kokichi points out, defending himself from Korekiyo’s accusation. “Why are you here? And what’s going on, I thought Shirogane, Saihara, and me were all gonna be going to a street party.”

Gonta elbows Shuuichi as if telling him to answer. Shuuichi laughs a bit, turning to Kokichi with his hands behind his back almost playfully. “Well, uh, you said you didn’t really like wearing a dress in public and you looked like you weren’t gonna have fun at the street party… so I thought it would be better to hang out on Halloween as a group! I texted Gonta to come wearing a dress so you could be more comfortable knowing we were all wearing them, and he brought his boyfriend along too since they were out for a date.”

“Boyfriend.” Korekiyo almost scoffs, turning to Gonta. “I.. suppose these two can be trusted with that information. Despite being…” He wrinkles his nose at Kokichi and Shuuichi. “... Themselves of all people.”

“Prick.” Kokichi rolls his eyes at Korekiyo, just insulting him outright.

Shuuichi, the lovable idiot he is, interrupts everyone before they can start fighting. He whines loudly and dramatically, draping himself over Gonta and putting his face in the taller man’s chest. “Gontaaaaaaaa… My thighs are chafing. Help.”

“Do I look like someone that carries around Goldbond? Whaddaya want me to do, spread your legs?” Gonta laughs loud at his own joke, reaching over and slapping a hand over Korekiyo’s mouth before he can say something like ‘tch you are so vulgar tch I’m Korekiyo and I’ve got a 12 inch stick up my booty hole 24/7’.

Shuuichi chuckles a bit too, moving a bit away from Gonta so he’s no longer draped over him. “Find a cute boy who’ll put his head between them for me.”

Gonta points directly at Kokichi. Kokichi, who was not paying attention, looks up from his phone and realizes that he’s being pointed at. “.. Why is he pointing at me.”

“Don’t worry about it. Hey Kiyo does this make my ass look fat as hell or what?” Gonta laughs , turning his ass sideways towards the group.

Korekiyo huffs and lightly swats Gonta’s hand away from him, a blush on his cheeks peeking out from under his mask. His response is a low grumble. “... I suppose.”

“The correct answer is yes actually. I have enough for the both of us. SO anyway Shuuichi, I’ve got some beer in my truck and some blankets and pillows to put in the truck bed. How does a double stargazing date sound?” Gonta opens the back of his truck, grabbing a cooler and handing it to Shuuichi. He tosses a huge pile of blankets and a few pillows into the truck bed, and hops into it. The whole car sways.

Kokichi can’t even bring himself to question the double date comment. He crawls up after Gonta, watching the guy help his boyfriend up. Shuuichi sets the cooler on the floor and he himself climbs up. He sets his backpack down and pulls out a hello kitty makeup bag with a strong weed smell.

“I’ll let you guys take the weed. I can’t smoke, so just don’t blow it on me. Kiyo, you gonna have anything?” Gonta elbows Korekiyo, who’s nuzzled right up next to Gonta, and he puts his arm over Korekiyo’s shoulder.

Korekiyo watches Kokichi take the first bottle, and he points towards the cooler. “I will be having both. As long as I am back to sobriety and home by 6 in the morning there will be no issue. Could one of you hand me a bottle then?”

“Yeah. Are we pulling an allnighter then?” Kokichi asks. He’s not opposed to spending a whole night drinking and smoking, though he always gets tired with alcohol.

“I’d be fine with it! I brought my meds with me to take when I need them, and I grabbed your clothes from Shirogane-san’s bathroom.” Shuuichi gestures to Kokichi. He leans over to the cooler and grabs three for himself, Gonta, and Korekiyo. “Just don’t use all my weed. I have a bunch but I still want some left over.”

The group is undisturbed by anyone, funny life stories and other information being passed around. Shuuichi talks about the times he’s been possessed and shows his latest cosplay content, while Gonta talks about all of the plant and bug species around them, and Korekiyo talks about Edo Japan and Italy during the Renaissance. Even Kokichi takes breaks from drinking and smoking to tell a few funny stories.

“And the baseball hit him right in the nuts Again. Never asked me to pitch the next time we played together, my Dad just decided he’d rather me be a batter than a pitcher.” Kokichi laughs, finishing the last of his second bottle.

Korekiyo’s moved to Gonta’s lap, letting his boyfriend play with his hair as much as he wants. Shuuichi and Kokichi have scooted closer together, sharing a third bowl between the two of them. The slight touch of their thighs together makes Kokichi’s heart skip a beat.

“Why’d you quit baseball, Ouma-kun? From what you’ve told me you were really good at it!” Shuuichi runs a hand through his own hair, shooting Kokichi a smile.

“Oh, uh. I guess I just lost interest. I could never really do competitive sports, and that’s all there is when you’re older than like, thirteen. Plus you know the baseball team hates me, especially since Momota’s on the team.” Kokichi takes a hit of Shuuichi’s bowl and hands it back to him. “Have the rest, I’m goooood.”

“You are certainly wobbling while seated, Ouma-san.” Korekiyo says as if he’s not fully leaning against Gonta to support himself.

Kokichi points at him and squints. “As if you didn’t just go on a ten minute rant about like, the history of Japan.”

“It is the Edo period, you would do well to respect and learn it further. Mind you, I am not failing my classes.” Korekiyo squints back at him.

“You’re both off your asses and we’ve all had a BALL of a time just talking about shit! Anyway, who wants to hear everything I know about the Gaboon Viper.” Gonta immediately pulls out his phone to show a very handsome large snake.

“Tsuchinoko…” Korekiyo mumbles.

“He kind of looks like you,” Kokichi says, looking between Gonta and the snake. He points, almost a limpwrist at this point. “Here’s a question. What the fuck made you so ripped. You’re literally a bear.”

Gonta beams and cackles, throwing his arms out to the side and flexing. He’s a soft, natural kind of strong. Part of Kokichi’s jealous. “Kickboxing babey!! And hunting and hitting the gym for like all my life! My Mom didn’t want me to look like my Dad- he’s about my height but she really doesn’t like his stomach or whatever- so they had me working out at a pretty young age.”

Yeah, it’s unacceptable. Kokichi won’t say out loud that he can relate to the weight-conscious and extremely judgy mother figure. “I don’t think anyone should be bodyshamed actually especially including men.” Kokichi clicks his tongue, almost about to go on an awkward ramble about how he thinks all different body types of men are attractive.

“Haha let’s get off this topic.” Shuuichi says a bit too loudly and abruptly, rummaging around the bottles of beer in hopes that there’s any left in any bottles. The group falls into a short period of awkward silence.

Kokichi bites his lip, thinking about his bike left at Tsumugi’s porch. If he’s not going back there, he needs to at least grab it. Kokichi grabs the side of the truck, standing up on weak legs. “My bike’s still at Shirogane’s. I gotta go grab it.”

“Whoa, whoa, sit your butt down. You aren’t in any shape to be walking all the way over there Ouma. Hey, how about I go grab it for you?” Gonta suggests, reaching a hand up to try and stabilize Kokichi.

It gets swatted away, but Kokichi plops his butt right on down. “... Fine.”

“I’ll go with you so you don’t get lost Gonta!” Shuuichi’s high tolerance comes in handy sometimes, as he’s able to walk like a normal decent sober person. The two wave Kokichi and Korekiyo goodbye and set off for Shirogane’s house.

The silence that follows is pretty awkward. Kokichi pulls out his phone, but Korekiyo only owns a flip phone and as such doesn’t have much to go to for mindless entertainment. When Kokichi looks up at him for the fifth time, Korekiyo tilts his head like he’s about to ask a question.

“... That dress. I know you are wearing one. Are you… oh I really should hold my tongue but we are beyond that point. Could you be nonbinary perhaps?” He speaks the last part like someone could overhear and beat the shit out of him.

Kokichi frowns. “No. I’m just a guy. Shirogane had me dress up like this.”

“Oh. Nevermind then..” He sounds nervous, reaching up to fiddle with his mask.

A few seconds pass. Kokichi licks his chapped lips and raises an eyebrow up at Korekiyo. “Are… are YOU nonbinary?”

It was a bit easy for Kokichi to guess, but Korekiyo’s look of nervousness grows. His eyes dart back and forth and he speaks again in an even lower tone. “Yes but, mind your business. My inhibitions are lowered currently so do not think you can bring this up at a later time with me.”

“Dude I don’t care about that stuff, my lips are sealed tighter than your ass.” He pauses. “Should I like, change pronouns for you or..?”

“No, that means less than the identity itself. Continue as normal. My… butthole. Is not tight, either. So do not… Wait a second. Wait a second. That is NOT what I meant-!”

Kokichi laughs as Korekiyo stumbles over his words, vehemently denying ‘anything butthole related’, though Korekiyo himself starts snorting trying to hold back his laughs. Their laughter is contagious and eventually the two of them are lying on the truck bed laughing their little butts off. He’s never heard Korekiyo’s laughter before. But thinking about it, Korekiyo’s never heard Kokichi’s own before either.

“Heyyy we’re back with your bike Ouma!” Gonta’s carrying it over his shoulder like it’s nothing. He makes a questioning noise hearing Korekiyo and Kokichi laugh, leaning over the side of the truck to see what all the fuss is about. “Hey, you guys better not have done anything funny without me!”

Korekiyo huffs and tries silence to himself, snorting a bit loud. “It was not that funny!”

“No it was funny but I think Shinguuji’s too embarrassed to say it again.” Kokichi makes a ‘lips zipped’ motion to Korekiyo, causing Gonta to groan at not being in on the joke.

Shuuichi hops back into the truck bed, sitting next to Kokichi with a smile. “Aww I knew you two would eventually get along!”

“Even if you’re both massive dickwads!” Gonta laughs a bit to himself, hopping in after Shuuichi. Korekiyo instantly cuddles up to him, nuzzling against Gonta’s chest. His large hand runs through Korekiyo’s hair, and a kiss is planted on his forehead. Gonta tilts his boyfriend’s chin up and gives him another kiss, this time on his lips. “Awww, are you tired baby?”

Korekiyo shakes his head no. He just nuzzles back up against Gonta and sits in his lap. When Kokichi looks over at Shuuichi, the other man is looking at them with a smile, eyes unfocused. Shuuichi notices that he’s looking, turning towards Kokichi as his smile grows.

“Are you tired at all Ouma-kun?” Shuuichi asks.

Kokichi shakes his head no, but he’s sluggish when crossfaded. He leans against the side of the truck bed, accidentally resting his head on Shuuichi’s shoulder but not caring enough to move. He mumbles something that even he can’t understand and when he opens his eyes again he’s in someone’s lap. A hand gently moves through his hair, no longer being up in pigtails anymore. There’s comfort to that touch, and he closes his eyes.

Hey remember all those posts about how you should never sleep in a binder? Well you really shouldn’t. Kokichi groans and brings a hand up to rub the sleep out of his eyes. His chest feels absolutely awful, and his cheek is stuck to something warm. When he reaches up to feel what he’s laying on, he hears Shuuichi speak.

“Oh, you’re up Ouma-kun!”

“Hrgnghn.” Kokichi slowly raises his head and looks down, seeing Shuuichi’s bare thighs and probably catching a glimpse of his underwear. He looks back up, blinking wearily.

Shuuichi smiles, no longer wearing the costume from the night before. He’s just got on a t-shirt, and it looks like they’re at his house. “You were out cold haha.”

Gonta clears his throat. “You humped his leg.”

“He did NOT hump my leg you’re embarrassing him Gonta..!” Shuuichi shoots him a look that makes Gonta cackle. He looks back down at Kokichi, face red. “... Aha. So anyway, we went back to my house after dropping Shinguuji-kun off. Gonta and I changed into normal clothes but you were just kinda clinging to me so that’s why I don’t have pants on but if it makes you feel more comfortable I can go put pants on and-”

“I need to change outta this.” Kokichi pushes himself off of Shuuichi and stumbles back, falling onto his butt.

Shuuichi points to a nearby pile of clothes. “These are yours, the bathroom’s just right there and there’s a lock on it too.”

“Thanks.” Kokichi’s voice is practically a wheeze and he gathers his clothes up quick to change. He’s gonna be in pain for a while. When he looks in the mirror none of the makeup from the previous night is there, it looks like Shuuichi took it off for him. Which is pretty nice of him to do. He spends a bit in there to clean up and change and wake himself up.

When Kokichi exits he finds Shuuichi and Gonta in the kitchen talking, and a glass of water and two ibuprofen set on the kitchen island for him. He smiles, and joins in on the conversation. The texts he got from Tsumugi can be ignored for now.


	16. Spy Conspiracy

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A new oddball character Maki Harukawa steals Kokichi away because she thinks that Kaede is secretly a spy, and as an "assassin", Maki wants to take her out. That's not good.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is how Maki should have been written in canon, actually
> 
> TWs: Violence

It takes three months of school for Maki Harukawa to start following Kokichi again. He only notices her today, when he looked up during his class to see her staring at him through the little window in the door. She signs something to him, but of course Kokichi doesn’t know sign language, so he has no idea what she’s saying or signalling. He rolls his eyes, and goes back to his work. 

She’s waiting for him at the door when he exits.

Kokichi’s heart skips a beat and his lip curls. Trying to ignore her, he bows his head and wills her to leave.

“Ouma. Did you get my message. Through the window, I didn’t text you. I don’t have your number. But if I did it would have said what I signalled to you.” She speaks monotonously, eyes cold.

“Oh my god, leave me alone. My next class is all the way across the building and if I don’t speedwalk I won’t get there on time,” He grumbles just loud enough for her to hear and starts to try and power walk away.

It’s all for naught, though, as he’s tugged into an unoccupied teacher’s bathroom.

“Ouma, does this new development not shock you? Surprise you? Make your stomach wrench with dread? Chill you to your very core and worm it’s way into your bone marrow and eat away until you’re weak?” Maki Harukawa does not touch people. She stands exactly a foot away from him, glaring down with a piercing gaze. She hadn’t even grabbed Kokichi, only his backpack. But she still boxes him in.

“If you make me wear a tin foil hat again, I’m going to-”

“There’s a spy in this school- a traitor, and I found her identity.” Maki pulls out a giant, mostly used notebook from her messenger bag, and starts flipping through the pages. Kokichi groans, catching glimpses of her self insert assassin original character (which is a whole other story for that matter). Until she flips to a certain page, filled with blurry pictures of a blonde student.

Kokichi squints. “Is… that Akamatsu?”

“You noticed so fast. Quite the impressive character trait.” Maki turns the notebook around to face Kokichi. There’s a certain picture of Kaede grabbing a butterfly knife from her waistband- the same one used on Kokichi. The knife is circled with red paint pen and there are tons of red arrows pointing to it. There’s another closeup picture of Kaede’s knife that is Also circled with red arrows despite it being the only thing in the picture.

Maki clears her throat and spits her gum out onto her hand. She grabs a new piece from her pocket and sticks it in her mouth, holding her chewed gum out towards Kokichi. “I’ll explain as best I can while we have privacy from spying eyes. Would you like some gum.”

He looks down at the spit covered wad in disgust. “No.”

“Your loss.” She loudly chews her new stick. “Knives aren’t allowed in the school. You already know my theories on this place being a…” Maki’s voice drops to an even lower whisper. “... spy training site. Why would Akamatsu have a knife if she wasn’t a spy?”

Kokichi wants to groan and maybe smack her. “Oh my god. Don’t you and Momota have knives? Wouldn’t that make you spies too?”

She shakes her head no, and scoffs like the answer is obvious. “Your quips are perfect for that of a sidekick. No, because we’re assassins. And assassins need to be prepared for an attack at any time. They took my last knife away last time, but I won’t let them win again.”

“Can I leave now. I don’t want to be a part of whatever this is. It’s bad enough you dragged me into your conspiracy theories last year because you thought Shinguuji was an alien. I’m gonna be late and someone’s gonna think something is up.” Kokichi leans his body to the side a bit, trying to signal to Maki that yes he really wants and needs to leave.

“I know Akamatsu’s schedule. I memorized every action she takes and wrote it down.” Maki flips to the next page and runs her finger along it, stopping at a certain spot. “She should be on the basement stairs near the art hallway smoking. Come on.”

Maki grabs Kokichi’s backpack and starts dragging him out of the bathroom. Kokichi tries to worm his way out, but Maki’s hand grip is that of steel. He can’t just leave his backpack (his wallet and keys are in there after all), so he sits down on the floor and just lets Maki drag him by the back of his backpack. Hey, if a teacher sees him, there’s less of a chance that he’s the one getting in trouble if he looks like the victim.

On the other hand, the person they’re approaching will be less forgiving.

“There she is,” whispers Maki. She ducks behind a wall, just barely peeking out to look at Kaede. Kokichi sighs, soft enough that Kaede doesn’t hear, and peeks out as well. True to Maki’s word, Kaede is sitting on the staircase with a cigarette in her mouth. She looks to be on her phone taking pictures, though she retakes them over and over again until she gets the one she likes. It’s looking like she thinks she’s ugly in all of them though, evidenced by the noise of disgust and anger at her own appearance.

“Okay, what are you even planning on doing?” Kokichi moves back behind the wall, trying to eye an escape route.

Maki pulls out her knife. “Take Akamatsu out.”

“What!?” Kokichi whisper-shouts, turning directly to Maki and holding his hands up almost defensively. “She’s gonna kick your ass Harukawa. More importantly if she sees me here I won’t hear the end of it.”

“You’re so quirky, Ouma. I’ll put an end to her as silently as possible so you don’t squeal.” Maki grips the knife with expertise, taking a few deep breaths as she looks out where Kaede is on the stairs.

Kokichi rolls his eyes and stands up. No way in hell is he defending Kaede of all people, but he wants no part in this. His torn up shoes squeak against the shitty school tile, and he hears Kaede sigh and stand up.

“Are you following me, freak?”

He twists his head to the side to glance behind him, getting a visual on where both Kaede and Maki are. Maki puts a finger to her lips and tries to shoosh him. She signs something to him yet again and trains her eyes to Kaede. Kaede hasn’t noticed her yet, and she just slowly advances towards Kokichi.

“I’m trying to get to class. Not everything is about you, why would I follow some bitch who’s just gonna try to stab me if I come within 10 feet of her,” Kokichi spits out his insult, not having anyone else’s shit today. He’s already late for class and just having to see Kaede makes his day even worse. He watches her move closer out of the corner of his eye and fully turns around, raising his arms to a defensive position.

“Sneak attack,” he hears Maki say, and she launches out towards Kaede with her pretty knife in one hand.

Kaede shrieks and whips around as soon as she hears Maki’s footsteps. She grabs Maki’s wrist with both hands and stumbles back, the tip of the knife digging into her stomach.

As much as Kokichi doesn’t want to watch, his eyes remain glued to the fight before him. He puts his hand against the wall, watching Kaede knee Maki in the stomach and try desperately to you know, not get a knife shoved in her. He almost has the urge to laugh, as sick as that sounds.

“What the hell?? Who do you think you are, sneaking up on me like that! I’ll kill you for this!” Kaede pushes Maki towards the wall, trying to gain the upper hand that way.

“I’m a trained assassin here to kill you for being a spy,” is what Maki answers with.

“.. What on earth?”

Kaede’s nails dig into Maki’s skin, probably drawing blood underneath of them. Maki’s hands are trapped gripping on the knife, and her back hits the wall. The two girls are stuck there- Maki trying to keep Kaede from pushing the knife away while getting repeatedly kicked, and Kaede trying to kick at her while keeping the knife from stabbing her further.

“This is crazy. I’m not being a witness to murder today.” Kokichi takes a step back, and looks around. He turns tail and starts running, looking around to see if there’s anyone who could actually get involved.

With luck, he finds someone who probably could do it. With bad luck, it’s Kaito.

Kaito slowly walks down the hallway, in the direction of the staircase Kaede was in. That’s right, he’s probably walking there to silently smoke with Kaede. They’re sort of friends from what Kokichi knows, but they don’t really talk much. Kokichi slowly approaches him, hands up like he’s already deescalating a fight.

“Momota, it’s a long story but Harukawa’s trying to kill Akamatsu and they’re kind of already fighting.”

“Mm?” Kaito looks down at him as if he expects Kokichi to do something sneaky like punch his dick or steal whatever’s in his pocket. He raises a hand to his ear and squints one eye. “Run that by me again?”

“Harukawa pulled a knife on Akamatsu and is probably currently stabbing her in the stomach so like, you should probably stop them because like hell am I risking that fight. You care about Harukawa, right? She’s about thirty seconds away from getting her face cut in half or getting a murder charge.” Kokichi tries to explain it as best he can without seeming worried or anything. He points down the hall, and starts walking the other way. “I don’t want to have police interview me or whatever.”

Kaito doesn’t say anything to laugh at or question him, instead grabbing Kokichi’s arm and dragging him in the direction he had been pointing. “You better not be shitting me or I’ll kill you.”

Kokichi groans, stumbling forward to try and keep up with Kaito. “Ughhhhh, you’ve gotta be kidding me.”

“Suck it up asshole.” Kaito stops, letting go of Kokichi’s arm when he sees Kaede and Maki.

The scene has gotten worse, in fact. Kaede is gripping her stomach in one hand and holding her own knife in the other. Maki is kneeling on the floor against the wall, her nose bleeding. She’s holding her own knife out towards Kaede. Her face is emotionless, not even sparing a glance at Kokichi and Kaito approaching. They’re locked in a stalemate of ‘who’s gonna attack first’.

“Hey! If you don’t drop that knife Akamatsu, I’ll kill you!” Kaito’s voice is rough and it sounds throughout the empty hallway, making both girls spare a glance at him before they lock back in on each other.

Kaede huffs, gripping the fabric of her uniform hard. “This little fucking brat attacked me first! Who the hell do you think you are coming after me? I’ll kill both of you and string you up in the basement.”

“You wouldn’t dare threaten either one of us, bitch,” Kaito growls. He pulls out his own switchblade, clicking it open and holding it as a vague threat towards Kaede.

“I know 47 ways to kill you silently and all of them are painful,” is Maki’s response.

Kokichi grumbles a few insults under his breath and stomps his foot on the ground. “Oh my god all of you just drop the knives already.” His voice isn’t as loud or commanding as Kaito’s, but it makes Kaede look at him with a sneer, and Maki spares a sideways glance at him.

“I’ll drop my knife when she drops hers,” Kaede grumbles, a bead of sweat dripping down the side of her head. She swallows the spit pooling in her mouth and gestures her knife towards Maki.

Kaito looks down at Maki and closes his switchblade. Slow and careful, but not once wavering in his step he approaches the two girls. His voice is firm, but he speaks with a nicer tone than Kokichi’s ever heard from him before. “Maki, drop the knife. I’ve got your back.”

Maki bites her lip, looking back and forth between Kaede and Kaito. She sighs and makes a show out of setting her knife down on the floor. She slowly stands up, both her hands up in the air to show that she’s not going to grab it again. Kaito looks towards Kaede, starting to tell her to drop her knife as well.

“Bitch!” Kaede lunges towards Maki, intent on revenge.

A punch directly to the face stops her.

Kaito growls, bringing his stinging fist back as he hears Kaede’s body fall limp to the tile. He stares down at her with nothing in his eyes but pure disgust. He doesn’t do anything more- no spit or kicks or anything. All he does is look down with a curled lip. “What did I fuckin’ tell you.”

With a gulp Kokichi steps back, eyeing Kaede lying on the floor. She’ll wake up in a few minutes with a concussion probably. He looks back over at Maki and Kaito, seeing Kaito kneel down in front of her and talk quietly. It’s none of his business, but he listens in as he walks away anyways.

“Stop trying this shit, damn it. It’s stupid.”

Maki responds, “I won’t, it makes things more interesting here. You know that, you’ve always stuck by me through it no matter how you feel about it. You won’t stop your shit either so we’re even. Knife trade at 5 on Friday?”

“Bet.”

Kokichi hears them walk their separate ways. The two’s friendship had always weirded him out, it’s not a ‘harmless’ friendship to other people, but weirdos stick together he guesses. That’s what it’s like for him and his friends anyways. He hopes that Maki doesn’t follow him, but he makes it to his next class with no incident other than a berating from the teacher for being late.


	17. McDonalds II (nsfw)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kokichi's at a park completely crossfaded when Shuuichi (also on drugs) and Gonta (sober) arrive. Gonta decides to take them to get some food and sober up. Shuuichi and Kokichi get a liiiittle raunchy.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TWs: NSFW, Alcohol, Weed

Being in a public playground as an adult is always awkward, unless of course it’s 1 am and you’re crossfaded. Kokichi swings back and forth on the swing, uniform sleeves rolled up and the whole thing unbuttoned and swinging in the wind. Kokichi’s wearing a shirt under it anyway, so he doesn’t have much to worry about. His earbuds are in, music turned all the way up.

_”Heyyyyyy"_

_"Hey ouma-kun are you doing anything tonight”_

Kokichi answers the text, nearly falling off the swing while he tries to control it with one hand.

_”in at the park just chilling”_

Kokichi left his house before he could change out of his uniform, just dropping his school stuff off and grabbing his bike and his stolen alcohol and weed before he could be stopped. After an uneventful trip to a few stores for snacks and other drinks, he headed to the park and walked around until he collapsed. Now he’s sitting on the swings with sore legs and a slightly sore ass from the seat. Singing loudly without care.

He’s not the best, though Kokichi as a kid dreamed of being an idol for a while. Listening to the same songs for years means that he’s memorized most of them. But he’d be damned if he ever let anyone listen to him sing. His voice cracks and he slurs over faster parts, laughing at how his voice has been ruined by Testosterone (that and butthair…) and he can’t hit the same notes he used to be able to.

_”Haha we’re nearby maybe i'll see you"_

_"If that’s alright"_

_"I kind of really want t see you because you are bvery important to me!!!!”_

Kokichi doesn’t see Shuuichi’s texts, though he does hear his phone vibrate. He can check them later when he’s not jamming. He slows down, dragging his feet across the mulch and looking up at the moon while he just sings his wee little heart out. His hands hurt from the chains but it doesn’t even bother him. He doesn’t hear Shuuichi’s voice calling for him until his friend is right in front of him and waving.

“HYUH!?” Kokichi jumps back and falls off the swing on his back, groaning at the sudden change of angle as his world spins. One of his earbuds got ripped out in the fall, and he looks up at Shuuichi.

“I said hi Ouma-kun!!! Oh shit I didn’t mean to make you fall I’m sorry-! I’ll help you up!” Shuuichi grips onto the bar holding up the swings, kneeling down and offering his hand to Kokichi.

With a groan Kokichi grabs his hand, sitting up and letting Shuuichi pull him. It’s a bit too hard though, and Kokichi’s head bumps against Shuuichi’s chest. Kokichi chuckles a bit, grabbing Shuuichi’s jacket. “Oops.”

“Hey I’m still here you know!” Actually Kokichi had no idea that Gonta was there too until now. Gonta stands a few feet away from them and looks down. “Man, are you BOTH on drugs?”

Kokichi turns his head slightly, just enough to show Gonta that he’s acknowledged the other’s existence enough to look his general direction. “I am Not sober.”

One of Shuuichi’s hands moves to his back, and Kokichi finds comfort in the warmth surrounding him. He closes his eyes and leans against Shuuichi with a smile. He can stay like this for a while. No one else is allowed to touch him like this. He slowly moves his arms around Shuuichi’s waist, not paying attention to Gonta and Shuuichi talking until Shuuichi shakes his shoulder some.

“Um, Ouma-kun, are you sure you’re okay?”

Kokichi nods. His answer is muffled. “Mmhmm. I don’t wanna let go.”

Shuuichi mumbles something along the lines of ‘Oh my god he’s so cute’ and tightly squeezes Kokichi, bouncing back and forth without saying anything. A noise kinda like a squeaky toy comes out of Kokichi.

Gonta’s rolling his eyes but smiling at them nonetheless. “I’m definitely going to be babysitter, huh. We’re taking a McDonald’s trip and getting you both something to eat.”

“McDonald’s sounds great, Gonta! I can get it for us!” Shuuichi offers.

“If you both can walk without my help. I’m not carrying you guys to McDonald’s, it’ll look like a kidnapping. And then I’ll be accused of being a part of one of those despair gangs! Actually now that I think about it I’m pretty sure that Hoshi has connections to those things. Nasty dudes.” It’s a common occurrence for people to be kidnapped and put into non-legal killing game type dealies. It’s a miracle that Kokichi’s never encountered one of them.

It’s not something Kokichi wants to hear, so he interrupts before Shuuichi can start talking about brutal local unsolved crimes and make Kokichi’s skin crawl. “I can walk. Saihara, if you want something to drink I’ve got some stuff left in my bag. It’s nasty though.”

“I’m good but thanks!” Shuuichi finally lets go, helping Kokichi stand up. He ends up grabbing Kokichi’s bag, which is a lot lighter than usual. Kokichi balls a hand up in Shuuichi’s jacket and leans on him to walk, shivering in the cold fall air.

Shuuichi looks down at him and wraps an arm over his shoulder. “Um, you should probably button your uniform back up, you’re shivering.”

While Kokichi would normally never do this sober, he doesn’t care right now. After he buttons his gakuran back up he grumbles and puts his freezing cold hands under Shuuichi’s jacket, eliciting a shriek from his friend. It makes Gonta cackle as he trails in front of the two, looking back on occasion to make sure they aren’t too far behind.

“O-Ouma-kun-! Geez, um, I’ll hold your hands instead..!” Shuuichi squirms and pushes Kokichi’s hands out from under his shirt, holding them in his own warm and clammy ones. “There, that’s better for both of us.”

Kokichi giggles a bit but doesn’t protest or try to move his hands back under Shuuichi’s shirt. Shuuichi stares down at him, having never heard Kokichi giggle before. Gonta looks back at Kokichi clinging to Shuuichi, giving his best friend a thumbs up as they approach the McDonald’s parking lot.

“Hey, is it okay if I have some of your coke Saihara?” Kokichi points to the cup. He’s gotten pretty thirsty, and he regrets not ordering a drink while the three of them were at the counter earlier...

Shuuichi smiles down at him, grabbing the cup and handing it to Kokichi. “Of course! Have as much as you want, Ouma-kun.”

Kokichi grabs it, taking a few sips at a time. While Shuuichi and Gonta can both easily down drinks, Kokichi doesn’t have the capability to do that. He continues to eat some of his nuggets and drink Shuuichi’s soda, though eventually he hands it back. His brain urges him not to say something stupid and embarassing.

But guess who Does say something stupid and embarassing. Shuuichi laughs a bit, taking a big slurp from his coke. “Haha wow we just indirect kissed!” Another slurp. “What if we accidental kissed and we were both boys.”

Now it’s time for Kokichi to say something stupid back. “What if we kissed.”

“We should kiss.” Shuuichi’s sort of covered in sweat, face growing red. He’s thinking vividly about kissing Kokichi.

Gonta groans. “This is LITERALLY a McDonalds.”

“What if we did.” Kokichi just ignores Gonta. He’s gotten pretty good at that.

Shuuichi brushes some of his own hair behind his ear. It falls right back into place, but it’s the thought that counts. He wipes a bit of sweat off his cheek. “What if we on purpose kissed.”

Kokichi’s heart skips a beat. He moves closer to Shuuichi, almost falling out of his chair. “On purpose?”

“Oh my god guys. We are in PUBLIC.”

When Kokichi looks down he realizes that his hand is right next to Shuuichi’s. He gently reaches for it, lacing their fingers together like they so often do. It’s rare that Kokichi initiates it though. Shuuichi’s smile grows even wider, and he sighs wistfully. He grabs both of Kokichi’s hands, scooting in his chair to face Kokichi.

“Ouma-kun! We should kiss! Right now!”

Kokichi’s face lights up red. “Um!! Okay!” He takes two deep breaths, closing his eyes shut and leaning forward to kiss Shuuichi on the cheek for a very brief period of time. It’s super quick, and Kokichi immediately pulls back, shaking his head some and smiling wider than anyone has ever seen. “I did it, I kissed you, Saihara.”

Gonta’s groaning across from them, shovelling food in his mouth and pretending like he has no idea who these two weirdos are.

“Great! Let’s do it again!” Shuuichi beams, gripping Kokichi’s hands like the other man will be lost if he lets go.

Kokichi’s backed against the wall, but he doesn’t mind in the slightest. He leans a bit closer to Shuuichi. “I am Okay with that.” He gives a little ok hand sign, though it’s hard with Shuuichi gripping his hands.

Shuuichi giggles like a kid going on a rollercoaster. He leans forward and kisses Kokichi on the lips this time. He’s gentle but a bit wobbly, getting his lipstick on Kokichi’s own lips. He slowly lets go of one of Kokichi’s hands, which immediately balls up in Shuuichi’s shirt while they kiss.

A hand slams down on the table. Gonta speaks in a loud whisper, close enough to Shuuichi and Kokichi that it’s still pretty loud. “WE ARE AT A MCDONALDS AND YOU ARE BOTH MAKING OUT!!! You are literally making out in a fast food restaurant. I cannot fucking deal with this.”

Both Kokichi and Shuuichi jump at the noise and pull apart. Kokichi caves in on himself, fully letting go of Shuuichi and wrapping his arms around himself. He’s still only a good foot away from Shuuichi though, since he didn’t have much room to move back.

Shuuichi sighs a bit. “He’s right… We should at least go to the bathroom.”

“Nuh-uh! You guys better not leave me here while you fuck in a McDonald’s bathroom!!” Gonta whines, pointing at Shuuichi and Kokichi. Sure, he has food, but imagine babysitting your best friend and the love of your best friend’s life who may or may not actually like him back while they’re both on drugs and flirting with each other. And you have no escape and the car that brought you isn’t yours. That’s Gonta’s situation right now.

Shuuichi looks up at him with a wobbly smile. The car keys jingle slightly in his pocket. Kokichi’s a bit riled up and he’s breathing a bit heavy. Both of their desires to have full public decency are out the window, though not completely. There’s no one else around, even the workers are just at the drive thru and not paying attention to the back of the place.

“Ouma-kun, wanna come with me to the bathroom∼? We can kiss again in there without having to worry about anyone watching.” Shuuichi grabs Kokichi’s hand and holds it to his cheek with a smile. “You can say no though, of course.”

Kokichi shrugs a bit. “Why not. Life is filled with decisions I make and whether they’re good or bad is a gamble.”

Gonta groans, slapping his own forehead. “OH. My god. That is so disgusting.”

“I could call up Shinguuji-kun and ask if he wants to have sex with you in a McDonald’s bathroom too, Gonta!”

“AT THE SAME TIME AS YOU???”

Kokichi immediately responds to Gonta’s statement. “Not in this one. You can go to another McDonalds.”

“Oh my god please don’t just leave me here.” Gonta finishes one of his drinks, slamming it down on the table and denting the cup. “I’m seriously going to riot in the streets if you just leave me here.”

“This isn’t even the weirdest place I’ve had sex and that’s kinda sad.” Shuuichi reaches down and grabs Kokichi’s hand. He stands up, letting Kokichi follow along with him. He gives Gonta a wave and smile that would look innocent were it not for the already existing context. “Bye-Bye Gonta!! Be back in thirty!”

Despite Gonta’s protests the two head to the bathroom. Kokichi clings to Shuuichi, though he separates to lock the door behind them. With food in them and time passed they’re less fucked up than before. Shuuichi leans against the wall and Kokichi presses against him, effectively pinning the taller man.

“Can we kiss again… Ouma-kun?”

Kokichi nods. He reaches for the zipper of Shuuichi’s jacket but has a hard time actually pulling it down. Shuuichi laughs a bit, pulling it down himself. He’s not wearing any shirt underneath, seemingly having just tossed on the jacket to leave the house. Kokichi stares at him, chest pressed against Shuuichi’s own. He tilts his head up and leans in for another kiss.

Shuuichi reaches down to unbutton Kokichi’s gakuran and dress shirt. Kokichi’s too out of it to care about much at all, he’s too busy thinking about Shuuichi. Shuuichi pulls away from their kiss first so he can focus on Kokichi’s jacket. Shuuichi’s hands trail up his sides, one laying to rest on Kokichi’s hip while the other moves up the front of Kokichi’s chest.

“...Oh! You’re- you’re-” Shuuichi places the flat of his hand against Kokichi’s filthy, shitty binder.

“Don’t talk about it.” Kokichi practically growls. He moves Shuuichi’s hand off of his chest, though he doesn’t make any move to rebutton his jacket. “Mention it and you’re like.. dead or something.” Instead of having Shuuichi’s hand on his chest, he moves Shuuichi’s hand to his hip.

Kokichi decides to make the first move. He hooks a finger in the band of Shuuichi’s sweatpants and places his other hand on Shuuichi’s thigh, slowly moving up towards his crotch.

“...” Shuuichi swallows the spit in his mouth and wipes a bead of sweat off his forehead. “We shouldn’t be doing this. I shouldn’t be doing this to you.”

Kokichi pauses, and removes his hands. “Yeah. This place is disgusting. I feel like a roach is gonna crawl up my pants if I stay any longer.”

“Y-you’re just going to stop like that? And. Care about what I said?” Shuuichi’s a bit baffled. He blinks a few tears away from his eyes, but one still falls. “Even if it’s my fault that I dragged you here and did this while we’re both fucked up and-“

“Yeah. I don’t want to do this in a place this gross,” Kokichi slurs and starts trying to rebutton his jacket. He speaks in a low mumble, not meeting Shuuichi’s eyes. “I don’t care about that last part though, you can do that whenever. I’ve hooked up with people like this before a bunch.”

“... Oh.” Shuuichi now thinks that there’s no feeling to this, and it makes him feel even worse. He zips his jacket back up and decides to crack a joke. “Haha… I’ll have to change my boxers when I get home. Guess I really liked kissing you. The lipstick on your face is so cute though…”

Kokichi looks at Shuuichi’s smudged lips and rushes to the mirror, putting soap on his hand and trying to rub it off. “I look so ridiculous, oh my god. I wouldn’t wanna be in public with your lipstick all over my face. Someone’s gonna think somethin’s up. I don’t really wanna be hatecrimed tonight.”

“Haha, that’s understandable.” Shuuichi brushes some of his hair behind his ear, though it falls back into place. “Let’s head back out. You can stay at my house tonight if you want, too.”

“That sounds nice.” Kokichi smiles gently up at him.

When the two exit the bathroom, Gonta is staring right at them with a container of fries crushed between his fist. “YOU TWO. You are dead to me!!”


	18. Feeling Hands

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It's time for Kokichi lore. This isn't a fun chapter. Really, really heed the Trigger Warnings. I'm not even going back and editing this because I'm not a big fan of it but hey it's a new chapter. Kokichi has a flashback in the shower and has to run from his Dad, giving in and asking for Shuuichi to help him. They have a fun time making a pillow fort after the bad stuff.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TWs: Panic attacks, Implied past Sexual Abuse, Parental Abuse (Physical and Emotional), Self Harm, Alcohol, Minor Transphobia

Kokichi sets a bag on the counter, giving a quick greeting to his Dad. He had taken a small grocery store run for some snacks and hygiene supplies, and decided to go ahead and grab a coke for his Dad as a sort of ‘please be cool today’ thing. Kokichi sets the bottle onto the counter and brings the rest of the bag back to his room.

It’s a lazy day. Kokichi eats his first snack (meal) of the day in his bed, sipping on an energy drink so that he hopefully doesn’t fall back asleep in the middle of the day. He runs a hand through his hair and cringes at the grease. Ugh, did he really go outside with greasy, ugly hair? He sighs, groaning as he gets out of bed and sneaks over to the bathroom to shower. Maybe with enough luck the hot water will run for more than 10 minutes.

A new unopened 2 in 1 sits at the tub part of the shower. Kokichi had just grabbed the cheapest one, not caring about how it actually cleans. He’d be more inclined to pick out something actually healthy for his skin and hair if there wasn’t always someone else in the aisle with him, and Kokichi doesn’t want to look like a girl grabbing some fruity shampoo and skincare products. He turns on the shower and waits for the water to heat up.

Kokichi stares at himself in the dirty mirror as he makes his way over to the door to lock it. Too many times has his Dad walked in, screaming, grabbing him and dragging him out to be scolded for something that’s definitely Kokichi’s fault but not something worth a fight over. Kokichi swallows a lump in his throat just thinking about it and almost shrinks in on himself. No, thinking about that in the shower is Not a good thing. He locks the door.

The shower is an okay temperature. He’s past taking very hot or cold showers and forcing his body to adjust to them. Kokichi stands under the running water closing his eyes and locking his fingers behind his head. He showers with the lights off now, using his phone flashlight and a bottle of water that's way too old to illuminate the room like a night light. It helps.

Kokichi uncaps the new bottle, pouring it on his hand and lathering it into his hair. He starts to feel uneasy. Something in his stomach twists. Kokichi reaches forward to the bottle, wondering if it just smelled weird, and sniffs. He doesn’t expect much to come of it.

He drops the bottle. There are hands on him. Hands on his neck. Hands on his hips. On his stomach and thighs and he backs up so quickly towards the wall that he slips and falls. One of Kokichi’s hands travels to his own neck, just trailing his fingers along his windpipe. He thinks that he screamed but by the time he’s kneeling on the floor and scrubbing hard at his hair, Kokichi’s gone silent and just shakes.

What an odd thing to remember him by. Kokichi pulls and tugs at his hair and when his throat tightens he claws and claws at the skin on his back and neck until the blood droplets get washed away by the running water.

It’s like that until the water runs cold. Small bundles of fallen out hair are tangled in Kokichi’s hands as he rests his head on the bathtub floor and continues to try and calm himself down. He only has himself, no one else. At least, that's the only thing on his mind now. Kokichi's mind spirals down and down and he digs himself further and further into this hole he digs for himself.

“FUCK that’s cold!” Kokichi shrieks and is brought out of his spiral for at least a second. He reaches up to the handle and quickly turns the shower off. He leans over the edge of the tub and dry heaves, knowing that he doesn’t have the capacity to actually throw up. Kokichi whimpers, closing his eyes tight as the pain of his scratching sets in.

A few minutes are spent just kneeling over the side of the tub, aching and not wanting to get up. He slowly but surely stumbles his way up, shivering and knocking down the shower curtain rod in his frenzy to cover his body. He grabs multiple towels and wraps them around himself, only relaxing just a bit more as he drops to the floor. He stares blankly at the wall, wanting to just wait until he’s fully dry and calm to put his clothes back on.

Out of the house. It’s time to leave the house. The shower curtain falling made a loud crashing noise, and the footsteps Kokichi hears don’t sound good.

“Hey, what was that noise?” His Dad knocks loudly on the door, then fiddles with the door handle. Thank god Kokichi locked it. “Why is the door locked. You aren’t supposed to lock the door, K. Unlock it. Now.”

“Jesus Christ..." He mumbles to himself. "I just fell and grabbed the curtain to try and catch myself. I’ll put the rod back up when I’m dressed. That’s all that the noise was.” He stutters over his words, barely speaking loud enough to be heard past the door. Kokichi has to stay calm and pacify his Dad’s anger or else he could risk getting in a fight.

“Talk with me once you’re out.”

Kokichi gulps, not saying anything until he hears his Dad’s loud footsteps walk away from the door. Tears stream down his face but he makes no sound. He just huddles on the floor and tries not to make any noise. Eventually he knows that he has to get out and talk to his dad. He shakily grabs his clothes, pulling them on once he’s completely dry. It takes a few minutes for him to fix the shower curtain and put the fallen bottles back.

He stares at himself in the mirror again once he’s up on his feet. Kokichi’s self absorbed in that way. No mirror or reflective surface he passes will be ignored. His eyes are red and puffy and he doesn't even bother focusing on his neck and shoulders after seeing the wreck of his face The small amount of blood drawn had been washed away by the water, though bits of skin and blood remain under his nails. He grimaces at how ugly everything is, and tries to think of how he can hide it from his Dad.

A scarf. That should work. He still has a purple one that he knitted years ago. The matching one he made his father lays at the bottom of a storage box. Kokichi silently opens the bathroom door and rushes to his bedroom to put a scarf on. He packs his bag and puts some shoes on so that it 100% looks like he has to leave if he gets caught in a conversation. He grabs one of the bottles filled with stolen liquor in his room and drinks as much as he can without gagging, hiding the now empty bottle back under his bed. If Kokichi has to deal with his Dad he might as well be drunk.

He peers out into the living room, spotting his Dad playing a game on the computer. The monitor is partially broken, which was Kokichi’s fault for chucking the mouse at it in anger when something wasn’t loading right. Kokichi gulps nervously. He doesn’t know if he can sneak past him. Maybe his bedroom window would be the better option. There’s a reason he took the screen out. 

“Did you fix the shower curtain?” Seems like his Dad noticed him. The man pauses his game and stands up.

“Yeah. I did.”

“What is the correct way to say that, K?” His Dad expects a more respectful response than that.

Kokichi bites his tongue and spits out, “Yes sir.” His voice wavers with disrespect.

His Dad sighs at him and approaches. He reaches towards Kokichi’s face, grabbing it with one hand. Not to try and hurt him, but to force Kokichi to look at him. “You treat me with respect and I’ll treat you with it back. Are we clear?” The smell of alcohol on his breath is disgusting. Kokichi’s just glad it would cover up the smell of his own breath.

“Let me go. I said your stupid ‘yes sir’ now let me go. I was just about to leave the house. They called me into work today.” He’s lying. Kokichi’s never called in on weekends. He always lies to the man when he’s desperate to get away. 

“You aren’t wearing your work clothes. Don’t lie to me, K.” A tighter grip. “You’re going to show some proper respect. I didn’t raise a spoiled brat but you’re always acting like one. I just want you to be happy but you’re so caught up in your own world.”

Kokichi snarls, heart racing. He jerks his head to the side and bites one of the fingers holding his face. He pushes his Dad, but it doesn’t do much. Kokichi's started yet another fight he can't win. “Shut up! I’m leaving for tonight and don’t follow me!”

His scarf is grabbed when he tries to run. Kokichi gags and reels backwards, careening towards the floor. He’s pinned there, grip on his arms hard enough to bruise. The neighbors are used to their screaming matches by now.

_”pleas pick me ip saihara”_

The text is a shot in the dark. Kokichi stumbles out of the apartment complex, hugging himself as the sky and everything around him spins. His backpack with a few changes of clothes and snacks and his wallet had been knocked aside, forgotten. Kokichi was sure he was going to spend the next hour there on the floor until he was able to hit his Dad in the nose and stun him, allowing his escape. The scarf he ripped off his neck and tossed towards a garbage can. The jacket he was wearing to help cover his chest had been ripped off when his Dad tried to stop him from leaving. He has no money, no changes of clothes, no food. Only his phone and his wits. Kokichi sniffles, hoping that no one will see his snot and tear covered face. He idly scratches at his neck and tries to walk in a straight line until he hears his phone go off.

_”Where are you???"_

_"Is something wrong???"_

_"Did something happen are you okay??”_

Kokichi collapses near the entrance of the area his complex is in. He sends a picture of the sign to Shuuichi and closes his eyes, now quietly sobbing behind a bush. A few minutes pass, and he’s received multiple calls from his Dad that he declined. The shitty trash filled car he drives passes by him, but thankfully Kokichi’s not noticed. He claws at his hair and curls into a ball, the noises of the world drowned out from his crying.

Rain pours down, but Kokichi finds himself unable to care. That’s two things making him shiver violently. He lets the raindrops drip down his wet hair without any complaints. His face is buried in his arms and he hugs his knees to his chest. He thinks for a second about how he would probably feel at least a bit better if he wasn't soaking wet and the humor of that random thought almost snaps him out of his spiral.

“O-Ouma-kun! Ouma-kun, where-!” Shuuichi calls out for him, car parked right in front of the sign. He doesn’t search too long, finding Kokichi curled up beside the bush. “I’m here Ouma-kun, I’m here.”

Shuuichi takes off his jacket and wraps it around Kokichi’s shoulders. The rain causes Kokichi’s shirt to cling to his skin with no protection from the cold. He instantly feels the warmth radiating off of his friend. Shuuichi kneels down, wrapping his arms around the other man. “I’ll bring you to my car.”

He gently lifts Kokichi up, letting Kokichi cling to his shirt. Shuuichi hears him sob and he brings Kokichi to the back seat. Kokichi’s nails dig slightly through his shirt while he shakes in Shuuichi’s arms. Shuuichi rubs his back, murmuring sweet nothings to calm him down.

Kokichi cries and cries. Minutes pass and he finally starts to slow down and take some breaths. He pulls his face away from the crook of Shuuichi’s shoulder and sniffles, wiping his face on his arm. “... Sorry.”

“Ouma-kun… are you okay? What happened? Um, if you don’t mind me asking.”

The look of worry on Shuuichi’s face puts a pit in Kokichi’s stomach.

“I’m drunk,” He slurs, wanting to fall over at this point. Kokichi grabs onto the front of Shuuichi’s shirt, tears threatening to spill again. “My Dad- I…”

Kokichi breaks down more, spilling everything to Shuuichi. Everyone that’s hurt him ever. The future divorce of his parents. The years of his Dad screaming at and threatening and hitting him. Everything. His voice trembles and Kokichi’s not even sure that Shuuichi can hear what he’s saying. It’s like a therapy session where you give a basic summary of ‘this is what fucked me up enough to need therapy by the way, can I get a Complex PTSD diagnosis?’ but with a lot more crying and mumbling.

Shuuichi’s already told Kokichi most of his life story. The man has no filter and will spill about 80% of his trauma to anyone who listens, and then feel bad and get paranoid about it. He knows almost nothing about Kokichi other than the rumors he’s heard and the things he’s already seen. He himself starts crying a bit, pulling Kokichi close to him and holding him tight.

“Oh my god. I shouldnt’ve said anything. Shit, I’m not supposed to tell anyone anything I’m so so sorry Saihara. I-”

“You were bottling all that up the whole time? Ouma-kun, that’s not good… That’s a lot. That’s really bad.” He gently squeezes Kokichi and rubs comforting circles into the smaller man’s back. Currently Shuuichi’s thoughts are mostly occupied with ‘Kill his Dad Kill his Dad Kill his Dad Kill his Dad’, but he tries his hardest to shove the thought away for fear that it would make everything worse.

Kokichi gulps in a ragged breath. “I had to leave today or he was gonna kill me. Or something, I don’t know. He said I wouldn’t live if I stayed in his way. Mom won’t do anything because she’s still trying to get the divorce to be legal. She doesn’t want me around because-” His voice breaks. “-Because I’m just like him.”

“No. Don’t fucking say that.” Shuuichi speaks in a way Kokichi’s never heard him speak before. It makes Kokichi instantly begin sobbing again, caving in on himself and gripping Shuuichi’s shirt even tighter. Shuuichi immediately apologizes over and over again, reaching up and gently stroking Kokichi’s hair. “I meant- I meant you shouldn’t say things like that. You’re not a monster, Ouma-kun. You’re kind and sweet and you’re really nice to be around, and you may have a hard exterior because of all your trauma but the person you’re hiding is really good even if you don’t notice it!”

Hearing an actual compliment on his godawful personality hurts. Kokichi doesn’t know how to respond. He wants to insult himself over and over again, maybe start beating this shit out of any part of himself he can, hard enough to have dull yellow splotches appear in the next days. There's already scratches, who cares if he messes up his clean streak more.

Speaking of which, Shuuichi’s looking at those right now. “Ouma-kun, what happened-?”

“Don’t. I did that.”

Shuuichi nods, knowing now not to breach the subject. “Let’s go back to my house. You can stay as long as you need.”

“My Dad’ll probably let me stay as long as I want. Um, I’ll need to pick up some things if I’m staying for more than a day or two though. If I do.. would you be able to help me grab them though my bedroom window? Sorry, I don’t want to make you have to do that, but-”

Shuuichi smiles sweetly down at him. “Of course. If you give me a list I’ll go do it now.”

“Y-you will? Thank you… oh my god thank you. Um, I’ll text it to you. I just need my school stuff and some boxers and a change of clothes, and-” Kokichi swallows the spit in his mouth. Sure, Shuuichi was trans too, and Shuuichi already regrettably knew he was too after their little drugged up makeout sesh in a McDonald’s bathroom, but he doesn’t like saying it. “-and my binder.”

“Aha… well I don’t think I’ll need to grab it. You see, well, when we were-” Shuuichi’s breath catches in his throat at the memory. “Mmmaking out, I saw how bad yours was and ordered you a new one that’s made to be safe. It took a bit to get here and I had to take your measurements when you were asleep at my house, but I’ve been waiting to give it to you!”

Kokichi can’t even bring himself to be weirded out by Shuuichi taking his measurements. Nor can he bring himself to cry anymore, he’s all wiped out. But damn if he wouldn’t have started crying again. “Holy shit, that’s. That’s really nice of you. You didn’t have to, really.”

“It’s a gift, Ouma-kun! I didn’t want you having to wear that ratty, crappy one anymore. This one’s a lot better. I got it in black since you mostly wear black, and it’ll pass as an undershirt better.” Seems Shuuichi really thought about Kokichi’s habits when ordering it. “I’ll stop talking about it now since I know it makes you uncomfortable. Here, I’ll go grab your stuff for you. Stay here, I’ll still leave the car running!”

Shuuichi leaves, grabbing an umbrella from the floor of the car. Kokichi texts him what he needs and where everything is, hoping that his instructions aren’t confusing. He sits and waits for Shuuichi to get back, looking out the car window at the rain. Kokichi’s starting to get cold with the AC on, and decides to take his shirt off and just wear Shuuichi’s jacket. That’s better. He takes his soaked pants and briefs off as well and pulls his knees up into the hoodie to hide himself. Shuuichi’s going to be bringing him a change of clothes anyway. He leans back and relaxes a bit finally.

The car door opens, and Shuuichi sets Kokichi’s backpack and a large pile of slightly wet clothes down next to him. He shakes the umbrella off and closes it, tossing it on the floor. “I didn’t know what clothes to grab so I grabbed as many as I could fit in my arms. Here, you can stay here in the back seat, I’ll drive us to my house.”

“.. Thank you Saihara.” A sad smile is all that Kokichi has to offer for him.

Shuuichi reaches forward, gently caressing Kokichi’s cheek. “It’s the least I could do, Ouma-kun.” He heads up to the front seat, driving forward. “What music do you wanna put on?”

“Any is fine.”

Music starts playing. Normally the two would be belting singing in the front seats with it blasting, laughing and trying to hold a conversation over the music. Shuuichi talks the most, ranting to Kokichi about anything involving Danganronpa or other various ‘fandoms’ (whatever that means). But the ride to Shuuichi’s house is quiet aside from the music and occasional sob.

The back car door is opened and Shuuichi offers his arms to Kokichi. They’re accepted with little hesitation, Kokichi once again burying his face in Shuuichi’s shirt. He looks up for a second, staring into Shuuichi’s eyes with most of his face hidden. “.. You have really pretty eyes.”

Shuuichi’s face turns a bright red. He gulps and sputters a bit. “Um-! I- I do? Do you- do you really think that?”

Kokichi slowly reaches up with one of his hands, gently touching Shuuichi’s cheek. “Yeah.”

The only thing Shuuichi can think to do is look away and close his eyes and deny it. “They’re not really, um, I mean, they’re just not really that interesting, I have just kind of normal eyes I guess? And, um, well, they’re on my face and my face is ugly and gross and-!”

“Well, I like them.” Kokichi is able to shut him up with just those words.

Shuuichi hooks his arms under Kokichi’s legs, lifting him up and carrying him to the house. He has to set Kokichi down on the floor for a little bit to check the locks on all the doors. He leaves some music on and sets Kokichi down on his bed. Shuuichi assures him that he’ll be right back, and a few minutes later comes back with a bottle of water, some heated up leftovers that he knows Kokichi likes, and a pot of tea and a cup- all on a tray.

“Here you go, is there anything else I can do or bring you?” Shuuichi asks, watching Kokichi crawl out from under the covers to slowly eat and drink.

“.. Can we make a pillow fort?”

Shuuichi looks at the bed and laughs a bit awkwardly. “I don’t really know how to make one…”

“I’ll teach you then.” Kokichi says with a smile that makes Shuuichi’s heart beat even faster.

Thankfully Shuuichi already had a few hooks in his ceiling from old stuff he used to hang up, and they just attach string to those and wrap it around a few times to make it sturdy before pulling a sheet over them. Shuuichi even moves his string lights to be strung up inside of the fort. Kokichi instructs him the whole way through. When they’re done, Kokichi takes a step back to observe it and gives Shuuichi a thumbs up.

Kokichi’s able to pick what they’ll watch together, choosing some sort of old super hero comic book movie. No one really watches or makes those anymore these days, but Kokichi grew up on them and they’re something mindless to pay attention to. He lies down in the little nest they made, finishing what Shuuichi brought him.

He’s sure that when he comes to, he’ll feel embarrassed and awful for having another person help him. But for now, Kokichi smiles and enjoys being right by Shuuichi’s side. He leans to the side, and rests his head on Shuuichi’s shoulder.


	19. Robotics

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kokichi runs into Miu while searching for a place to actually be productive when making up his missed schoolwork. While they argue Kokichi spots a new person, Kiibo Idabashi, spying on the two of them. When he approaches Kiibo, he finds out that this guy is a part of Team Danganronpa and unfortunately becomes a subject to relatively tame but still frustrating experimentation.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> No TWs

Kokichi really thought that he was smart enough to take Physics his senior year. He is, and he understands the material for the most part, but there’s so much work in the class that he’s falling behind on the material currently being taught. There’s after school tutoring one day of the week, but there’s humiliation in that that Kokichi doesn’t want to deal with. He’s already being tutored in a few of his other classes, but Korekiyo can’t help him with science related subjects. At least Korekiyo is a prick in a way that Kokichi can deal with because it’s kind of fun to just back and forth shallowly insult each other, other tutors are less tolerable with their pity and ‘I’m so much better than you’ attitude.

He peers through the window of each of the labs, resting his hand on the window. Maybe sitting in one of the rooms alone will help him focus easier. His desk at home is currently covered in art crap and dust (an organized mess, as Kokichi calls it) so normally he elects to just do homework on his bed or floor. The floor leads to back pain, and the bed usually leads to him giving up and going on his phone after 15 minutes of work. Kokichi passes by the robotics lab, and spots a piece of paper on the wall.

_”DO NOT LET IN: Miu Iruma, third year.”_

Yeah, that makes sense. From his one interaction with her, he knows that she’s reprehensible.

“Get outta the way!! I’m three seconds away from running you over!!”

Kokichi whips around right as someone runs into him. A bag spills metal parts on him. Kokichi swears when a large battery hits him right in the forehead, and the two of them topple over. The cracked door to the robotics lab gives way, and they land in the room.

“Watch it!” Kokichi snaps, bringing a hand to his stinging forehead. He automatically kicks the person in the ribs, scrambling his way back. Great, just what he needed today.

Miu herself is the one who ran into him. She groans, annoyed as hell. “Y-you little brat..! You can’t kick me in the ribs, and you can’t be getting in my way! Ngggghhh…. Great. Now someone knows I’m here! You… won’t tell anyone I’m here…. right?”

Kokichi’s lip curls when he recognizes the girl. Every time she speaks it’s like an emotional rollercoaster, like she can’t decide if she wants to be her normal submissive or badly antagonistic. “Let’s see…. You run into me at a robotics lab you aren’t allowed in. After you insult me at a party. And you’re asking me for a favor?”

“I’m only here cuz I got no place else to work on stuff! An aspiring engineer needs the space to work, and… well… my parents don’t think that girls can be engineers.” Miu starts picking up all her spilled stuff, trying to reorganize everything.

“Don’t tell me your backstory.”

“And I don’t have anywhere else I can practice! They got all the materials I don’t have here, and they’ve got guides on things I can build! I’m still a beginner but I’ll learn in no time!” Miu’s voice wavers on the last sentence. “But…”

Kokichi picks the earwax out of his ear and flicks it to the ground, only half paying attention to Miu. When she trails off, he looks up, bored. “.. What now.”

Miu points at him and closes the door with her foot. “You know I’m here. So, uh, naturally, that means I can’t let you leave, right? Ngh… what would Akamatsu-chan say…” She bites her thumb and thinks for a second. “Oh I know, she would threaten you with a knife!”

“You wouldn’t,” He responds, a lilt of a question and fear in his words. Could she? Kokichi doesn’t see a knife on her, but there’s plenty of other tools. There’s not much he knows about Miu other than her friendship with Kaede, which puts her on his hate-list.

“..... Watch me!” Miu fumbles around her supplies, and Kokichi has half a mind to kick her right in the face.

He rolls his eyes and stands up, wiping some dirt off his ass and readjusting the backpack on his shoulders. Kokichi really doesn’t want to have to risk touching another human being today, so he doesn’t exactly want to force his way past Miu unless he really has to.

After what felt like a whole few minutes of watching her search through her supplies while blocking the door, Miu pulls out a capped exacto knife. “I won’t let you- Crap.” She pulls the cap off and points it back at Kokichi. “I won’t let you leave!”

Kokichi stares down at her, blinks twice, and nonchalantly kicks the tool out of her hand. “You have no confidence. Now get out of the doorway so I can leave.” He doesn’t plan on telling any teachers or anyone that Miu’s breaking the rules, but she doesn’t need to know that. You know, Kokichi can’t say he doesn’t like the power he’s holding right now. It’s a real confidence booster.

“What!? How could you just kick that out of my hand!” Miu retracts her hand, shaking it in a bit of pain. “You’re supposed to cower and cry! Akamatsu-chan said you cried when she cut you, didn’t you? Said you barely put up a fight!”

From Miu’s spot on the floor, the shadow of Kokichi’s bangs only makes his glare more prominent. His lip curls into a sneer as their dull eyes make contact with one another. “She was lying, idiot. Now get out of my way.”

Miu’s lip trembles and she bows her head, kneeling in front of Kokichi but not moving out of the way. Her hands travel up his pant leg and tug lightly at it. “... Wait. Please. Please, don’t- don’t tell anyone I was here. I’ll… I’ll b-b-beg you i-if I have to.”

Kokichi puts a hand over his mouth, nose scrunching and expression disgusted. This is so ugly and humiliating. He looks up and around the room, seeing if there’s any other escape. When he spares a glance to the small window on the door, he spots someone he’s never seen before staring directly at him. The person disappears as soon as they make eye contact, and Kokichi looks back down at Miu so he can leave as soon as possible.

“Fine, fine! You don’t need to beg!” Kokichi gags a bit just saying that. “I wasn’t planning on telling anyone anyway. I don’t think I’m supposed to be here either so it’s not like I was gonna risk it.”

Miu snivels and slowly gathers her things off of the floor into her arms. Kokichi groans in annoyance, finally just stepping over her and opening up the door, not caring that it hits her in the side. He ignores her squawk and walks out, trying to find the boy who had been looking in on them. A sound of footsteps is coming from the right, and Kokichi decides to follow it.

A short boy with a hat and gakuran similar to Kokichi’s own is walking down the hallway, peering into each classroom and writing things down in a little notebook. There’s something off about him. Kokichi thinks he’s wearing a wig, the shine of the light is too unnatural for it to be real unless this guy just doesn’t shower at all. Kokichi approaches, making sure that there’s distance between the two.

“Why were you looking through the door at me,” Kokichi asks, his new sense of confidence making it easy for him to speak firmly. It’ll fade within five minutes, but he’s going to milk it as much as possible.

The boy turns around to face Kokichi, and he swears he can hear something whirring. The boy’s hat and hair cover both of his eyes, and his skin looks unnatural. It looks too perfect. Kokichi usually spots acne or scars or large pores or eyebags right away on people, but this guy doesn't have anything like that.

“You are asking me a question. I will do my best to answer you.” He bows respectfully to Kokichi. Okay, there’s something even more weird now. His voice is mechanical- he sounds almost like a vocaloid. Something whirrs, and he starts speaking again as if from a script. “I am model K 1 - B 0. My name is Kiibo Idabashi. I am a product of Team Danganronpa’s robotics lab. I am in this highschool on orders from a higher ranking member.”

“... Um.”

“As for your question, I am observing.” Kiibo turns back to look through the nearest window again, and writes a few things down. “I don’t want to be disturbed, as it makes me feel anxiety. The feeling is in my stomach. Would you be able to leave me be until I am done with this room?”

Kokichi’s mind is reeling. What the hell? Robots aren’t a new scientific discovery or anything, but this guy really seems like a robot. And that’s something Kokichi’s never seen before. He squints, trying to gather more information without asking, but all parts of Kiibo’s skin are covered aside from his neck and face.

“Could you please stop watching me? Turn your head and look away, or go into the hallway over there. I will be with you momentarily.”

“Yeah, okay.” Kokichi rolls his eyes and walks into the classroom next door. He might as well go and start on his missed work. Google should give him all the answers he needs for that, and maybe on who this guy is. He looks up “K1-B0 Team Danganronpa” and gets a few news articles on a boy who had been given artificial life by Team Danganronpa after a near-fatal building explosion. Yeah, that makes sense and satiates Kokichi’s curiosity. He sits down in the back corner of the classroom and starts on his work, getting a few questions in.

It’s all fine until he hears someone else enter the room. The door opens, closes, and then the lock turns. “Hello? Are you the friendly student from before?”

Kokichi looks up, finding Kiibo in the room. He sets his pencil down and gives him a rude looking side-eye. “You already answered your question for me, I’m just trying to do my homework now so go.”

“... That makes me feel frustrated and unwanted.” Kiibo continues approaching. Once in view of Kokichi’s papers he tilts his head and reads all of them. “You’re wrong on Question 5. The answer is-”

“What do you want.”

Kiibo tilts his head back up straight. “I did not like that you interrupted me when I was trying to help. That makes me feel sad, but I will try to understand that you have emotions too.” He clears his throat, though it sounds more like a slightly over the top gesture than him actually needing to clear his throat. “I wish to become friends with the students here when I can. You are the first person I have spoken with today, but that is because I arrived after the day had ended so it would be less overwhelming. Please, tell me your name and we can start a friendship!”

Kokichi watches Kiibo bow to him once more. This is way too weird. “Um. Kokichi Ouma.”

“I will call you Ouma-kun to be respectful.” Kiibo’s mouth hangs open in thought, causing an awkward silence to follow. “.. My apologies, leaving a hanging pause in the conversation was wrong of me. It makes me feel awkward. I will answer any questions that my new friend Ouma-kun has, unless it is classified information.”

Kokichi thinks about it for a second. Is Team Danganronpa really getting something involved in this school? Why this dump of all places? “Who ordered you to be at this school and why?”

“Er… that is classified information. Try another question?” Kiibo awkwardly taps his fingers together.

“Do you have any cool robot functions?” It’s a good question to ask. Kokichi thinks it would be sick as fuck if he had something like a lightsaber or rocketboots or something.

Kiibo’s fingers cross in front of his chest to form an X. “As I was originally human, my father wished my form to be as human as possible. I do not have any functions other than that of a synthetic human. It makes me feel happy that you are so interested in my functions though. I have actually put in a request form for a mecha suit, like the ones from Evangelion, but that was denied. Do you have any more questions?”

Does he? Kokichi taps his foot in thought, but he really doesn’t have anything else he wants to ask. It would feel rude to say anything about the building explosion- you don’t just ask someone how they lost parts of their bodies or whatever. Hopefully Kiibo will leave now so that Kokichi can go back to his work. “Nope.”

“Okay, it is my turn for questions.”

Wait, this guy wants to ask stuff too?

“What is your height, weight, sex, and race?” Kiibo asks.

“What. I’m not answering those.” Kokichi starts slowly putting his stuff together, eyeing the exit and the windows nearby. The door is locked from the inside. Kiibo doesn’t seem to realize that that does nothing.

“You misunderstand.” Kiibo takes a step closer to Kokichi. “These are not optional.”

Kokichi shoves his stuff in his bag, hauling it over his shoulder. His chair is kicked over in the process of standing up, but he’s still backed into the corner of the room. “The hell do you want.”

“I need your height, weight, sex, and race for my experimentation, Ouma-kun.” The monotony of his voice only makes it sound worse. He steps even closer to Kokichi, a mere few inches from him. Kiibo’s hands move to Kokichi’s wrists, near impossible to break the grip of. “Now answer my questions.”

“If I answer them will you let me go!?” Kokichi tries to move back and wrench his hands out of Kiibo’s grasp to no avail.

“If you answer all my questions you can leave for today.”

Kokichi gulps. His voice wavers, just barely. “5 foot 1 and a half. 100... something pounds. Male. Japanese. Now let me go.”

Kiibo let’s go with both of his hands and grabs his notebook, writing fast while still staring at Kokichi. “I said you could leave for today once you answered all my questions.” He puts his notebook back into his pocket, knowing that Kokichi can’t leave unless he wants to try and squeeze past Kiibo. Kiibo reaches for Kokichi’s hand lightly, pulling it up in front of him and rolling the sleeve back. He places a finger on Kokichi’s pulse.

“Answer this scenario for me. The one you love is dying slowly and painfully, bleeding out from a wound never able to heal. There is a kill switch in your hands- if you press the button they will instantly die without more pain. They are begging you not to press the button. What do you do? You cannot lie to me without me knowing.” Does Kiibo think he can automatically tell by his pulse that Kokichi’s lying? Not too smart of him.

The words of ‘let me go’ rest at the tip of Kokichi’s tongue. Ugh, he’s just going to say the first thing that comes to mind that doesn’t make him sound like a freak. He doesn't want Kiibo to say ‘you and I aren’t so different’ or whatever. “... I stay with them for a bit to see if there’s anything I can do to help?”

“No matter what you choose they will die.”

Scenarios like this always got to Kokichi’s head and stuck with him, making him think too much about if it was real. But he shoves that thought away. “I don’t press the button.”

“The kill switch is for you now. If you press the button, you will take their place and they will live, but they will now bear the task of choosing your death, and you will die slowly. What do you do?”

“I press the button.”

Kiibo “determines” that Kokichi isn’t lying. “Um. What’s the next question… Oh. Do you tell them to do something? Or do you stay silent?”

A long pause. “Talk to me while I die and pretend like it’s not happening..?”

The notebook is pulled out again, and Kiibo writes a few things down. He takes a few steps back and gestures towards the door. “You may leave. I will see you later, Ouma-kun.”

It takes only a second for Kokichi to rush out the door, grabbing his sleeve and yanking it back down. When Kokichi spares a glance behind him, Kiibo is excitedly bouncing back and forth, shouting, “Yes! I did my first experimentation!”

He looks over his shoulder every few heart pounding seconds after that, making sure that he’s not being followed. Work for school can be finished somewhere else away from that fucking creep. What the hell was that? That sounded like questions on a personality quiz for like, some sort of edgy thing 13 year olds do.

Kokichi hopes that he never sees the robot ‘later’.


	20. Liars

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tsumugi texts Kokichi, wanting to meet up in the library with him. She's pissed off that he's been ditching her, but Kokichi doesn't take her guilt tripping and finally leaves. Kokichi reflects on how his friendship with Gonta and Shuuichi has grown and finds solace in it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TWs: Manipulation, Guilt tripping, Ableism towards Mental Illness, Threats of Violence

_”Would you like to go to the library with me for lunch my baby boy? It’ll be fun! (≧◡≦) ♡ It’s been too long since we’ve hung out... it’s like you found other friends… ｡ﾟ･ ( >﹏<) ･ﾟ｡ Love u!”_

Kokichi stares at his phone when the message pops up. He bumps against Shuuichi in the hallway and stumbles a bit, causing the other man to turn around with concern. Kokichi can’t bring his eyes off of his phone screen, just staring at the text blankly. He swallows the spit pooling in his mouth nervously, biting at dead skin on his lips while he tries to figure out just what to do.

Shuuichi looks at his phone without looking like he’s looking at his phone, but is unable to read Kokichi’s normal sized phone text. He places a hand on Kokichi’s shoulder in concern. “Hm? What is it Ouma-kun?”

“Shirogane’s asking if I can go to the library with her for lunch. It’s been a while since I’ve seen her so I think she’s kind of upset. I don’t want her starting any shitty rumors about me or anything. I’ll see you tomorrow though, Saihara.” He smiles a bit at Shuuichi and waves, doing a 180 and going in the direction of the library. Might as well get this over with.

“Oh.. um, have fun Ouma-kun.” Shuuichi turns away a bit too fast and pulls his hat further over his head.

Great, now Shuuichi’s sad he’s going. Kokichi can worry about that later though. Maybe it won’t even be a problem by the time this is done. He makes his way to the library, not caring about lunch passes or whatever the hell. If the librarian asks, he can just pull a sad face and say he thinks he threw it out with his lunch trash. Speaking of false lies, he tries to come up with as many responses for as many possible scenarios as possible. If she asks about the street party, if she asks about Shuuichi, if she asks why he doesn’t hang around her much anymore, whatever possible that comes to mind.

Tsumugi is sitting at the table in the nonfiction section, a book popped open while she eats a well prepared bento lunch. Kokichi sits down next to her, setting his bag down on the floor. She notices him immediately, smiling up at him. “Hello Ouma-kun!! So glad you got my message hehe.. Are you going to be eating anything for lunch?”

“Hm? Oh, no I wasn’t planning to. I had a big breakfast today.” The second part is a lie, but Tsumugi doesn’t need to know that. Kokichi doesn’t even think he could stomach food right now- he’s honestly pretty nervous about being near Tsumugi again. He doesn’t want her spreading anything about him to make a jab back for their failing friendship.

“Of course, you’re always skipping lunch. Chabashira-san and Hoshi-kun sometimes give you parts of their lunch, don’t they?” She shoves a small bite into her mouth, making Kokichi wait for the next part of what she’s saying. “As well as Gokuhara-kun and Saihara-kun, am I correct?”

Kokichi tries not to show a reaction. “Oh, are you friends with them too?”

“I’ve had a few conversations with Chabashira-san and Hoshi-kun, and you know my relationship with Saihara-kun.” Her words at the end are more bitter, and it makes Kokichi’s stomach drop. “Why have you been having lunch with Saihara-kun instead of me?”

Another lie is in order. “The library wigs me out at lunch since it’s so weirdly quiet and the librarian doesn’t like me, and I know you prefer to be in here. Usually I eat outside alone, but sometimes it’s with Gokuhara and Saihara because they invite me.”

“Of course.” Something about her words makes it seem like she doesn’t fully believe him. “I wouldn’t expect my little brother to abandon me. Or at least, again, since you didn’t come to the street party with me on Halloween.”

Kokichi grips his thigh hard, hoping to whatever entity out there that Tsumugi can’t sense his nervousness. He can just pin this on Shuuichi like he planned, and tell the other man about it later. Shuuichi will understand. “Um… Saihara insisted. I was neutral on the street party, but he really didn’t want to go and I didn’t want to leave him alone.”

“Where’s my cosplay then?”

“It’s at my house, sorry. I’ll bring it back tomorrow for you?” Kokichi offers. Another thing to bring up to Shuuichi- the cosplay is neatly folded up and in a plastic bag at Shuuichi’s house right now.

Tsumugi runs her hand through his hair, trailing her fingers down the back of his neck for a second, lingering, and trailing them back up. She moves even closer, pressing the side of her face against Kokichi’s own. One of her hands moves to Kokichi’s waist. It makes him want to gag and run. “Baby boy… is there something you aren’t telling me?”

It’s easy for Kokichi to think of something that won’t hurt to say. There’s a lot of things he’s not telling Tsumugi. “Actually, yeah, something weird happened to me the other day that I’m still weirded out by and it’s been making me real wiggy.”

“What is it?”

“Well, I was just hanging out here afterschool and I… was kind of psychologically experimented on by a half-robot disguised as someone who went to this school. He like, trapped me in a classroom and grabbed me and asked me some questions about what I would do if I had a button to instantly kill someone who was dying slowly, or something like that. It was really weird. He said his name was Kiibo Idabashi, or like Kay One Be Oh or something, and he’s from Team Danganronpa.”

Tsumugi seems to think for a few seconds. She taps her long nails against the table. “Yeah, that’s really weird. I recognize the name.. But not much else.”

“You worked with Team Danganronpa, right?” Of course Kokichi knows. Tsumugi helped with some of the designs in an internship/commission type dealie, and she brags about it constantly.

“Yes! I was commissioned for helping them with Season 52 designs and had an internship in their building. Though, I haven’t been contacted again to work with them this year.” She brags about it once more, of course. Tsumugi would never let anyone forget, it garnered quite a bit of jealousy from the other major Danganronpa fans at their school. It even got Tsumugi doxxed more than once, but she didn’t really care at a surface level. Kokichi remembers her pretending like she hadn’t just been crying, but she couldn’t hide the redness of her eyes. It made him feel bad for her at the time, but Kokichi tries not to let it make him feel pity now.

The last part is more important to Kokichi despite being a disappointment. If only Tsumugi was a part of Team Danganronpa again this year she could possibly have a clue about what the hell this Kiibo guy wants, but since she isn’t there’s no more leads. “Damn. I wish I knew what he wanted. He said he would ‘see me later’, so that’s fucked up.”

“Human experimentation isn’t uncommon within their ranks. Actually, it’s pretty uncommon for someone who works there to Not have an interest in it. Or at least, that’s what I observed.” Tsumugi taps her chin in thought. “It’s pretty plain to see that, though. Psychological, physical, sexual… all sorts of experimentation.”

Well, that doesn’t put his mind at ease in the slightest!

They sit in silence for a bit, Tsumugi eating her lunch and Kokichi looking around the library, reading all the titles of the books around him. He used to be a real bookworm- like the type of kid who read all of class and would hiss or hit you with their book if you approached them. But now, he hasn’t really read a full book in years.

Tsumugi takes a drink from her water bottle and grabs Kokichi’s hand. “Ouma-kun…. You know that Saihara-kun is an awful person, right?”

Kokichi doesn’t respond.

“He’s stolen my cosplays and my unique makeup and wig styling designs. He’s insulted me for liking yaoi and he’s even made fun of my cosplays before. On his private vent account he would talk about how violent his thoughts are and how sometimes he wants to kill people. His mental illnesses make him dangerous, I would just hate for you to be put into an unsafe situation because of him.” Her other cold hand is placed on Kokichi’s shoulder. She seems to be waiting for a response.

He shrugs Tsumugi’s hand off his shoulder and lets go of her. “Don’t touch me.”

“And now you won’t even let me touch you.” She’s irritated. Kokichi can’t help but see a bit of his mother in her. “I bet you let Saihara-kun touch you. Even when you’re being a bitch. But I’m less important than he is now, aren’t I.”

When Tsumugi reaches for him again, he shoots up from his chair, almost tripping over his backpack with how fast he steps back. He gulps, that awful pain of his body desperately trying to cry hitting him. He blinks a few times, not wanting to cry in front of Tsumugi. There’s a shakiness to his breath and he tries to apologize to stay on her good side. God, he really really doesn’t want to be outed again, he doesn’t know if Tsumugi would stoop that low, but it’s always possible. “I’m sorry, I-”

“You’re not sorry. If you were sorry you wouldn’t have done it in the first place. You’re never sorry. ‘Sorry’ is just a placeholder for you to placate others so they don’t _humilate_ you.” She doesn’t stand up or reach for him again or hell, she doesn’t even raise her bare hand to smack him. Kokichi almost wishes that she did. It would make it a lot easier if she would just hit him.

“Sorry, I just-”

“You’re a fucking monster.” She turns her back to him, cold and harsh. “Go. Just leave me.”

Kokichi knows she’s just guilt tripping him. She wants him to come back to her, teary-eyed and begging for support. He grits his teeth and grabs his bag, hauling it over his shoulder and leaving before Tsumugi can stop him. When he spares a glance back at her all he can see is pure disappointment. He wonders if that sadness in her eyes is real or not.

“Hey Saihara, I’m back,” he announces, sitting right next to Shuuichi. He pulls out his bag and brings out a plastic bag full of various sweets and treats for everyone. Kokichi wants to get his mind off of what just happened.

“Oh, uh, how’d it go?” Shuuichi asks. He raises his hand a bit, staring down at Kokichi’s own like he’s questioning it. A second passes and he gently slides his hand under Kokichi’s own, holding it in a way that makes Kokichi’s heart race so much better than earlier.

Kokichi stares at the ground, and laughs uncontrollably for a few seconds. He feels like Gonta and Shuuichi are looking at him like he’s crazy, but damn it Kokichi just can’t stop laughing. After some time he’s finally able to breathe out, “FUCK Shirogane. I never want to see her again.”

“Wooo! ‘Bout time my man!” Gonta elbows him playfully, laughing just a bit. “Saihara and I already separated your lunch stuff if you’re hungry and didn’t bring anything. Need me to take Shirogane off campus and beat her teeth in?”

“Honestly?” Kokichi takes a bite of his lunch, looking between Gonta and Shuuichi, and finally down at the lunch they gave him. It’s somewhat different every day, but it really is every day that they bring something for him.

When he’s able to, Kokichi will bring in a bunch of sweets everyone likes, it makes him feel like he’s actually contributing something. After his paychecks he likes to text the group chat that he’s the one bringing lunch, and he’ll go to the grocery store and cook something to bring in tupperware containers. Kokichi remembers a time that Shuuichi was rushing and wasn’t able to bring lunch even for himself; Shuuichi spent the first few minutes apologizing profusely to Kokichi for it despite Kokichi not really caring. Gonta ended up splitting his lunch three ways, even when Shuuichi and Kokichi said it was okay and that they didn’t need to eat. Ever since Kokichi’s been with them, he’s found himself spacing out less and less and he’s able to have the energy to do more things.

They’re so much better friends than Tsumugi ever was, huh. He realizes that now. Even if he had already somewhat realized it earlier, it just hits him. It hits him hard enough that he has to hold back crying yet again. Kokichi looks up at Gonta, and responds, “I don’t think I would mind that.”

Shuuichi squeezes Kokichi’s hand with a nervous smile. “I wish I could have gotten you away from her sooner… I don’t think she ever saw you as more than a toy.”

Kokichi’s heart drops. “.. What do you mean? I know she sucks, but I thought she like, actually liked me at least a little bit.”

Both Gonta and Shuuichi look at each other, and wince. Gonta motions to Shuuichi not to tell Kokichi anything, but it’s ignored. “Um… Not exactly. She used to always tell me how ‘pitiful’ and ‘weak’ you were, and she would always be really weird and sexual and insulting when talking about you despite how she would always refer to you as a brother. And she made such a big deal out of you drinking a lot as if it was her own issue and not yours. I think… originally she was waiting to make you super dependent on her so she could drop you and see how awful you felt just for fun. I didn’t even know she was talking about you until you told me your name and then I put the pieces together.”

In Kokichi’s silence, near brought to tears, Gonta speaks up and starts shouting. “Fuck that bitch! Ouma, if she ever comes near you or tries to mess with you again, I’m gonna rip her limb from limb! I’m serious! Actually, I think I’ll skip out on school right now to head there if one of you can tell me where she lives again. I’m so sick of the bullshit she put both of you through.”

That actually brings Kokichi away from crying in front of the two of them. He didn’t want to cry anyways. That would’ve been super embarrassing. He thinks about it for a second. “... Did I ever tell you guys about how we became friends?”

When Gonta and Shuuichi look at each other weirdly, Kokichi takes it as his opportunity to continue speaking. It’s pretty personal, but Kokichi thinks he trusts these two enough to let them know. “So, uh. Actually this should have been a major red flag but I was so… desperate for a friend I guess I just ignored it. But after she started talking some to me when we met in the library, she invited me to her place. And after a lot, and I mean A LOT of convincing I cosplayed some weird girl character with her. Then she told me I had to continue or she’d send the pictures to Akamatsu. I couldn’t, like, really say no or anything, so I agreed with her. Eventually she didn’t have to threaten to leak pictures just to get me to stay. I just did it.”

Gonta’s jaw drops. “What the FUCK man! Okay, I’ve made my decision of what to do to her.”

Shuuichi and Kokichi spend the next 15 minutes of lunch trying to convince Gonta not to blackmail Tsumugi and beat the shit out of her. Not because they don’t want to see her hurt, but because they don’t really want to see Gonta in handcuffs. When Kokichi looks over at Shuuichi, he realizes that the only reason that Shuuichi himself isn’t threatening violence is because he, too, is scared of Tsumugi and her connections. That’s probably why he never told Kokichi that stuff about her until now. It’s probably why Shuuichi would still cosplay and party with her despite knowing damn well he was unwelcome. She really did have both of them in her grip, but hopefully they can both be free from now on.


	21. Kichi

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kokichi and Shuuichi go to a little restaurant together! It's totally not a date, right?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TWs: Mentions of Alcohol, Weed, and Cocaine

Knock knock knock. Kokichi knocks and rings the doorbell to Shuuichi's house. They had already talked about meeting up today, and he had his Dad drop him off for the weekend. There's a smile on his face, and he bounces back and forth slightly. Kokichi really enjoys the time they spend together- it's one of things he really looks forward to in the week. He enjoys the occasional ride to and from school, so much that he’s actually taken the time to check out the local Driver’s Manual to eventually return the favor. He enjoys spending time with Tenko, even if it’s just their art class. He enjoys his bike rides around the apartment block, even if he avoids everyone he sees. He even starts to enjoy his Dad’s high ramblings in the car, laughing at a few of the actually funny things and making the occasional quip back.

Even if Shuuichi can't read his mind and make the first move like Kokichi wants, he still loves spending time with him. It’s so weird for him to say that even in his head. ‘Love’ had been poisoned for a long time, he had almost forgotten what love actually was.

Kokichi watches Shuuichi through the window fall ass backwards out of bed, landing on his back with a yelp. He’s quick to scramble to his feet and hurriedly cleans up the mess of cosplay accessories, laundry, and makeup in his room. Kokichi knows that Shuuichi doesn’t mean for it to get this dirty, he just tends to forget to clean it. Sometimes Kokichi will clean his room out of boredom if Shuuichi’s still asleep when they’re staying overnight with each other. Kokichi doesn’t think of him as a slob, but the unwelcome thought crosses his mind sometimes.

Kokichi is unaware that Shuuichi is looking at him through the peephole. Shuuichi can’t help but stare for a moment, feeling bad for taking advantage of Kokichi being unaware of him watching but at the same time enjoying the raw joy plastered on the other boy’s face. It’s a rare and wonderful sight. Shuuichi finally opens the door, trying to make it look like he just got there.

"Saihara! Sorry I'm a bit early." He doesn't want to mention wanting to leave before his Dad could drive too intoxicated or procrastinate for an hour. Kokichi figures that Shuuichi wouldn’t ask anyway. "I brought stuff for the weekend and some clothes I borrowed so I can return them."

Kokichi definitely has a habit of borrowing Shuuichi's clothes, but he always makes sure to return them. Or at least, most of the time. Sometimes it's an ‘our hoodie’ situation. "Can I come in?"

“Y-yeah! Yes of course!” Shuuichi’s a little sweaty like usual. Mostly on his hands. He’s smiling widely and there’s a sort of lovesick look to his eyes. Or maybe he’s just constipated? He does have a tendency to forget about his own lactose intolerance. Kokichi always assumes that he just has a sweating issue, and he wouldn’t be entirely wrong. As long as Shuuichi doesn’t smell bad Kokichi just ignores it to be polite.

"Got any plans? I know you were talking about maybe cosplaying or visiting an arcade or something." He can't really remember since Shuuichi tends to ramble. Kokichi steps inside and takes his shoes off. He sort of awkwardly follows Shuuichi whenever he's at his house, which is what he's waiting to do right now.

“W-Well actually...” Shuuichi fumbles with his hands a bit, shaking as he tries to retrieve something from his pocket. He couldn’t manage to look Kokichi in the eye as he produces a bunch of wads of cash from his hands.

“I, uh, found these in my Uncle’s room saved up for something that I couldn’t really read.... B-but since he’s dead I thought we could go to this really nice restaurant?” Now not only are his hands sweaty, but his face is too. He refuses to look at Kokichi’s face, shoving the cash back in his pocket and fiddling with the brim of his hat.

Kokichi blinks twice, looking down at the handful of money. Wow, that place must be expensive, but it already sounds pretty nice. Dinner with Shuuichi is always something good and fun, whether it's homemade by him or at a restaurant. “Sure.”

“It’s one of my favourite places to go....! I had actually used to go there with my Uncle for my birthday sometimes.. At least when he would remember it. Sometimes my Mom and Dad were in town and we’d go there but that was mostly when I was young.” He steps forward now, boldly choosing to take Kokichi’s hands into his and pulling them to his chest. His heartbeat is rapid, and Kokichi can feel it through his shirt.

“Thats-!” He pauses a bit when Shuuichi takes his hands, staring at them for a bit before flashing Shuuichi a small smile. “That’s kinda shit of him, but at least you can go with me instead of him now.”

“Definitely! Maybe if we tell them it’s my birthday I can get some free dessert to give you!” He seems so overjoyed that Kokichi said yes, face warm and pink and his golden eyes sparkling. Kokichi can’t stop looking at those eyes, even if Shuuichi’s avoiding eye contact. That doesn’t matter to Kokichi, only that he can look at them without seeming weird.

Kokichi laughs a bit at Shuuichi’s free food proposition. “You know I’m always down to scam rich places.”

He thinks for a second... A really nice place like that? Maybe he shouldn’t just wear a sweatshirt and paint stained jeans. Kokichi raises an eyebrow at Shuuichi, and asks, “Should I put on something nicer for it? I mean, dress code and all. Not like, date nice. Since, um, this isn’t a date.”

Shuuichi frowns just a bit for some reason, but immediately perks up. “You can borrow one of my dress shirts and some slacks! I think you’d look really good in casual formal wear. If, uh, that makes any sense.”

Nice going Kokichi. He barely notices the frown, but doesn’t think much of it.

“Ah, that works. I can tell this is gonna be fun, I always really like going out with you.” He didn’t mean to say that last part and didn't think it through too much. Kokichi looks away, a bit embarrassed that he expressed one semi-vulnerable emotion. It’s totally a date in his heart but he doesn’t want to admit it.

Shuuichi’s breath catches in his throat, and he squeezes Kokichi’s hands tighter. “I-I really like going out with you too! A-and I’m really glad you said yes because I... kinda already had made reservations, eheh...” He pulls his hands away to sheepishly scratch his head.

Kokichi gulps and hopes that the blush on his face isn't visible. Damn Shuuichi and his intimacy that makes Kokichi’s heart beat faster! “I mean I don’t have a reason not to say yes, do I? I’d probably accept any dinner proposal you gave me.”

“Wonderful! Let’s go get dressed!” Shuuichi hurries upstairs without another word, tripping and hitting his face but quickly scrambling the rest of the way up.

Kokichi laughs a bit at him falling and follows, subtly checking to make sure that he’s okay. He lets Shuuichi pick out what to wear. Kokichi knows that Shuuichi won’t pick out something that's like super embarrassing anyway.

“Maybe after we go to dinner I can take you along that path in the park near me where that bridge with a bunch of graffiti is. Cops skimp out because not a lot of people go there.” Kokichi offers, just watching Shuuichi as of right now.

“I would love that! But is it safe...? There’s a lot of cults around here.” Shuuichi’s a bit nervous about going places after dark unless he has Gonta with him. Following the tragedy the streets of even the safest city can be dangerous. He grabs an old dress shirt and sets it on the floor, then holds out a pair of dress pants too small on him and sets them on top of the shirt.

“Errrrr...” He thinks about it for a second. Kokichi has a habit of going to somewhat dangerous places. He laughs a bit awkwardly. “Another place, then.”

Shuuichi pulls off his t-shirt and tosses it to the floor, as usual not caring if Kokichi saw him shirtless. Kokichi looks away out of politeness, eyeing the bathroom to change in. He sort of stares out of the corner of his eyes though, not wanting to get caught looking at Shuuichi shirtless. That would be hard to explain again (Last time Shuuichi asked him what was up, and Kokichi panicked and blurted out that Shuuichi had back acne, he felt so bad about it he bought Shuuichi his favorite fast food for dinner). Shuuichi buttons up the new shirt and pulls down his shorts, making sure to retrieve the money from the pockets again. He shuffles around for some slacks in his underwear, looking back on occasion at Kokichi.

Kokichi grabs the clothes Shuuichi picked out for him, heading to the bathroom to quickly change. Kokichi spends a bit making sure he looks alright and fussing over his appearance, but he comes out eventually. His hair is it’s normal mess, sticking up some on either side from how much Kokichi plays with it. He leaves the top button of the dress shirt undone, not feeling like buttoning it up all the way.

“We ready?” Kokichi asks.

Shuuichi quickly shoves something in his pocket that was on his nightstand, turning to Kokichi with a thumbs up. “Yes! Ready.”

Kokichi flattens a few wrinkles in his shirt, following Shuuichi out. The whole time Kokichi’s got a small smile on his face. He looks excited, both because he’s going on a date restaurant trip and to a fancy place. He cleans up well when he’s not wearing ratty old clothes.

“Wow... you look really handsome, Ouma-kun!!!” Shuuichi’s sort of just staring without realising. When Kokichi looks up at him he snaps out of it. He offers his hand to Kokichi sheepishly and they head off on their way in Shuuichi’s car.

“Uh, thanks, Saihara.” Kokichi responds a bit awkwardly, taking Shuuichi’s hand. Kokichi never knows how to respond to the (admittedly few) compliments he gets, especially from Shuuichi. He tries to come back with one too. “You wear suits a lot but you still look nice in them too.”

“You really think so?” Shuuichi raises an eyebrow, smiling wildly when Kokichi nods. It's a short ride to the restaurant and luckily it doesn’t seem as packed as it could be. Shuuichi leads Kokichi inside and they’re led to their booth. He sits down and looks expectantly at Kokichi as if hoping that he’ll sit next to him.

And he does! Kokichi sits a mere few inches away from Shuuichi on the same side as him. He accidentally leans against Shuuichi a bit but pulls back once he’s fully seated. “Whoa... this place looks really nice.”

Kokichi glances at the menu, literally cringing at the prices listed. Well, Shuuichi did say it was really nice, and he has the money for it. Kokichi’s used to getting yelled at if the cost for dinner goes over 2,000 UC for two people.

“Almost seems kinda odd to pay so much to cook your own food, but I assume that it's really really good stuff.” He picks out the things that he wants, writing them down on his phone so he can remember and saying them out loud to Shuuichi. “Just don’t text me complaining that you can’t shit because you ate something you aren’t supposed to.”

Shuuichi laughs a bit. “No promises.”

The two men look through the menu, with Shuuichi recommending certain things. Kokichi just looks at the ingredient and says no to anything with stuff he doesn’t like. When the waiter comes by Shuuichi orders, looking at Kokichi to confirm the order. Kokichi nods and orders a drink (only messing up once for a change!), and once the waiter leaves he starts conversation.

“So, anything been going on lately? I’ve been learning some about watercolors I guess. They’re not really my style since I can’t make mistakes though.”

“Well I reminded Shirogane-san about the commission she owes me for a Mikan wig.... but she said she still hasn’t started it. I’m a bit nervous since it’s been about 4 months b-but I’m sure if she doesn’t start soon she’ll refund me!” He doesn’t sound hopeful. Shuuichi looks around, reaching up to toy with the brim of his hat before realising it’s rude to be wearing something like that inside. Not wanting to receive stares in an upscale restaurant he (very) reluctantly removes it and sets it beside him.

“Damn, that sucks,” is really all that Kokichi can say to that.

“I’m close to failing math again.... Trig is hard a-and my teacher is really unrelenting…” Shuuichi laughs a bit.

"Haha, yeah. I'm failing chemistry and english again even though I'm retaking it from last year because I failed that too... Actually, Shinguuji has been tutoring me in english and history as of last week. He’s still a total prick but I’ve been doing better, I guess.” Korekiyo doesn’t really talk much during their tutoring unless it’s educational content. Kokichi’s fine with that as long as he’s not being bothered.

Shuuichi nods, taking a sip of his drink. “He doesn’t tutor math or chemistry.. I think he’s almost just as bad as me with those subjects actually.” He thinks to himself for a second. “I used to have a crush on him actually. I left a note in his locker first year and he looked at it and ripped it in half. I thought he was super pretty…”

"Yeah, he is kinda nice to look at I guess but that’s it. Wonder how he keeps all that hair so untangled.... I’m still kinda amazed that he’s dating Gokuhara. They don’t seem like a match at all but I don’t really know them that well.” It’s none of Kokichi’s business, but he sure does like to stick his nose in anything he can. Kokichi would never discuss Gonta and Korekiyo’s relationship with anyone but Shuuichi, and even still. It would feel wrong to talk a bunch about them like that.

“Wow.... I wish I had a boyfriend.” Shuuichi glances at Kokichi out of the corner of his eye, staring almost comically for a few moments until the waiter comes by. Shuuichi’s slurped down his drink, and the waiter refills his soda while another brings out the first course.

"A boyfriend would be nice... I keep thinking about it ever since I realized I'm not bi with Chabashira..." He looks away from Shuuichi for a bit, scared that if he looks he'll be figured out. Does he want it? Yes. Is he terrified? Absolutely.

Kokichi and Shuuichi lock eyes for a second. Shuuichi looks away first and blurts out, “I have a job interview tomorrow actually! I’ve been applying to a few places and I hope I get in on one. Let’s hope they don’t drug test me though.”

“I work at a gas station that’s like right next to my apartment complex, but I guess you already know that. The manager kind of hates me but I haven’t been fired yet. I think it’s because I caught him doing coke in the break room and I said I’d tell the police if he dared to fire me. I wasn’t actually planning to tell the police but it worked. I work shifts whenever I can, there’s not really a set schedule.” Kokichi looks down at their first course. “Are we gonna eat?”

Shuuichi grabs skewers for both him and Kokichi, handing one over. “Here you go, Ouma-kun!”

"Oh, that looks really good." His face lights up at the taste- it's been a while since he's had anything other than instant meals or cheap fast food.

Kokichi can feel Shuuichi’s eyes on him, though he’s not bothered by it. He hears Shuuichi mumble something giddily to himself, but he can’t quite understand it. A finger pokes his cheek and Kokichi looks up, seeing Shuuichi holding a different one out towards Kokichi.

"Mm?" Kokichi looks at it for a second and leans forward to take it in his mouth. He and Shuuichi lock eyes for a second before Kokichi closes his own and moves back to chew.

“Isn’t it good, Ouma-kun?” Shuuichi looks at him expectantly, hoping for a good answer.

Kokichi flashes Shuuichi a smile. "Yeah. It is.”

He’s really enjoying himself tonight. Kokichi's ended up moving a bit, and he's sitting directly next to Shuuichi with their legs touching slightly. Kokichi definitely notices, but doesn't dare move so he can cherish any bit of physical contact with Shuuichi.

Their course finishes with a short conversation about how everything tastes. It’s finished pretty fast, and taken away from them almost right after they finish it off. They’ve got pretty fast service here, but Kokichi expected that from a restaurant that serves grape soda in a crystal glass.

Shuuichi’s hand comes to rest on top of Kokichi’s own. Kokichi looks down at their hands, thinking that Shuuichi made a mistake and put his hand down on Kokichi's. He hums a bit to himself out of habit, not realizing that he's doing it. Shuuichi does hold his hand pretty often though... Kokichi very, very slowly moves his fingers up and sort of interlocks them with Shuuichi's own. Shuuichi may be the one with a sweating problem but Kokichi's feeling hotter than usual.

“The meat stuff is gonna be coming out soon, they’ve got the cooking times on a little card.” Shuuichi gestures to the card with his free hand. “Though, I usually cook them for less time.”

"I have no guarantee that I won't eat at least one piece of the pure raw meat. Carnal desires must be satiated." It's a joke... maybe? Kokichi would totally eat raw ass meat just for fun.

“Please don’t eat raw meat, Ouma-kun...” Shuuichi whines and squeezes Kokichi’s hand. Eventually the main course comes.

Hmmm... this could get a little tricky with only one hand. But Kokichi is determined. He stabs a piece of meat and gently sticks it in. Kokichi looks at the cooking times Once and continuously takes his out too early, not caring about raw meat consumption. At one point he just sticks a raw piece of steak into his mouth. But he seems to be really enjoying it anyway, even if he's not using any of the sauces.

"Wonder what the dessert's gonna taste like… Thanks for taking me, Saihara." Kokichi grins a bit, wiping his mouth on his hand then wiping his hand on a napkin to be Slightly less slobbish.

The smile on Shuuichi’s face is one that would be hard to wipe away. His eyes glimmer and he squeezes Kokichi’s hand again. “It’s been a pleasure, Ouma-kun!”

Eventually the main course ends, and then it's time to wait for the dessert. While they wait Shuuichi seems to grow a bit nervous. He keeps shoving his free hand in his pocket and glancing around, biting his lip and taking deep breaths. Kokichi’s about to question it when Shuuichi speaks up.

“Uh-Uhm Ouma-kun.... there’s actually something I’ve been meaning to ask you..”

"Hmm?" Kokichi looks up from his drink. His hand is kinda sweaty in Shuuichi's own, but he still refuses to move it. He doesn’t really have a clue what’s going on with Shuuichi, though he’s a bit worried. Did something happen? Is Shuuichi about to reveal something bad? Did he kill another family member?

“U-Uhm well... we’ve been friends for a while now a-and... I really enjoy your company— like a lot. You don’t make fun of me for being creepy or gross or stupid and you listen to me when I ramble and you’re just really... really nice to me, and I’ve just been thinking that... maybe....” Shuuichi fumbles around in his pocket, gripping something and fishing it out. “Maybe we could-“

”And here is your dessert! Give me a moment to heat up the chocolate dip.”

Both boys look over at the waiter. Shuuichi retracts his hand automatically, both his hands clenched into fists. The waiter talks about the ingredients, puts some sort of alcohol on top, and lights it on fire. Kokichi stares with an open mouth, jumping back just a bit at the sudden burst of flames. He looks at Shuuichi, wondering what he was trying to say.

“...Maybe we could be best friends.” 

Kokichi hears his words and deflates a bit, though all the feelings of worry melt away. "Oh, um..? I thought we were already."

Shuuichi doesn’t reply, his hair obscuring his face from Kokichi’s view. “You go ahead and start eating... I think my stomach hurts too much right now..”

“Oh, um.. Okay.” Kokichi skewers a marshmallow and sticks it in. He starts to get worried about Shuuichi. He's hiding his face even without his hat, and he sounds a lot less chipper than he usually does. Kokichi decides to test the waters a bit. Maybe Shuuichi will talk if he brings it up. "Saihara? Is something wrong? What was that in your pocket?"

Kokichi watches Shuuichi gulp and open and close his mouth a few times as if he wanted to say something. Eventually, Shuuichi reaches into his pocket again and pulls out what he’s been hiding- two necklaces with half of a heart on each one. The two seem to be meant to fit together. Engraved on each side is one word:

_”His.”_

Kokichi stares at it for a few seconds. “Oh! A-” He tries to smile. “A best friends necklace..! I don’t really wear jewelry though.”

“Excuse me for a second!” Shuuichi practically yelps, standing up from the table and rushing away from the table. He bumps against someone on the pathway to the bathroom, but Shuuichi doesn’t apologize and he disappears from Kokichi’s view.

… Was it something he said?

Kokichi looks at the chocolate dripping from his marshmallow with a frown. It’s too hot to eat right now. He blows on it, giving worried glances over at the bathroom. Shuuichi is Not okay, it’s pretty clear. Kokichi can usually tell when Shuuichi’s not right.

_”hey u good?”_

That should do it, right?

Shuuichi’s phone dings right beside him and Kokichi groans. Of course Shuuichi left his phone. He can’t help but continue to stare at the door, getting almost excited when he sees people leave only to have it drop when he realizes that it’s not Shuuichi.

When Shuuichi does exit, he’s got a lopsided smile on his face that doesn’t look like it belongs there. Kokichi watches him sit back down, farther away from Kokichi this time.

“Aha.. sorry for taking so long. I hope it didn’t get cold!” Shuuichi grabs his prong for dipping various small desserts in chocolate, looking over the options and hesitating.

Kokichi stuffs his cooled off marshmallow in his mouth, looking down at the table and wondering what the fuck just happened. He looks at the necklaces Shuuichi left on the table, making sure that Shuuichi watches as he takes it and clips it around his neck. Kokichi won’t leave it on for too long, but he hopes it’ll at least make Shuuichi happier.

Shuuichi stuffs his in his pocket afterwards, hand hovering over it for too long. Kokichi would deny watching all his moves if Shuuichi asked, but he’s definitely doing it. He can’t tear his eyes away from every little movement Shuuichi makes. Even if it doesn’t give Kokichi all the answers like he wants.

Testing the waters with a bit of conversation should help. Kokichi knows he’s godawful at this, but it’s easier in person than over text at least. “Um…. it was cool that they lit it on fire. I lit a guy on fire once.”

“... You did?”

Bad conversation topic. “Yeah I just lit him on fire. Anyway, uh, chocolate.” He shoves a chunk of cake into the dip and stuffs it in his mouth, not caring that it’s burning the inside of his mouth.

“Did you like, accidentally light him on fire? Or was it on purpose? Was he hurting you and you wanted revenge? Was it his hair or his clothes?” Shuuichi’s voice shakes a bit, less excitement to it than usual when he talks over and over again.

“New topic.” Kokichi’s mouth is full but he thinks Shuuichi gets the memo.

Shuuichi smiles at him way too happily and starts slowly eating the dessert course. Not many more words are said, the two exchanging nervous glances at each other. When they catch each other's eyes they both look away instantly, trying to pretend as if they weren’t trying to read the other’s mind.

“Hey, Ouma-kun, I’ve got a question for you. Can I call you a cute little nickname? It’s, um, it’s really okay if not I just thought it would be nice.” Shuuichi buckles his seatbelt, his wallet having taken a huge loss from their dinner. He totally forgot about the birthday thing with getting free dessert, but Kokichi doesn’t think he could even stomach more.

“Sure.” Kokichi sits down in the passenger seat, trying his best to relax. “As long as it’s not something stupid.”

“Is Kichi okay then?”

Kokichi thinks about it for a second. It’s different from his Dad’s malicious nickname refusing to call him his actual name. It’s different from Rantaro’s, though that’s more the meaning than the actual nickname. He shrugs, figuring that he’s get used to it quickly. “Sure.”

When they get back to Shuuichi’s house Kokichi flops onto the bed after changing into his normal clothes. Big, warm meals always made him want to sleep. It’s a miracle that he didn’t crash in Shuuichi’s car. He yawns, lying on the side of the bed designated as his. “I’m gonna crash for a bit.”

Shuuichi nods, sitting next to him and just going on his phone. Kokichi can hear a few dings of Shuuichi’s phone, but then the ringer is turned off. Probably texting Gonta. Kokichi would ask Shuuichi’s friend what was wrong but he very much prefers not to have to talk to Gonta one on one or get any comments like ‘oooo you caaaare about him how gay’ or ‘srs question would you kiss shuuichi y/y’.

He lies still, just wanting to sleep so that tomorrow can happen. Maybe tomorrow will be better. Maybe tomorrow Shuuichi won’t be acting so damn weird. It would give enough cooldown time that Kokichi could ask Shuuichi what happened and possibly get an honest answer. Kokichi hates it when Shuuichi’s lying to him even if it’s just about how Shuuichi feels, it’s a rare occasion but every time Kokichi can’t help but feel betrayed. Even though Kokichi himself lies worse.

“You won’t have that nightmare again, he’s here with you now. You never have nightmares around Kichi.”

Kokichi feels a hand run through his hair, slow like Shuuichi’s just feeling how soft it is. He steadies his breath, feeling his heart beat even faster. He can’t see it, but he thinks that Shuuichi’s just staring at him while he talks to himself.

“Better stop thinking like this…” Shuuichi takes his own deep breath, breathing out annoyed with himself. “It’d be rude to have an episode with him here.” He stands up, turning the lights out and lying down beside Kokichi. Many times has Shuuichi accidentally wrapped around Kokichi in the middle of the night; when they both woke at the same time it just ended in awkward laughter and apology. Kokichi had a feeling there were at least a few times that Shuuichi did it on purpose, and his theory is confirmed when Shuuichi gently wraps his arm over Kokichi’s stomach and presses his face against Kokichi’s hair.

“I love you, Kichi.”


	22. Warriorsonas

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kokichi meets Himiko Yumeno, the adult version of kids who eat grass and pretend to be cats at recess. It goes better than even he expected... did he make a new friend?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I was really inspired by the way Himiko speaks in the Japanese version for this... Enjoy! It's a nice, silly, and fun chapter to make up for my next one.
> 
> TWs: Weed

As the weather gets nicer (read: colder), Kokichi starts taking walks around parks and buildings and his school, rememorizing the layout of everything every time and finding new places or things. The coat his mother got him for his birthday has come in handy, a deep royal blue color that he always liked but hasn’t had the motivation to wear in the past few years. He never really approaches anyone, unless he sees Shuuichi or Ryoma. It’s a lot better than hanging around at home either way.

There’s a girl that he keeps seeing around. He’s watched her fall out of a tree at least two times. She’s got red hair, and a dark grey cardigan over her seifuku. Kokichi’s currently watching her pick the leaves off of a plant on the ground and nibble on each one. He’s not one for going out ‘people watching’ or whatever, but he takes notice of anyone around him as long as they don’t take notice of him.

There she goes again. She pulls out a sketchbook and a large ziploc bag full of different colored gel pens. Chewing on a leaf, she starts drawing the same white and black striped cat with red eyes over and over again. Kokichi squints, trying to get a better view of what she’s drawing. He feels like he recognizes it, at least a bit, but he’s not too sure.

“Mm… I can tell thou is staring at me. Begone whence you came or come forward into my territory and speak of who thou art.”

Kokichi gulps, watching the girl turn and point in a direction that is not towards him, pause, and turn his direction and point again.

“You were eating leaves.” He tries to at least explain himself a bit. It’s normal to stare at someone who's eating leaves.

The girl doesn’t speak for a while, staring at the ground like she’s trying to figure out what to say. “Tis Mallow leaves, for I had a bellyache.” She slowly grabs a new one, barely even chewing on it.

Now, Kokichi’s no herbalist nor does he know literally anything about plants, but he’s fairly certain that those are not ‘mallow leaves’. Mostly because he’s doubting this girl’s intellect and not because he knows what leaves are. He doesn’t respond, just giving her a weird look as he slowly comes out of his spot.

“.. Wait.” She says, watching Kokichi start to leave. “You. I mean… Thou.”

Kokichi stops in his tracks, just barely looking over his shoulder while he wonders what she wants.

“My name is Himiko Yumeno… apprentice of Merlin… medicine cat from Thunderclan… you shall also refer to me by my clan name…. Rubytiger..!” It’s like she’s trying to speak in a dramatic tone, but she’s not quite there. Kokichi recognizes the tinge of hoarseness in her voice from times when he goes entire days without speaking to anyone.

“Okay.” He pauses. That name sounds familiar. “Wait hold on a second, are you friends with Chabashira?”

Himiko seems to instantly perk up, now looking directly at Kokichi. “Thou doth know the maiden Tenko, I am willing to let bygones be bygones and forgive thee for staring at me now. Um… you weren’t making fun of me… right.”

Well, technically he was a little bit in his head, but he’ll be nice for Tenko’s sake. Kokichi shakes his head no, taking another step approaching Himiko.

“None shall dare make fun of the great Himiko Yumeno..!” Her voice cracks a bit. “Erm. Would you like a blunt.”

Kokichi sits down a good few feet away from her at this. He’s interested now. “.. You just have one with you at school?”

True to her word, Himiko pulls out two from her sleeve. “I giveth to thee. I do not really like how they taste. My garden is full of plentiful herb such as these, so I do not really mind giving them to people. My Momma taught me to roll them, alas it would be more fun if the paper was more majestic though.”

“.. Do you eat them?”

“Am I not supposed to?”

He’s got half a mind to just turn around and leave, honestly. Tenko’s words asking him to be kind to Himiko ring in his mind though. It’s not something he wants to do, definitely, but he’s already here.

“....” Himiko purses her lips, scratching at her face. She fidgets with her hands and slowly pulls something out of her backpack. It’s a small cerulean blue paperback book with gold text in English. There’s an old library label on it of a school he doesn’t recognize. The book looks old as hell, half of the front cover torn and desperately taped back together. Dogears have been flattened back out over and over again. When Kokichi glances into her backpack, the two other books look to be in the same condition.

“What’s that?” Kokichi asks while Himiko appears to be gathering up the courage to talk about it.

“It is my favorite book. Um.. my gramma gave these books to me before she- uh. I just want to read it right now.” She looks down, opening up to the bookmarked page. It’s a wooden decorative bookmark, with a break in it that had been glued back together.

Kokichi wonders what happened to her old-type language now. Maybe she just forgets or gets embarrassed or something. He’s too used to being around people who are the ones to start a conversation, Himiko’s silent page turns are making him want to leave even more. He spares a glance towards her sketchbook and the gel pens from before.

“Oh, hey I used to have those gel pens. Like the pack of 150. I begged my parents to get them for me and I used em til they all dried out.” That works okay for a conversation starter he guesses.

Himiko doesn’t look up. “You can draw if you want. Go on the next page.”

Well, if there’s nothing better to do…

He sure does draw. First to get him in the mood is a few little doodles of Shuuichi’s cat Hajime. He always makes the most expressive faces that are funny as hell. Kokichi looks up at a nearby tree and starts drawing that as well. Pens are a medium he doesn’t really use anymore, but the tree doesn’t turn out too bad. He starts coloring it in a blue, purple, and gold color scheme, doing a bit of shading with a darker purple and highlight in gold here and there.

The page is flipped to the next one. He does a really bad detailed drawing of Hajime the cat and crosses it out. The next one doesn’t come out as good as he wanted it to, but it’s good enough to not scribble away. Out of boredom he secretly tries to look at some of Himiko’s previous drawings, but can’t do so in a way where he A) can actually see them and B) won’t get caught. He draws the cat Himiko always draws from memory, with a note pointing to it saying ‘your cat, I think’. No more inspiration with pens hits him, so he gently closes the sketchbook and sets it forward.

Kokichi clears his throat once a few minutes of silence follow, and points down at the book that Himiko is reading. “So, uh, wanna tell me about that book?”

This is what gets her to look up. “... You wanna know?”

He nods, and Kokichi can see the light grow in her eyes, a smile now showing on her face. She clears her throat, and announces, “Behold, the tome you see before is, ‘Yellowfang's Secret’!”

Kokichi can’t even get a word in edgewise as she launches into the plot of the book. First is the overview, all in old timey speak in her own words. Then she delves into the main character, Yellowfang, and some of the more important characters (cats?) in the book. She talks about the whole plot of the book excitedly, turning to different pages to read little snippets out loud. She explains the basics of the cat society in the whole series, which Kokichi thinks makes no sense at all but he nods along like he understands anyways. Kokichi wishes he knew English as well as Himiko does, it’d make things a lot easier.

Suddenly Himiko pauses and hums, looking Kokichi up and down. He opens his mouth to question it but she speaks before he can. “Hmm.. Thine shall receive a Warriorsona.”

He remembers Tenko mentioning something like that before. It’s the cat that Himiko draws a bunch if he’s getting it right. Himiko starts drawing something, looking up at Kokichi on occasion before she slowly turns the sketchbook around.

It’s a dark navy cat with his purple eyes and shaggy fur. Up above it is ‘Thistlethorn’ and a vague cat shape with a bored looking face (at least that’s what Kokichi interprets it as). 

“So is that me as a cat?”

“Yea, this is Thistlethorn of Shadowclan. The name is ‘cause I kind of thought you were a prick at first. I also drew inspiration from the cat that you drew too.” Kokichi can’t tell if he should be insulted by this or not, but he listens to Himiko anyways. “This is thou’s clan name. Use it wisely… thither art people who wouldst bully thou for this. Thou art safe with me as I am with thou.”

“Sure thing, Yumeno.” He tries his best not to let his usual prick-ness show through, he really doesn’t mean it this time.

They do actually talk some more for a bit. Kokichi has a hard time keeping up with some of her words- both the language and the words used- but he actually tries. She talks about what social media she’s on, and Kokichi has to admit that he just has an art and animal picture instagram that he doesn’t actually use and doesn’t talk to people on. They follow each other but both understand that they likely won’t actually communicate on them. Kokichi’s heard of ‘Tumblr’ before but not ‘Fanfiction.net’ and he absolutely has Never heard of ‘Ao3’. But Himiko told him that’s okay since the website was destroyed and ‘everyone moved back to fanfiction’.

But eventually Himiko has to go, getting a call from her mom for getting picked up for dinner. Kokichi actually waves her goodbye, sitting in the grass as the sun sets with a small smile on his face.


End file.
